Why I shouldn't give anyone advice about their love life.
* Tholomyes is now known as Sibyl-Vane
[Basil] *very quietly slips out of the kitchen and goes to sit on a couch in a corner of the main room*
[Sibyl-Vane] *comes in quietly and unobtrusively, glancing quickly about the room*
[Basil] *is sitting around trying not to twitch on a couch*
[Wotton] No, we never did. But you didn't hate me, then . . . not that I know, anyway, and if you did I don't want to know.
[Dorian] I love you.
[Dorian] But I can't stand you...not anymore..
[Sibyl-Vane] *stands for a moment, silently eyeing the Dorian/Wotton interaction ((unless they're not in main room?)), before moving, with a slight sigh, nearer to Basil*
[Basil] *doesn't even notice Sybil*
[Sibyl-Vane] ((Ignore the bit about Dorian & Wotton, then. Turn it into ... "doesn't see Dorian" or something.))
[Basil] *insert bounds of mind-blowing angst and self-hatred here. you can feel this stuff radiating from him*
[Wotton] Can't you? *rests his head on Dorian's shoulder* I'm afraid I must do something absolutely dreadful, then. I've got to ask you to -try-, you see, because I can't stand it if you don't.
[Sibyl-Vane] *feels the radiation, but, maybe foolishly, approaches him nonetheless* Mr. Hallward...sir?
[Basil] *looks us blearily* ...Ms. Vane. ...hello. *rubs at eyes*
[Dorian] *buries his face in his hands* I've tried....I try...and I want to make you happy, but haven't been -- *voice breaks*
[Sibyl-Vane] I'm so sorry to bother you, sir, but... ...but I was wondering if you'd seen Do--Mr. Gray about tonight.
[Basil] ...oh, rather. *is shaking liek you wouldn't believe* I don't think he wants to be bothered at the moment.
[Sibyl-Vane] ...... *quietly* Is he with Lord Henry Wotton?
[Basil] 'With' being a vague and relative term, you could say that. *looks exceedingly guilty*
[Wotton] But I -was- happy, before this mess, and if . . . I can be, again, if you . . . if we're all right, you see? Or if we can try to be.
[Sibyl-Vane] *winces* ....I didn't mean it quite like that. *pauses* May I sit down?
[Dorian] *pulls away and keeps his face in his hands* ....I'm not presentable right now... I don't want to think about what we must do, or what has been done, right now.. I want to go.
[Basil] ..I didn't mean it quite like that either. *tries to uncurl himself from a ball-like state* Of course you may sit.
[Wotton] Please, don't go.
[Wotton] And don't worry about looking -presentable.- You always do, and better, still.
[Dorian] *muffled* I don't want to have to see you.
[Wotton] *WOUNDED,omg* Dorian . . .
[Dorian] *pauses* What is it...?
[Sibyl-Vane] *sits down on the edge of the couch, a bit uncomfortable* ....are you... are you all right, sir?
[Basil] *weak laugh* All right? I am many things at the moment, but all right is not one of them.
[Sibyl-Vane] *concerned* What's wrong? ...right now?
[Basil] ...oh, I've just done something absolutely horrible, is all. *hugs knees*
[Wotton] I don't want you to go. If you want to, I'll let you-- I couldn't help but do so-- but I wish you'd stay.
[Wotton] And I -do- love you, and I -am- sorry, and I -don't- want this to be the end, so . . .
[Dorian] I can't do anything.... I don't want to be miserable, in this miserable place, with you here....
[Sibyl-Vane] I'm sure it wasn't...well, what... what did you do? If I'm not being too nosy.
[Basil] ....Har-- Lord Henry and I were speaking about.. things. And we got a little bit... *swallows* ..carried away.
[Wotton] *nods, MISERABLY, of course* All right. All right. Whatever pleases you. Or . . . hurts you less, at least.
[Dorian] *stifles another sob* Good night. Say good night to Basil for me.
[Sibyl-Vane] .....did you...? No, I...I don't need to know. I'm sorry.
[Wotton] . . . I don't know if can, just now. I think I'd rather not see him.
[Wotton] . . . but if it's what you want, I will.
[Dorian] *wavering laugh* Why..? You seemed to like his company more than you like mine...
