Giant Post exploring the indside of Erin's brain

[whimsicalwoo]

Well, it's official, I'm back to 200 lbs. Technically the highest weight I've ever achieved has been 203, back when I started university in the fall of 2005, but who's counting, right? Well, haha, I am actually

Comments

[archica]

I understand a lot about the weight issue. Currently, I am the biggest I've ever been in my life (won't give a number on my weight, but let's just say it's a little more than yours and I'm a little shorter than you ;.;) and I just feel terrible about it. I feel that I carry my weight well (everyone who knows how much I weight seems genuinely shocked when I tell them, and even mom who is brutally honest when telling me how I look says I look quite a bit smaller than my weight suggests), but I'm still very much a "fat girl". I still keep myself up. I fix my hair, wear makeup, try to be fashionable, etc. But sometimes I just feel like "What's the point? I'm fat and no amount of makeup is going to change that

[whimsicalwoo]

Maaaan, I am so sorry I didn't get to your comment until now! I wanted to have a thoughtful response to it and I just finished a Homework Week from Hell so unfortunately I wasn't feeling very thoughtful. Sorry! ^^;

Yeah, I've seen a picture of you and I think you do 'carry' your weight well. I think we're both lucky in that the extra fat we do have, is pretty well dispersed over our entire body--yay! Not exactly something to celebrate, but I've always been grateful that I didn't carry all my weight in one specific area of my body, like a huge upper body with skinny little legs or vice versa.

But sometimes I just feel like "What's the point? I'm fat and no amount of makeup is going to change that."And it's sad that this is what our society teaches young girls. I can relate to this. I used to unconsciously think like this a lot and it didn't help that I was under the delusion that I could lose the weight really fast if I wanted to. And THEN I could look decent. It was like: "I can quit any time I want!" I feel like an alcoholic

[whimsicalwoo]

Yes, there is a HUGE fat stigma in our society, especially among the high school age group. I find it sad and ridiculous because so much emphasis is placed on physical appearance as part of your status and you are usually valued more if you're beautiful. And then you're judged for being fat because that's something you can control and fat people are just inherently lazy. First of all, many people who appear fat or who are by societal standards, are not--that's just their body type. Many receive it genetically and are actually quite healthy and in good shape. People never stop to think that some people are genetically skinny and can die from high blood pressure from a diet high in fats and lack of exercise too. -_-; And also, overeating and eating too many foods high in fat is a flaw. People who judge fat people because of this 'flaw' are completely ignoring the fact that everyone has a vice or an unhealthy flaw. Some of them just aren't as visible. It's called being a hypocrite. And unless you've taken a walk in our shoes, you can't

[rincebrain]

i don't really know what to say to all of this

too many words and my life has been too hectic recently

so let me just say that i'm pleased that you're not unhappy with yourself

and you're not the first friend of mine who's wished they were a lesbian

[whimsicalwoo]

Therefore, you get no love. Just kidding. ^_~ If any of your friends are ever feeling down on themselves because they think they are a fat 'lump-of-lard,' direct them to this post and maybe it will cheer them up! :D

Also, yes, I hope that someday I can experience both kinds of romantic relationship. Although I don't want to hurt anyone if it turns out I'm not bi, so I will be very, very careful. ;)

Hey!

[whimsicalwoo]

Hey there!! No, no, no--I do not find your random comment creepy at all! In fact I love it! That is how Rich and I met, actually, and somehow we've kept in regular contact for over four years now since I live in Canada. Ours is the Internet friendship that just won't die and it's all based on me randomly stalking him to his journal because he was a friend of a friend of mine. ^_~

So as you can see, I'm a bit of a stalker too. I think sites like Facebook and Livejournal turn us all into amateur stalkers and voyeurs, anyway. ;D So thank you very much for *your* lovely comment because it's nice to know that I can help promote developing a healthy body image in the face of so much social and peer pressure. I bought a copy of US magazine the other day (because I needed something to read other than Old English while I was on campus all day once) and it had this stupid cover story about some sport star's wife who's trying to lose weight after having a baby and all the article talked about was how disgusting she felt with an extra 30 pounds

Re: Hey!

[whimsicalwoo]

Hey! You know, I started my reply to this reply last week, then started rambling, then got kicked out the library so I saved my half-written response, then got attacked by essays and assignments, and realize that I now won't be able to respond to this until Friday. XD Jeez, me and my terrible procrastination...

But I just wanted to let you know that I WOULD LOVE TO ADD YOU AS A FRIEND!! I think I'm too shy and worried about offending people sometimes, because I was going to ask you if I could too! ^_~ Good luck with end-of-term stress! My term ends Dec. 3 and exams start Dec. 7, ick, nooooooo!