(no subject)
i am ready to die!
i am sick and finished with my life, i do not hink i go tolerate another day in my shoes. I have the most unset gut feeling in my stomach right now and have not stopped shaking since i got up this morning. I planned out the most perfect weeknd for jarrod and i. He is leaving to go away to camp for 5 weeks. I havnt seen him since thursday and that wasn't even suppose to happen. He decided instead of spending his last weeknd with him to go up to disney with his friend who he is going to camp with. Then i took off an entire day of work just to be with him, i call him this morning to see if i coould come over b/c he was suppose to get home early this morning or las t last night, he is still sleeping...IN ORLANDO!!! im not going to see him today....or before he goes to camp!! so now its 6 weeks. im going to kill myself i cant take it any more!! I hate me i hate everything. All i want to do is be with my baby!! But he would rather be with his friends. i havnt stopped crying since last night i even cried in my sleep, im shaking to hysteria right now i dont even know how i'm typing but i am. I now im just venting right now and im not going to actually kill myself but gee i wish i could just disapeer for awhile. I dont think anybody would notice.
i am sick and finished with my life, i do not hink i go tolerate another day in my shoes. I have the most unset gut feeling in my stomach right now and have not stopped shaking since i got up this morning. I planned out the most perfect weeknd for jarrod and i. He is leaving to go away to camp for 5 weeks. I havnt seen him since thursday and that wasn't even suppose to happen. He decided instead of spending his last weeknd with him to go up to disney with his friend who he is going to camp with. Then i took off an entire day of work just to be with him, i call him this morning to see if i coould come over b/c he was suppose to get home early this morning or las t last night, he is still sleeping...IN ORLANDO!!! im not going to see him today....or before he goes to camp!! so now its 6 weeks. im going to kill myself i cant take it any more!! I hate me i hate everything. All i want to do is be with my baby!! But he would rather be with his friends. i havnt stopped crying since last night i even cried in my sleep, im shaking to hysteria right now i dont even know how i'm typing but i am. I now im just venting right now and im not going to actually kill myself but gee i wish i could just disapeer for awhile. I dont think anybody would notice.