[Basil] ...we rather did. And then, well, Dorian came in . And saw us. .....I think you can imagine it didn't go well from there. *puts head down* And now I feel absolutely... unbelievably horrible.
[Wotton] *hugs him, again* No. No, I don't.
[Dorian] *pulls away* Stop....
[Sibyl-Vane] *touches him tentatively on the arm* Please don't. Not that it's really any of my business at all, but I don't think you... have any cause for it. And I hate to see you - to see anyone - so miserable.
[Wotton] *flinches* . . . if it's what you want. I'm sorry. *hollowly* I always wanted to show you the good things about life, you know. I didn't want to bring in all of the . .. the -misery-, too.
[Dorian] You did....you did....I had a lot of fun..
[Wotton] . . . and now?
[Dorian] ...This isn't very fun..
[Wotton] No. No, it isn't.
[Basil] ...but it's my fault, you see. *starting to cry about here* They're both in there, Dorian's miserable, Harry's miserable, and I don't know how it can end well, and it's -my fault.- I could have done something, said something, but I didn't.
[Wotton] And it oughtn't end like this. I don't want it to end at all, but if that's what you want then it ought to be -better- than this.
[Dorian] ....*takes his hands a bit away from his face* ....I love you.
[Sibyl-Vane] *helplessly* Don't be too hard on yourself, sir, I'm sure... I'm sure things will...work out all right. Somehow.
[Wotton] then . . . isn't it worth trying?
[Dorian] How do I know...? I'm so tired of being miserable..
[Dorian] ...Good night.
[Basil] ..but it doesn't matter how they work out, you know. I feel horrible because of the pain I caused for them, but... I feel worse because... *very quietly* I don't know if I want it turn out all right for them. *deep breath* It's horrible. I want them to be happy, but there's just something nagging me about it. I've never felt this guilty in my life. *sniffles*
[Wotton] *smallvoice* I'm tired of it, too. Good night, then.
[Wotton] . .. but not . .. not goodbye? *dimly hopeful!*
[Dorian] *small smile* ...I can't stand you.
[Dorian] ..I wish I could tear myself from you...
[Dorian] ...But I can't. I don't want to.
[Sibyl-Vane] *is silent for a rather long moment, before softly speaking again* If you are guilty for feeling that way, then I must share your burden; I confess, though I only wish for people to be happy, I would... that he were happy with - with _me_.
[Wotton] Then it's a dreadful situation you're in, isn't it? I suppose I should be glad that it's simpler for me. I only want to mend things, and don't know how.
[Dorian] If you could smile...that -smile-....that you never smile at me anymore... But good night..
[Dorian] *touches Henry's sleeve lightly and leaves*
* Dorian has left #desperatefans
[Wotton] *sinks down with his back against the wall* . . . oh, god.
[Basil] ....*wipes tears on shirtsleeve* ....that's what it is, that's right... I hate feeling like this, it feels like a betrayal. I want Dorian to be happy, yes, and I certainly want Harry to be happy, but... *speaking quickly and brokenly* ..there was a moment--just one little moment--- When he was kissing me and I felt--- I don't know what I felt but---I want to feel it again. *slumps*
[Wotton] *handsoverface* . . . . . . . . .ohgod
[Sibyl-Vane] *looks down at her hands in her lap, biting her lower lip* You feel like the world has stopped turning, and nothing else could possibly move, while you're suspended in the most perfect, almost holy, moment of your life.
[Basil] ....I... *blink* ..I guess... ...that's bad, isn't it.
[Sibyl-Vane] *gives a very small, rather wobbly smile* I suppose so. I'm sorry, I don't think I should have said that.
[Basil] ..no, no. It's all right. I doubt I could feel worse if I tried... this is ridiculous. *tries to sink into the couch, apparently*
[Wotton] *in the kitchen, tries to sink into the wall*
[Sibyl-Vane] It is not, it's -not- ridiculous. Or if it is, then so am I, and I hope I'm not, so I hope you aren't, either. ...do you love him? Are you in love with him?
[Basil] ....*goggles* ...I ... I don't know.. that is.. I -shouldn't- be.... .I mean... *flails with all mighty flailage powers*
[Sibyl-Vane] *ducks flailing limbs* *sort of* Shouldn't doesn't make any difference, I'd say.
