so messed up
so last wednesday i went home to barrie to see my rents and take a course i need for work. it was a good trip home for once. altho i ended up leaving more confused on so many levels.
i found out my dad might have prostate cancer, hes gone for tests and so far all they can tell him is that his pancreas is enlarged and he has scarring on his liver. when i was younger we had a family friend who was my best friend. she went on a trip and had to come home early because she was sick, and it turned out to be cancer in her pancreas and she died soon after because it was so advanced. so now thats running in the back of mind along with the fact that my dad's dad had prostate cancer and it was really bad, he had internal bleeding and the works and was in the hospital and had to get blood transfusions and everything. and of course my dad is the type of guy to not tell anyone, my mom found out by a requisition on his desk and i found out by a msg on the answering machine.
so now im pissing myself because i dont know whats going on and neither do either of my rents and my mom told me to act like i dont know around him because she wasnt supposed to tell me anything. so i have to act like everything is alright! talk about messed up!
he wont even know until like late august, hes got a CT scan to go to then and its the earliest time he can even get in to have the scan done!
but i did have a good night on sat night, went over to Cassies place and hung out and watched tv and stuff, it was really nice to finally get to hang out with her, i cant wait until the next tie im home so i can see her again. should be good times!
i found out my dad might have prostate cancer, hes gone for tests and so far all they can tell him is that his pancreas is enlarged and he has scarring on his liver. when i was younger we had a family friend who was my best friend. she went on a trip and had to come home early because she was sick, and it turned out to be cancer in her pancreas and she died soon after because it was so advanced. so now thats running in the back of mind along with the fact that my dad's dad had prostate cancer and it was really bad, he had internal bleeding and the works and was in the hospital and had to get blood transfusions and everything. and of course my dad is the type of guy to not tell anyone, my mom found out by a requisition on his desk and i found out by a msg on the answering machine.
so now im pissing myself because i dont know whats going on and neither do either of my rents and my mom told me to act like i dont know around him because she wasnt supposed to tell me anything. so i have to act like everything is alright! talk about messed up!
he wont even know until like late august, hes got a CT scan to go to then and its the earliest time he can even get in to have the scan done!
but i did have a good night on sat night, went over to Cassies place and hung out and watched tv and stuff, it was really nice to finally get to hang out with her, i cant wait until the next tie im home so i can see her again. should be good times!