Fade to black
Title: Fade to black
Pairing: main!Daehyun, Daehyun/Junhong
Rating: G
Length: 766 words
Summary: Every breath has got Daehyun on the borderline of being tired.
[a/n: This was written in 22 October, 2014 and I think I wrote this as an outlet because I was reflective about bap. I don't think I wrote this thinking about bap vs their company since this was before that time? Or maybe I did and I really don't remember.]
The feeling of tiredness could be formed from just about anything. Physically, mentally, socially.
That's exactly what Daehyun is feeling.
Tired of everything.
He was physically tired from the never ending parade of concerts, but he never felt the deep feeling of it in his heart until it was all over. When the final encore came, and the last goodbye was waved to the fans, suddenly all the euphoria he was always expecting churned and spiraled into a cloud of tiredness floating about him all the time. At times, he breathed with only the small bits of it entering his system and refusing to go out. Whenever this happened, his insides felt like they were getting weighed down. His whole body felt like a clunk of thrown away pieces in the corner, not needed anymore.
As days passed by, more tiredness collected into the pit of his stomach and invaded his thoughts. So dominant was it, that it seemed as if it would never leave his body. It wasn't tangible like play dough where it could be molded and formed into however it would be used. It was like as much as he tried to breathe it out through attempting to train his mind that he was already used to it.
(Except as Daehyun tried more and more, he then realised that the tired he felt in the late night practices as a trainee were different to now. Now, with the goal achieved along with people in Korea and international fans of him, he just felt tired. Weird tired, like he wasn't sure what was happening right now.)
Daehyun's sneakers screech on top of the floorboards as he stood and walked to the door. The recording studio's quiet was scratching at Daehyun's mind as he tried to fill it with different music in the air. He walked down the corridor, on the way to the elevator. Already, he was planning in his head the different things he should do when he arrived home.
Daehyun conjured up the list for the night; Eat dinner, put Junhong's sheets in his room and go to sleep before 12am.
The whurring sound from the heater welcomed Daehyun to the dorm while he toed his shoes off.
"Hyung, is that you?" Junhong says, yelling from the couch. Junhong is lying on his side, with his head propped on his hand and his legs spread haphazardly all over the couch. He flicks his eyes from the television to look at Daehyun's dark brown eyes and pairs it with a smile.
"Hey," Daehyun greets, giving a high five to Junhong's opposite hand. He grins slightly as Junhong wriggles his eyebrows.
"My birthday is coming up soon," Junhong says.
"I know, I saw a birthday banner up at the station for you today," Daehyun smiles.
"Did you take the train today?" Junhong says, shifting his weight. He looks much more interested now.
"I wish I," Daehyun pauses. "No, I didn't. I saw it while passing by the station on the way to the studio."
"It's been so long since I've been on the subway," Junhong says.
"Same, same," Daehyun agrees. It must have been years since he did last buy at ticket and hop on an overcrowded carriage of a train. The last time must have been when he filmed a reality show or on his way to the practice rooms.
"Anyway, do you have a present for me hyung?" Junhong is on his knees now and looks at him with sparkling eyes.
"Not yet," Daehyun laughs.
He walks to the kitchen and rummages through the near empty fridge. There's milk, eggs and a container of kimchi but he's pretty sure it's been there since the last holiday three months ago. He slams the door shut and makes his way to grab packets of ramen.
"Have you eaten dinner yet?" Daehyun asks.
"No, I didn't. I ate too much snacks today," Junhong moans.
Daehyun makes a sound of acknowledgement then makes a grab for two more packets.
"What did you do today?" Daehyun asks. He stirs the pot.
"Had breakfast then was in the practice room with Jongup hyung," Junhong says, shrugging his shoulders. "I came back just before and I'm continuing this one piece episode."
Daehyun grunts. He concentrates in making sure that the powder in the packet doesn't spill all over the stove like the last time he did this.
"I was in the recording studio today," Daehyun says simply.
"Can I come in and listen to you next time hyung?" Junhong asks.
"Sure," Daehyun says.
He feels a little better now.