[Basil] ...but... oh, I just don't -know- anymore. ...but it doesn't matter. Harry'll be happy with Dorian, and that's the point, isn't it? That's what I helped them accomplish before. There's no reason for me to want anything different. *mostly talking to himself*
[Sibyl-Vane] *with a vaguely troubled, slightly unhappy expression and tone* If they -are- happy together. I may not know much about the ... situation, but I've rather received the impression that Dorian... that Lord Henry is the only person with the power to make Dorian cry.
[Basil] ...I think that's right. ...when I left them, of course, they were anything but happy.. I didn't want to say anything, because I probably would have made it worse...
[Grantaire] *laughs* It's rather a hard habit to break, monsieur, and to tell you the truth, I don't really want to.
[Wotton] *COULD HAVE USED SOME HELP, YO*
[Basil] *COULD BARELY STAND UP, FOO'*
[Wotton] *. . . POINT TAKEN*
[Basil] *... THANK YOU*
[Sibyl-Vane] I don't think you could have made anything worse. Not if the way Dorian was acting the other night is any -- oh, er, well. *blushes a bit* Ishouldn'tgossip. ...where...where -are- they, now, sir?
[Basil] ...Dorian has left, I believe, and Harry.. he's in the kitchen. *extreme, radiating guilt*
[Sibyl-Vane] ...alone?
[Basil] ...I think so.
[Sibyl-Vane] *gaze is drawn, inexorably, to the kitchen door* .....perhaps you... no, maybe not.
[Basil] ....*hollow gaze* I doubt he ever wants to see me again, after that. *heavy sigh*
[Sibyl-Vane] ...would it be too much of a cliche to say 'you never know until you try'? *weak smile*
[Basil] ....I don't know if I would be able to try. ...I'mscared. Ohgod, heprobablyhatesmenow. *doesn't start crying again, but just barely*
[Sibyl-Vane] *starts to put her hand back on his arm, then stops, drawing it back awkwardly* I... I'm sorry. I'm -sorry-. I wish I could think of something to say, or do, that would help...
[Basil] ...I don't know if anything can help. *sigh* I've made an awful mess of things.
[Sibyl-Vane] *relents, and does put her hand softly on his arm* You aren't alone in that, sir...
[Basil] *doesn't even notice* ...well, that isn't nice to know. *glances toward the kitchen door quickly*
[Wotton] *is quietly running through every bit of creative cursing he can manage*
[Sibyl-Vane] *timidly* I suppose not, but look at Shakespeare's lovers and heroes, things... things like this, always seem to happen. I don't mean that you're only a character in a play or something, but - well - the course of true love never did run smooth.
[Basil] *dry laugh* True love. That I somehow doubt. If anything, I'm the villain of the piece. And may I remind you... in the best known of Shakespeare's works, most of the cast dies before the final act.
[Sibyl-Vane] You're -not- the villain. You couldn't be, I'm sure of that. And .... *looks down* Well - I daresay I died before intermission.
[Sibyl-Vane] ...if I'm in this play at all.
[Basil] ...I feel villainous enough. I just want to apologize now... but... *chews lip* It would make Harry feel even worse...if that's even possible anymore...
[Sibyl-Vane] *softly* You don't -know- that it would.
[Basil] ....do you think I should go apologize?
[Sibyl-Vane] ....*takes a deep breath* I don't know what I think. I don't know whether I truly believe you should, or whether I... whether I'm just using you, intentionally or not, to get what -I- want, what I can't help but want, what I feel horribly guilty for wanting.
[Basil] ....*sigh* Oh dear. I feel horribly guilty, but.. I want... to make things better. I don't really care if you're using me or not. I just want some advice, because I can't think of anything on my own. I'm too confused.
[Sibyl-Vane] I don't think I'm the right person to be giving -anyone- advice... About anything, but especially, above all, love. I'm sorry...
[Basil] .....oh. *disappointment* ....I'm rather desperate, you understand. I'm simply lost in this.
[Sibyl-Vane] I know. I...sympathize. *wry smile* I'm almost always lost. I can try, though. I think... *bites her lip* I think, I do think, you should speak to Lord Henry.
