Birthday Musings
Collation spot for other posts nearing B-day period
19/11/21
23/11/21
Written during a sneaky within state trip in-between covid lockdowns.
16/11/14
When you would photograph everyday things on instagram and make them look a lot fancier than they are. I would have been working in neuro ICU then on my last rotation as an IP, being rather naughty having painted nails at work!
20/11/13
Unfortunatly just tweets.
20/11/12
The mind of a 20 yr old new grad...
19/11/11
19/11/10
11 years ago....
23/11/10
23/11/08
20/11/07
Nothing even remotely birthday related! lol on any posts - either side of this date either.
19/11/06
Would have just finished 1st year uni...
I don't actually have time to read through these...
So many posts I'd like to write, so little time.
My brain has draw a blank. I'm blaming the baby for everything even though I don't think it's linked (then again, 1st trimester symptoms can be so vague (bloating, feeling shitty and lightheadedness) that sometimes you do think you're just losing the plot rather than it being pregnancy related)
I'm gonna use prompts this year cause rambling can be hard work.
1. How are you celebrating your birthday
Well on the actual day, I was working - they gave me a lovely ridiculously easy wardable patient 1:1 only for the fact that he had CPE (carbapenem producing enterobacteriaceae - the bacteria itself produces an enzyme that breaks down the antibiotics)which they really really really don't want being spread around so I was extra extra careful with handwashing and wearing those yellow gowns. He could easily be doubled but to reduce spread... My swap buddy, Lisa - had an ex? or current ANU professor who now has quiet severe and violent delirium which tends to swing both hypo and hyper active depending on what time of day it is (hyper at night and hypo during the day) - so that was some "don't go near him Rita just call for help) warnings which I heeded fairly well.
I've never been hit. 9 years. But that's mostly by luck and having forewarning each time I've had such pt-- I've not yet been the first one to discover someone was violently delirious. There's always someone that realises and reaction times will vary.
I informed people to wish me a happy birthday, and reminded them no cake since I can't have any.
Jomaline was really sweet. She remembered, and pre bought a bunch of sugar free treats from the pharmacy which I opened and shared with her cluster (which was opposite mine) with the warning - these are really good but they can give you diarrhea if you have too many ...
There's no such thing as a sweet treat without consequences of some kind.
On the Sunday I threw a BBQ. It's the usual backyard affair with too much food (that tasted surprisingly good) too much smoke (fuck I forgot how much smoke charcoal gives out and actually it poured rain (which is why I changed it from a Beach BBQ to the backyard at home since we have a covered area).
2. When you think about the last 12 months, what immediately comes to mind?
What a whirlwind of a year.
Both going very slowly (when your TTC and wondering when your single life will be over)
and very fast - covid rules literally changing on a daily basis and working in two different districts with different rules and protocols... Covid going all the way from being the WORST thing you can get to - once you and the majority are vaccinated the fear is muchly reduced and hey! let's all have BBQ and go to the shops and go to restaurants....
Vaccine passports (who'd have thunk that ever be a thing).
Friendships broken due to misguided views on vaccination -- large protests in the community against vaccination.
When you think the weirdest thing that can happen is Trump being president of USA-- things can get more interesting still.
3. What are you grateful for?
That I've had a ridiculously easy time conceiving (sure it took a year but come on, if that's the worst thing...) and hopefully despite all the mounting risk factors I get the NVB I'd like to have
(risk factors: age over 30, GDM, prinip) and if I don't get that, it's sorta like having a wedding go a different way to the way you planned. One day of your life. And as long as both parties are alive (and married), then the aftermath can always be dealt with.
4. What surprising change(s) took place in the last year?
Returning to ICU as a senior from casual once a week/once a month/being given only the easy patients -- funnily how fast that can deskill you -- to permanent full time senior -- was harder than I expect. There's been a few lumps and bumps.
When your trying, you never know when it'll work. Could be immediately, could take months... so that was a surprise too.
At least, for the most part, besides covid everything else was stable : financial. Housing. family (no one got sick or died)so that's a real blessing I think. It's nice to have stability amongst this mess (of covid, of changing back jobs out of midwifery) - this should also go in the what are you grateful for section really.
I was surprised with how much money I made despite not doing overtime -- don't get me wrong, I work a lot of extra shifts at SSH but they're mostly all shifts I wouldn't get as overtime anyway (morning shifts, basically, are extremely rarely given out as overtime) so I don't see it as a bad thing but rather a good thing - that I'm working more hours- paid only 10% extra - but they're el primo hours so why complain? Nurses, when they find good jobs, get paid rather well and have a moderate amount of stress in their jobs.
