(no subject)
I first want to start this off by saying I'm sorry. I haven't been on lj much and I feel bad for neglecting the friends I have here. It always seems when things get really bad that this is where I turn, and its not fair to keep doing this without being there for others.
I really need to get my act together. I made a mistake after I told my friend that I would not be sending him money. After I sent that last email I basically stopped checking my email for a few weeks. I ran away instead of dealing with the problem that I should have, and afer a lot of stress from not checking it I went on today and looked. The last email I got was my friend saying that if he didn't get 50$ by tuesday that he would be deported. I got that email on the 18th. I'm still caught up feeling guilty from telling him I wouldn't send him anymore money, and hearing this just compounded the stress I was already under. It felt like I was developing ulcers. I sent him a reply saying I hoped that everything turned ou alright, and that I hadn't been on my email, but it just makes me feel like I'm sending empty words. There isn't anything I can really do if he did get deported, and I'm really expcting a nasty email to come my way soon.
Along with this I also have not scheduled enogh credits to be a full student at my university. I've kept putting off getting into a class which would put me into that status. I did finally send an email to the professor on sunday morning, but he hasn't replied yet, so I will go directly to the classroom with an add/drop sheet.
I feel better for facing my problems, but the only thing that has really gotten me through today so far is having my teddy bear in my backpack. I need to rest.
I really need to get my act together. I made a mistake after I told my friend that I would not be sending him money. After I sent that last email I basically stopped checking my email for a few weeks. I ran away instead of dealing with the problem that I should have, and afer a lot of stress from not checking it I went on today and looked. The last email I got was my friend saying that if he didn't get 50$ by tuesday that he would be deported. I got that email on the 18th. I'm still caught up feeling guilty from telling him I wouldn't send him anymore money, and hearing this just compounded the stress I was already under. It felt like I was developing ulcers. I sent him a reply saying I hoped that everything turned ou alright, and that I hadn't been on my email, but it just makes me feel like I'm sending empty words. There isn't anything I can really do if he did get deported, and I'm really expcting a nasty email to come my way soon.
Along with this I also have not scheduled enogh credits to be a full student at my university. I've kept putting off getting into a class which would put me into that status. I did finally send an email to the professor on sunday morning, but he hasn't replied yet, so I will go directly to the classroom with an add/drop sheet.
I feel better for facing my problems, but the only thing that has really gotten me through today so far is having my teddy bear in my backpack. I need to rest.