In which SPF 150+ sunblock meant nothing that weekend. [narration] [action] [text]
Truth be told, with all the strange happenings and unusual occurrences that frequented this school, Raiden forgot on a near daily basis he had originally been sent here to play spy and keep tabs on Solid Snake, per Patriot FOXHOUND Patriot Games "FOXHOUND" orders. Especially after encountering his Russian doppelganger from the past, he nearly all but forgotten it... And often wondered if it really meant anything anymore when he did remember...
However! Such a weekend trip with Nabooru out into the middle of the desert would provide yet another distraction from said wondering. Wait, out into the middle of the desert? How did he agree with that again?
"So how far are we from the horses?" The blonde asked from the driver's seat of his radioactive vomit green green convertible Lamborghini as it cruised down long roads, wind from the open top whipping through his hair.
"Not far. I'm not sure why you insisted on taking this car out anyway." They couldn't very well drive his car through sand, of course.
"Because it's mine and I like driving it." Of course.
"Or do you like driving me around in it?" Nabooru asked with a smile curling her lips as she reclined in the chair, her fiery hair also whipping around without a care in the breeze.
Raiden didn't reply which more or less meant yes, as would any self respecting guy with a car and an attractive woman sitting in the passenger seat of said car would want to do. He still felt a little guilty deep down this excursion was being done at the exclusion of Blacky and Rosemary and he might of kind of forgot to mention it either of them oops but he was confident nothing would come of this anyway. Then again that's exactly what he thought the first time him and Blacky went out together... better to just not think of that and drive. It wasn't terribly long before paved streets became dirt roads, dirt slowly became drier and sandier until they reached their destination. Well, the first one.
"There they are." A pair of exotic looking horses garbed in some exotic looking accessories, grazing on the last patch of grass in the shade of the last trees that overlooked a vast expanse of desert. Raiden scanned across the endless sea of sand, doubting he'd like this part of the journey as much as he did the over-all-but-too-soon driving part.
"Are you sure they can...?" Make it across without dying from heat exhaustion?
"Of course! They're Gerudo horses." Nabooru informed while he parked the car. "Those who have great skill in horseback riding and archery are well respected so we take care of our horses, and they take care of us." She paused. "You aren't scared, are you Raiden?"
I've never rode on a horse ever. "No." That wasn't in some VR simulation or a video game.
She didn't seem convinced and continued to smile confidently as she got on her horse, putting a sultry, eversoslightlysuggestive purr in her voice. "If you do get scared you can come ride with me."
"I'll remember that." He countered, trying to hide his frown and awkwardly but successfully hoisted himself on his own steed.
Once the horses and their passengers were loaded up, the trek across the sands was a hot, long, and grueling one. For someone like Raiden it was especially hot and long, and even SPF 150 sunblock could only do so much for his pale skin. The morning sun beat down relentlessly as it rose higher into the air, heating up the landscape and casting mirages pools everywhere in the distance. Who knew it'd be this far out? Who in their right mind would want to live out here? He'd soon find out as eventually the duo arrived safe and sound, not in a mirage but in Gerudo Valley and subsequently some kind of large, fortress hideout. Nabooru arrived to a warm welcome. Raiden arrived to the exact opposite; a swarm of women holding pointy, dangerous looking things at him and his horse asking equally pointy, dangerous sounding questions.
"He is under my jurisdiction." Nabooru explained with the finesses of a commander and held an arm in front of him. "You are to leave Raiden alone."
The other women looked at each other, muttering things Raiden couldn't quite make out. He could of sworn one of them sounded something like, "How are you so sure he's a guy?" but it must of been his imagination. Eventually the women backed up and allowed them to pass.
"What was that all about?"
"Men are forbidden." Nabooru said calmly as their horses proceeded onward.
"What?!" That would have been really useful to know beforehand.
"To be fair, we don't allow just anybody to just waltz in here, but males are exceptionally rare. Only one is born every one hundred years."
Raiden hadn't been intending to blurt it out the first thing that came to his mind but before he knew it the words were already tumbling out of his mouth. "He must get around..."
And Nabooru would only further add to his embarrassment by grinning and agreeing. "He does."
From there, she acted as a very informative guide and lead Raiden over to the archery range. She insisted on showing him how to at least hold a bow properly. For his own benefit, you see. Raiden did take a little pride in getting a few bulls-eye's, but trying to do it from a moving horse it was no easy task. When it was Nabooru's turn to show off he silently marveled and how effortlessly she hit each and every target without fail, her arrows flying through the air with the same kind of confidence and pride she radiated naturally. She made it look so easy! After that, she lead Raiden around the rest of the fortress, taking care not to show him too much as he started to get rather curious about all the weaponry and fighting techniques the Gerudo used and the heritage behind it. Some things were better left a surprise.