I'm mildly surprised so many people are leaving ICU. Other states pay better and have lower costs of living. If 120k is the top income for a floor nurse (like, not an educator, not a CNS or otherwise) but my living expenses were say, halved (for what we paid for this house you could have a beach side mansion in other parts of the country) then why would you stay in Sydney? People are choosing to retire now rather than say in 1 or 2 more years (or take their long service now and maybe rethink if they want to come back in 1.5 years).
5. What goals have you achieved in the last 12 months? Have you made progress on your Bucket List?
Having a baby was probably on that list that I haven't written down.
Transitioning back to ICU full time in general ICU was definitely something I wanted when I decided I really couldn't do midwifery full time.
Continuing to keep up with my hospital midwifery is another challenge that I think I've been managing well with.
I'm fairly competent at CRRT, which is nice.
6. What goals were you unsuccessful in reaching this year?
I should have put more effort into getting officially signed off for connecting and disconnecting someone onto a variety of CRRT circuit- but to be honest I don't feel completely confident about it as of yet. Troubleshooting could be better also.
Finally learning -- through trial and error -- how to set up those new ventilators we got and I did't get to use whilst I was a barely there casual.
I haven't cut any episiotomies so I haven't improved there either.
Any semblance of repairing old relationships I frequently think about (S) and wonder if it's worth bothering
7. Where have you stepped out of your comfort zone in the last year?
Moving to SSH as a new graduate has certainly been a challenge -- short lived as it was (4 months, 2 1 of which was probably more confusion and trying to give it a chance, 1 month of this is crap and 2 months of figuring out how to get out of there). I've learnt a lot about ... the system, about myself, about the stresses other health professions outside of ICU face... It's been an experience.
8. 8. What was challenging about the last year? There was a fair amount of uncertainty in my professional life (trying to transition back to ICU) which probably didn't help the uncertainty embedded in my personal life (TTC).
Especially after about 5 years of stability in neuro ICU I think it's been really good to get out of the comfort zone - because that's literally where nursing careers go to die.
And fortunately I had a good chunk of time there prior to mat leave: because returning after a whole year is definitely going to be a challenge (will I remember anything?!).
9. What was fun about the last year?
Having the whole house to ourselves. We stopped taking renters after our last - it's good money but the space and freedom is a blessing especially in covid. It's lovely.
10. What difficult problem or challenging situation is top of mind?
Just fears about the third trimester turning me into a monster. It's end of 2nd and I'm luckily not that big at all for 2nd (in comparison to the rest of me I can pass for chubby) - but the backache is already a major pain. I want to work until 38 weeks so...this won't be possible if things get unmanageable.
Sometimes I think about going into other (healthcare related professions) in order to get out of nightshift.
11. If you could speak to yourself 10 years ago, what would Younger You think about the problem above?
This probably reflects more in my work life. Built your pathophysiology knowledge. It'll always come in handy. Anyone can follow policy but it's more rewarding when you understand the details of what is going on. Keep saving. It's always held you in good steed.
Don't forget that you need to look your best - looks are important. (I think I often forget this one even now).
12. If you could speak to yourself 10 years from now, what would Older You say about the situation or problem?
You can always do better, but in general your basically doing fine.
13. What do you want your life to look like this time next year?
Oh geeze.
Health
Hope I can complete Oxfam successfully. That be cool. Maybe be back oc-ing or dragon boating. Don't know how those will go with a baby...
Career
I'd still be on mat leave and not thinking about work. That would be the goal, to not think about work for a whole year.
Business
Honestly.. worst business person ever ... me.
Financial
Hopefully there's even less of the mortgage to pay off. Once that's done... I want Pete to relax a little if he wants to. We could get somewhere bigger. Or not. Or renovate this place. Or not.
Home life and/or family
Hope the kid sleeps well and hasn't got too many issues breastfeeding. I hope to exclusively breastfeed whilst introducing solids into the first year.
Romantic relationships
Hopefully post baby the sex life will be ok...
Friends
This will be a challenge. I have no idea. I hope I have time for my single friends and don't discard them like old books.
Hobbies
I do miss being part of a team sport.
Lifestyle
Could be greener. More gardening.
Spiritual
Not quite sure with this one.
Personal development
I'm sure there will be plenty...
14. What could you do right away to make that vision a reality?
Take a chill pill. Things will be as they be.
