Joan's Last Moments
Ok, I'm going to try to get through this...
I'm currently at my uncle's place helping get ready for the funeral, spending time with family, and all that associated stuff. Last night, John talked about the last moment's of Joan's life. Clearly, he's trying to work through the process. Here's the account:
The day before her death, Joan had spent the day shopping with her mother and other stuff like that. She and John went to bed and read together. At the same time, they both turned off the lights, cuddled, and fell asleep. Some time around 1:00, John woke up to Joan "snoring." She snored, but it never woke him up previously. He poked her and told her to roll over -there was no reaction. Sensing something wasn't quite right, John turned on the lights and immediately knew something was terribly wrong.
John was in the fire department for 20-ish years so old habits kicked in immediately. He pulled her off the bed and began CPR and all of that stuff. He called 911 and asked for an ambulance to be sent. The operator tried to keep him on the line (as they always try to do) at which point he told them he was a retired fire fighter and had worked the emergency response team - he was going to go back and continue trying to resusitate her.
He mentioned that, as most people know during a situation like this, the emergency response team will often apply pressure to pain centers to, basically, test if the person is still alive. He was saying that, on a stranger, this is easy to do but he had a hard time doing it to Joan - he was afriad to hurt her, but that was the point...
He got no response...
Jimmy, his son, was running up the stairs to help and then being ordered to go back down the stairs to wait for the ambulance - John did not want Jimmy's last image of his mother to be John pumping her chest, trying to keep her alive.
The ambulance arrived and, normally, they would usher out family members and begin their jobs. Knowing that John was a retired fire fighter, they left him doing compressions and began hooking up IVs and installing breathing aids and all that stuff. They then took Joan away in the ambulance. John did not ride in the ambulance because he knew, from his past, that having a family member riding in the jump seat was often just a body in the way and he wanted to give the crew all the space they needed to do their job.
The level 3 response member, who is the only member of the team certified to proclaim death on-site, told John "I'm getting flatline - I'm sure you know what that means."
He knew.
He had known since it all began.
With Joan gone, the police began locking up the bedroom as a potential crime scene. When someone that young (47) dies, they have to investigate it just in case it was due to unnatural causes. John wasn't even allowed in to get some clothes to head off to the hospital. John had the typically mixed emotions of knowing that they were doing their jobs as they had to do but also furious that he was being considered as a criminal. Anyhow, he headed off to the hospital with Sheldon, his best friend, driving.
Jimmy and Coleen (Sheldon's wife) remained behind, answering police questions. One of the police hadn't turned his radio off - just turned it down. The "failure to revive" call came over the radio. That's how Jimmy found out his mother had died.
The autopsy discovered that Joan died of a brain anurism. She died in her sleep and almost certainly died instantaneously. Given the circumstances, that's the best anyone could ask for.
The sound that woke John was Joan's last breath.
Call your family. Tell them you love them.
I'm currently at my uncle's place helping get ready for the funeral, spending time with family, and all that associated stuff. Last night, John talked about the last moment's of Joan's life. Clearly, he's trying to work through the process. Here's the account:
The day before her death, Joan had spent the day shopping with her mother and other stuff like that. She and John went to bed and read together. At the same time, they both turned off the lights, cuddled, and fell asleep. Some time around 1:00, John woke up to Joan "snoring." She snored, but it never woke him up previously. He poked her and told her to roll over -there was no reaction. Sensing something wasn't quite right, John turned on the lights and immediately knew something was terribly wrong.
John was in the fire department for 20-ish years so old habits kicked in immediately. He pulled her off the bed and began CPR and all of that stuff. He called 911 and asked for an ambulance to be sent. The operator tried to keep him on the line (as they always try to do) at which point he told them he was a retired fire fighter and had worked the emergency response team - he was going to go back and continue trying to resusitate her.
He mentioned that, as most people know during a situation like this, the emergency response team will often apply pressure to pain centers to, basically, test if the person is still alive. He was saying that, on a stranger, this is easy to do but he had a hard time doing it to Joan - he was afriad to hurt her, but that was the point...
He got no response...
Jimmy, his son, was running up the stairs to help and then being ordered to go back down the stairs to wait for the ambulance - John did not want Jimmy's last image of his mother to be John pumping her chest, trying to keep her alive.
The ambulance arrived and, normally, they would usher out family members and begin their jobs. Knowing that John was a retired fire fighter, they left him doing compressions and began hooking up IVs and installing breathing aids and all that stuff. They then took Joan away in the ambulance. John did not ride in the ambulance because he knew, from his past, that having a family member riding in the jump seat was often just a body in the way and he wanted to give the crew all the space they needed to do their job.
The level 3 response member, who is the only member of the team certified to proclaim death on-site, told John "I'm getting flatline - I'm sure you know what that means."
He knew.
He had known since it all began.
With Joan gone, the police began locking up the bedroom as a potential crime scene. When someone that young (47) dies, they have to investigate it just in case it was due to unnatural causes. John wasn't even allowed in to get some clothes to head off to the hospital. John had the typically mixed emotions of knowing that they were doing their jobs as they had to do but also furious that he was being considered as a criminal. Anyhow, he headed off to the hospital with Sheldon, his best friend, driving.
Jimmy and Coleen (Sheldon's wife) remained behind, answering police questions. One of the police hadn't turned his radio off - just turned it down. The "failure to revive" call came over the radio. That's how Jimmy found out his mother had died.
The autopsy discovered that Joan died of a brain anurism. She died in her sleep and almost certainly died instantaneously. Given the circumstances, that's the best anyone could ask for.
The sound that woke John was Joan's last breath.
Call your family. Tell them you love them.