"Aren't you getting hungry?" It'd be something of a late lunch today.
"Yeah. What's on the menu?" Hopefully not rations...
"Maybe you."
He stared. She laughed. He was so easy.
"Would you object to a picnic at the Desert Colossus?" How could he?
"Where's that?" And most importantly, did it have shade?
When they arrived to said Desert Colossus, two features were immediately noticeable; a tiny oasis that looked like it was on the verge of drying up but still managed to hold a tiny amount of water somehow, and a giant monument that seeped into the sands. In the front of it was the statue of a woman with outstretched arms. She seemed to be guarding the entrance to something, possibly a temple of some kind. "What is that?" Raiden asked.
"This is the Goddess of the Sand."
"Goddess of the Sand?"
"She watches over us Gerudo." Nabooru staked out a comfortable looking patch of sandy, shady grass and quickly situated a picnic. "If you'll excuse me Raiden, I'll be right back. Help yourself to some food. I'll be quick." Raiden nodded as she excused herself. He wanted to wait but it was getting late in the day and he was hungry. It might of been hot out still, but it was significantly cooler in the shade of the temple, and Nabooru had packed some fine food. Did she make it herself? He'd have to thank her later. Speaking of making herself, she presented Raiden with a gift.
"Hold still."
"What are you...?" Nabooru sneaked up behind him without permission and clipped something around his neck. It was a doggy collar.
"There." He looked at his new piece of jewelry. A fine gold chain with a pendant at the end, and one of the gems from her forehead piece seemed to be mysteriously missing. Raiden looked quizzically at her, as if he didn't understand what he did to deserve it.
"Think of it as something to remember me by." She winked.
In favor of keeping the topic of conversation off him, he looked back to the mammoth statue. "What were you doing before? By the statue."
"Praying to my goddess. I've been meaning to do it for a while. I think this was something I sorely missed, and I'm glad I came."
"The sunlight thing, huh?" He asked with half a mouth-full.
"What about you, Raiden?"
He swallowed and gave her a look. "What about me?"
"Do you pray to any gods?"
"I doubt they listen when I do."
"So. You do it just because...?"
He didn't particularly like where this topic of conversation was going. "What else would I do?"
"Believe in something?" There was something about her smirk and the way she asked that made him simultaneously uneasy and vulnerable. It wasn't a trademark Blacky Grin but something close enough. Made him think about things he didn't really want to think about, things as deep as the darkening sky around them. So he conveniently stuffed his mouth with the last of his sandwich. When she wasn't looking though, he focused back on the pendant he gave her and frowned.
"...Yeah."
But...
The trip back wasn't quite so bad.
[SO last weekend Raiden came back looking very very tan. Even now, he is probably still rather tan. If anyone asked about it BLACKY he explained he had OFFICIAL BUSINESS with the Geurdo and left it at that. Come on Blacky, he totally brought you back a sweet souvenir that he probably got driving on the way back oops. Speaking of souvenirs, probably not as noticeable as the tan, Raiden is also brandishing a very pretty sparkly shiny new gold necklace with a gem pendant. It usually stays tucked under his shirt and out of sight, but if asked about that, he'll innocently explain Nabs did indeed make it for him and that he thinks it looks a hell of a lot nicer than the dog tags. Which he can't seem to part with for some reason keeps under his pillow now. He is also COMPLETELY. COMPLETELY TOTALLY UNAWARE OF WHAT ALL THIS HAS CAUSED. Otherwise he has been trying not to think too hard about all the TIME PARADOXES happening lately, so business as usual with Janitorman.]
[Private to Raikov; hackable]
You. Me. DNA clinic, this weekend. Got it memorized?
[Private to Blacky; hackable]
Once my car's cleaned we're going to the clinic to solve this mystery. They said they can't detail it or repaint it until every speck of sand has been washed out. Can you believe that? ...Did you still want to come? Please don't let me go alone with that guy.
[Private to Lash; hackable]
You know, I can't believe I never realized it until now but the sword I got... this is a high frequency blade. I've been using it to shave my non-existent beard. You said you got this from Kanbei, right? Did he put this stupid talking socks thing curse on it make it himself?
[Also. TodayYesterday Friday, Raiden can be seen washing his car in the parking lot. And while Raiden was washing said car he ACCIDENTALLY got some douchebag's giant blue taking up two parking-spaces-fancy-race-car covered in sandy, dirty suds. ALL OVER. It's a complete accident, completely totally unintentional in every way, yep. Totally.]
This might be a strange question but... if you're a Pokemon, what's it like being inside a pokeball...? It doesn't hurt or anything, does it?