19/11/21
23/11/21
Written during a sneaky within state trip in-between covid lockdowns.
16/11/14
When you would photograph everyday things on instagram and make them look a lot fancier than they are. I would have been working in neuro ICU then on my last rotation as an IP, being rather naughty having painted nails at work!
20/11/13
Unfortunatly just tweets.
20/11/12
The mind of a 20 yr old new grad...
19/11/11
19/11/10
11 years ago....
23/11/10
23/11/08
20/11/07
Nothing even remotely birthday related! lol on any posts - either side of this date either.
19/11/06
Would have just finished 1st year uni...
I don't actually have time to read through these...
So many posts I'd like to write, so little time.
My brain has draw a blank. I'm blaming the baby for everything even though I don't think it's linked (then again, 1st trimester symptoms can be so vague (bloating, feeling shitty and lightheadedness) that sometimes you do think you're just losing the plot rather than it being pregnancy related)
I'm gonna use prompts this year cause rambling can be hard work.
1. How are you celebrating your birthday
Well on the actual day, I was working - they gave me a lovely ridiculously easy wardable patient 1:1 only for the fact that he had CPE (carbapenem producing enterobacteriaceae - the bacteria itself produces an enzyme that breaks down the antibiotics)which they really really really don't want being spread around so I was extra extra careful with handwashing and wearing those yellow gowns. He could easily be doubled but to reduce spread... My swap buddy, Lisa - had an ex? or current ANU professor who now has quiet severe and violent delirium which tends to swing both hypo and hyper active depending on what time of day it is (hyper at night and hypo during the day) - so that was some "don't go near him Rita just call for help) warnings which I heeded fairly well.
I've never been hit. 9 years. But that's mostly by luck and having forewarning each time I've had such pt-- I've not yet been the first one to discover someone was violently delirious. There's always someone that realises and reaction times will vary.
I informed people to wish me a happy birthday, and reminded them no cake since I can't have any.
Jomaline was really sweet. She remembered, and pre bought a bunch of sugar free treats from the pharmacy which I opened and shared with her cluster (which was opposite mine) with the warning - these are really good but they can give you diarrhea if you have too many ...
There's no such thing as a sweet treat without consequences of some kind.
On the Sunday I threw a BBQ. It's the usual backyard affair with too much food (that tasted surprisingly good) too much smoke (fuck I forgot how much smoke charcoal gives out and actually it poured rain (which is why I changed it from a Beach BBQ to the backyard at home since we have a covered area).
2. When you think about the last 12 months, what immediately comes to mind?
What a whirlwind of a year.
Both going very slowly (when your TTC and wondering when your single life will be over)
and very fast - covid rules literally changing on a daily basis and working in two different districts with different rules and protocols... Covid going all the way from being the WORST thing you can get to - once you and the majority are vaccinated the fear is muchly reduced and hey! let's all have BBQ and go to the shops and go to restaurants....
Vaccine passports (who'd have thunk that ever be a thing).
Friendships broken due to misguided views on vaccination -- large protests in the community against vaccination.
When you think the weirdest thing that can happen is Trump being president of USA-- things can get more interesting still.
3. What are you grateful for?
That I've had a ridiculously easy time conceiving (sure it took a year but come on, if that's the worst thing...) and hopefully despite all the mounting risk factors I get the NVB I'd like to have
(risk factors: age over 30, GDM, prinip) and if I don't get that, it's sorta like having a wedding go a different way to the way you planned. One day of your life. And as long as both parties are alive (and married), then the aftermath can always be dealt with.
4. What surprising change(s) took place in the last year?
Returning to ICU as a senior from casual once a week/once a month/being given only the easy patients -- funnily how fast that can deskill you -- to permanent full time senior -- was harder than I expect. There's been a few lumps and bumps.
When your trying, you never know when it'll work. Could be immediately, could take months... so that was a surprise too.
At least, for the most part, besides covid everything else was stable : financial. Housing. family (no one got sick or died)so that's a real blessing I think. It's nice to have stability amongst this mess (of covid, of changing back jobs out of midwifery) - this should also go in the what are you grateful for section really.
I was surprised with how much money I made despite not doing overtime -- don't get me wrong, I work a lot of extra shifts at SSH but they're mostly all shifts I wouldn't get as overtime anyway (morning shifts, basically, are extremely rarely given out as overtime) so I don't see it as a bad thing but rather a good thing - that I'm working more hours- paid only 10% extra - but they're el primo hours so why complain? Nurses, when they find good jobs, get paid rather well and have a moderate amount of stress in their jobs.
