Fic: HP, (sb/rl, rl/ofc, mwpp), drabble, "He's not going to say."
Title: "He's not going to say."
Word Count: 360
Author: whitmans_kiss
Rating: PG
Warnings: Smoking, drinking, two instances of crude language
Challenge: Dialogue, straight!Remus
Characters; Pairings: MWPP; Sirius/Remus, Remus/OFC
Disclaimer: All characters property of JKRowling. Story is original and mine.
Authors Notes: I love it when Remus smokes. I also think this is the first time I've ever, ever had a straight Remus. Written in 20 minutes during science class, unbeta'd.
“Moony, why don’t you date around?” Sirius looked up from the communal plate of chips, blinking.
“Because, Sirius, I am - ”
“If you say anything about your furry little problem, you’re buying the next round,” James interjected, waving his beer in front of Remus to make his point.
Remus quirked his cigarette in his fingers before taking a drag and blowing the smoke right in Sirius’ face.
“I was going to say, I don’t date around because I’m already happily seeing a very nice girl, and she would be quite put out if I started - ah, putting out for other people.”
James gave a little start.
“Wa-oh, Moony, what’s this you’re dating? Why haven’t you told us before now?”
“Didn’t know your girly bits weren’t broken,” Sirius remarked, wafting the smoke away with a defiant wave of his hand.
“There’s only one twat at this table, and it’s you.”
“Aw, break my heart, why don’t you, Remus -”
“Such an insult, really, Moon -”
“What, Remus doesn’t have girly bits?”
“No, Peter; I’ve got a cock, and it works just fine, thank you Sirius.”
“Bet your girlfriend disagrees.”
“Oh, har har, Padfoot.”
“Eh, lighten up. What’s the unfortunate girl’s name?”
“You know he’s not going to say, Pads.”
“That’s right, James.”
“But Reeemus -”
“I’m not going to say.”
“He’s not going to say.”
“No, he’s not going to say.”
“But -”
“No.”
“What if -”
“No.”
“Even -”
“Definitely not.”
“I - oh, ooo, hkk-”
“Oi, Petey, easy there, mate -”
“-- oooh, sorry about that -”
“Moony.”
“Sirius.”
“Peter nearly died without knowing your bird’s name.”
“He choked on a chip; hardly certain death. Besides, he’s fine now, look -”
“-right as rain, you know… ugh, stuck in my throat, there -”
“But -”
“Enough, Padfoot. Moony’s not gonna say.”
“Not near drunk enough to tell, that’s what.”
“Well, we need another round, then!”
Sirius signaled the bartender and the conversation shifted, Remus’ girl soon forgotten, and after a few more beers he couldn’t remember why he wanted to be drunk anymore, except perhaps to loosen the tight, twisted feeling he realized he felt deep in his chest.
Word Count: 360
Author: whitmans_kiss
Rating: PG
Warnings: Smoking, drinking, two instances of crude language
Challenge: Dialogue, straight!Remus
Characters; Pairings: MWPP; Sirius/Remus, Remus/OFC
Disclaimer: All characters property of JKRowling. Story is original and mine.
Authors Notes: I love it when Remus smokes. I also think this is the first time I've ever, ever had a straight Remus. Written in 20 minutes during science class, unbeta'd.
“Moony, why don’t you date around?” Sirius looked up from the communal plate of chips, blinking.
“Because, Sirius, I am - ”
“If you say anything about your furry little problem, you’re buying the next round,” James interjected, waving his beer in front of Remus to make his point.
Remus quirked his cigarette in his fingers before taking a drag and blowing the smoke right in Sirius’ face.
“I was going to say, I don’t date around because I’m already happily seeing a very nice girl, and she would be quite put out if I started - ah, putting out for other people.”
James gave a little start.
“Wa-oh, Moony, what’s this you’re dating? Why haven’t you told us before now?”
“Didn’t know your girly bits weren’t broken,” Sirius remarked, wafting the smoke away with a defiant wave of his hand.
“There’s only one twat at this table, and it’s you.”
“Aw, break my heart, why don’t you, Remus -”
“Such an insult, really, Moon -”
“What, Remus doesn’t have girly bits?”
“No, Peter; I’ve got a cock, and it works just fine, thank you Sirius.”
“Bet your girlfriend disagrees.”
“Oh, har har, Padfoot.”
“Eh, lighten up. What’s the unfortunate girl’s name?”
“You know he’s not going to say, Pads.”
“That’s right, James.”
“But Reeemus -”
“I’m not going to say.”
“He’s not going to say.”
“No, he’s not going to say.”
“But -”
“No.”
“What if -”
“No.”
“Even -”
“Definitely not.”
“I - oh, ooo, hkk-”
“Oi, Petey, easy there, mate -”
“-- oooh, sorry about that -”
“Moony.”
“Sirius.”
“Peter nearly died without knowing your bird’s name.”
“He choked on a chip; hardly certain death. Besides, he’s fine now, look -”
“-right as rain, you know… ugh, stuck in my throat, there -”
“But -”
“Enough, Padfoot. Moony’s not gonna say.”
“Not near drunk enough to tell, that’s what.”
“Well, we need another round, then!”
Sirius signaled the bartender and the conversation shifted, Remus’ girl soon forgotten, and after a few more beers he couldn’t remember why he wanted to be drunk anymore, except perhaps to loosen the tight, twisted feeling he realized he felt deep in his chest.