(no subject)
You know....it's frustrating. The more I'm out here in Oregon the more I get aquainted with the idea I'm never gonna leave. Then suddenly my heart sinks. Soo, why do I stay out here when all I wish for is to leave? The truth is my most major drawback is that during the Fall when the thought of going to BYU felt so right that I couldn't shake it. Well, I couldn't ignore that feeling or shake it and it's still affecting me now. This nursing school thing is becoming quite the long and rather crazy journey. One option would be to apply to school now and go in the Fall...great, BUT I haven't gone to institute in way too long and have no one to write my recommendation. Beyond that I'm taking all the classes I can out here while it's cheap that I'm leaving almost nothing come Fall. Another option is to start taking institute apply for Winter Term...great also, but Winter I'll be apply to schools anyways. What classes am I to take in the mean time? What a waste it would be if I'm just planning on moving the following Fall to wherever I'm accepted? Why do I make it so complicated? Why did I have to have that feeling that BYU was the school for me?
Of course my parents as always without fail are pushing me to stay at home. So I'm okay with that...I'm beginning to completely love being at home. Yet, what the bishop said and my love for independence...my patience to get that back is running thin. I guess it comes down to asking how thin? How willing am I to move more than once? What do I want to do? I just keep hoping time will tell, but at what point am I just letting time govern my life and I'm not taking charge of my own life? All there are are a million questions and absolutely no answers. Just as I think I have answers I go back into the unknown. One answer that still sticks...is that I want to be a nurse and am going to get there. I just need more answers to come....especially if I should start looking at colleges to apply to.
Of course my parents as always without fail are pushing me to stay at home. So I'm okay with that...I'm beginning to completely love being at home. Yet, what the bishop said and my love for independence...my patience to get that back is running thin. I guess it comes down to asking how thin? How willing am I to move more than once? What do I want to do? I just keep hoping time will tell, but at what point am I just letting time govern my life and I'm not taking charge of my own life? All there are are a million questions and absolutely no answers. Just as I think I have answers I go back into the unknown. One answer that still sticks...is that I want to be a nurse and am going to get there. I just need more answers to come....especially if I should start looking at colleges to apply to.