I'm mildly surprised so many people are leaving ICU. Other states pay better and have lower costs of living. If 120k is the top income for a floor nurse (like, not an educator, not a CNS or otherwise) but my living expenses were say, halved (for what we paid for this house you could have a beach side mansion in other parts of the country) then why would you stay in Sydney? People are choosing to retire now rather than say in 1 or 2 more years (or take their long service now and maybe rethink if they want to come back in 1.5 years).
5. What goals have you achieved in the last 12 months? Have you made progress on your Bucket List?
Having a baby was probably on that list that I haven't written down.
Transitioning back to ICU full time in general ICU was definitely something I wanted when I decided I really couldn't do midwifery full time.
Continuing to keep up with my hospital midwifery is another challenge that I think I've been managing well with.
I'm fairly competent at CRRT, which is nice.
6. What goals were you unsuccessful in reaching this year?
I should have put more effort into getting officially signed off for connecting and disconnecting someone onto a variety of CRRT circuit- but to be honest I don't feel completely confident about it as of yet. Troubleshooting could be better also.
Finally learning -- through trial and error -- how to set up those new ventilators we got and I did't get to use whilst I was a barely there casual.
I haven't cut any episiotomies so I haven't improved there either.
Any semblance of repairing old relationships I frequently think about (S) and wonder if it's worth bothering
7. Where have you stepped out of your comfort zone in the last year?
Moving to SSH as a new graduate has certainly been a challenge -- short lived as it was (4 months, 2 1 of which was probably more confusion and trying to give it a chance, 1 month of this is crap and 2 months of figuring out how to get out of there). I've learnt a lot about ... the system, about myself, about the stresses other health professions outside of ICU face... It's been an experience.
8. 8. What was challenging about the last year? There was a fair amount of uncertainty in my professional life (trying to transition back to ICU) which probably didn't help the uncertainty embedded in my personal life (TTC).
Especially after about 5 years of stability in neuro ICU I think it's been really good to get out of the comfort zone - because that's literally where nursing careers go to die.
And fortunately I had a good chunk of time there prior to mat leave: because returning after a whole year is definitely going to be a challenge (will I remember anything?!).
9. What was fun about the last year?
Having the whole house to ourselves. We stopped taking renters after our last - it's good money but the space and freedom is a blessing especially in covid. It's lovely.
10. What difficult problem or challenging situation is top of mind?
Just fears about the third trimester turning me into a monster. It's end of 2nd and I'm luckily not that big at all for 2nd (in comparison to the rest of me I can pass for chubby) - but the backache is already a major pain. I want to work until 38 weeks so...this won't be possible if things get unmanageable.
Sometimes I think about going into other (healthcare related professions) in order to get out of nightshift.
11. If you could speak to yourself 10 years ago, what would Younger You think about the problem above?
This probably reflects more in my work life. Built your pathophysiology knowledge. It'll always come in handy. Anyone can follow policy but it's more rewarding when you understand the details of what is going on. Keep saving. It's always held you in good steed.
Don't forget that you need to look your best - looks are important. (I think I often forget this one even now).
12. If you could speak to yourself 10 years from now, what would Older You say about the situation or problem?
You can always do better, but in general your basically doing fine.
13. What do you want your life to look like this time next year?
Oh geeze.
Health
Hope I can complete Oxfam successfully. That be cool. Maybe be back oc-ing or dragon boating. Don't know how those will go with a baby...
Career
I'd still be on mat leave and not thinking about work. That would be the goal, to not think about work for a whole year.
Business
Honestly.. worst business person ever ... me.
Financial
Hopefully there's even less of the mortgage to pay off. Once that's done... I want Pete to relax a little if he wants to. We could get somewhere bigger. Or not. Or renovate this place. Or not.
Home life and/or family
Hope the kid sleeps well and hasn't got too many issues breastfeeding. I hope to exclusively breastfeed whilst introducing solids into the first year.
Romantic relationships
Hopefully post baby the sex life will be ok...
Friends
This will be a challenge. I have no idea. I hope I have time for my single friends and don't discard them like old books.
Hobbies
I do miss being part of a team sport.
Lifestyle
Could be greener. More gardening.
Spiritual
Not quite sure with this one.
Personal development
I'm sure there will be plenty...
14. What could you do right away to make that vision a reality?
Take a chill pill. Things will be as they be.