Harder yet...
Well, I think that if I can make it through this, I can make it through anything. R came over last night. I did really well all through his time with the kids. Although it was really hard seeing him with them knowing he was going to leave after they went to bed. I did well through the discussion of lawyers and holidays. I was pretty proud of myself. Then he started packing things up. I couldn't hold it together anymore. Watching him go through things and deciding what to take and what to leave. It was like he was taking our house apart. We moved in there together. I thought if we ever left it would be together. I hate being just another statistic. I am trying to hold on to the thought that everything is going to be ok. It all still feels like a dream.