[Basil] ......*stands up from couch slowly* ..thank you, Ms. Vane. *takes a deep breath and begins walking toward the kitchen*
[Sibyl-Vane] *wrings her hands, biting down harder on her lip* *whispers* I do hope... *watches him go*
[Basil] *walks slowly to the door and stands just inside the kitchen*
[Wotton] *doesn't look up, just yet*
[Basil] *takes a few steps further in, and stops uncertainly* *is very close to panicking*
[Wotton] *glances up* *strainedvoice* . . . Oh. Hello, Basil.
[Basil] *super!lipchewing!action!* *kneels a bit* ...Harry....
[Wotton] *melancholy!* Things . . . didn't go very well, I'm afraid.
[Basil] ....I'm sorry to hear that. *voice shakes* I'm really, very sorry. *doesn't cry, though. self-control, man!*
[Wotton] Yes, well . . . I'm sorry, too. [s]OBVIOUSLY[/s]
[Basil] .....*sits down* Harry... I really, really hope that everything goes well and.. I extremely sorry. I mean. I've never been so sorry in my life and-- You don't want to hear any of this, do you? *wibbles*
[Wotton] *sigh* -you've- got nothing to be sorry for, Basil. It was my own damned fault.
[Basil] ....*huge blink, doubletake of WTFness* ...but.. it -IS- my fault... I mean.... ?
[Wotton] . . . -how?-
[Wotton] In what way is it your fault?
[Basil] ..well, I mean.. I could have stopped you easily, I knew there would be horrible consequences and.. and.. ....Ididn'twantto.
[Wotton] . . . *raises eyebrows, wondering if he heard correctly*
[Basil] .... *nods just a tiny bit to signal that yes, he totally heard correctly* ........
[Wotton] . . . *blink*
[Basil] ...*sits around twitchily*
[Wotton] *cough*
[Basil] ....ummm... I'llleaveifyouwantmeto...
[Wotton] . . . No. Don't.
[Basil] ...all right. *stays still-ish*
[Wotton] *stares at floor* . . . Dorian wanted me to tell you good night.
[Basil] ...did he. Um. That's. *kind of choking*
[Wotton] Yes. I haven't the faintest idea what he meant by that.
[Basil] ....all right. *blinkblinkblink* *trembles vaguely*
[Wotton] . . . so I'm going to pretend for the moment that he actually meant for me to tell you goodnight from him. I don't think I have the capacity to work it out, at the moment.
[Basil] .... right. *nods, because something makes SENSE, kind of*
[Wotton] And . . . I'm sorry, Basil. I've probably gotten you into a terrible mess as well.
[Basil] ....*blink* I.. I hadn't even thought about it.. I mean... I was worried about you... both you of you. ...youreallyshouldn'tapologize.
[Wotton] . . . you would be, wouldn't you? *bites lip*
[Basil] Well, of course I would. I've been trying to help you be happy, and suddenly I go and mess it all up.
[Wotton] *facepalm* It wasn't your fault. I did . .. initiate everything, and all.
[Basil] ..yesbut.. but.. but.. Ididn'teven-want-todoanythingaboutit. *quivers*
[Wotton] . . . *carefully neutral* well, it's almost worse then, really. That's a bit of a . . . complication.
[Basil] .....*blushes a little* ...I'm-really-sorry. *closes eyes miserably*
[Wotton] Don't be. I only meant that-- well, if . . . if . . . [s]my, but this is awkward[/s] if I'd -known-, I wouldn't have--
[Wotton] well. I might have.
[Basil] .....*studies the oh-so-interesting floor*
[Wotton] But it was stupid of me, either way.
[Basil] ....it's all right. I.. I don't blame you. *swallows*
[Wotton] . . . I know you don't. Doesn't mean you haven't got every reason to.
[Basil] ....*has no lips left to be chewed, essentially* ..maybe. I don't want to blame you, though.
[Wotton] . . . *headinhands* this really can't end well, can it? The whole . . . situation, I mean.
[Basil] ......*is totally about to pat shoulder but thinks better of it* ..I hope it can. I really do.
[Wotton] Yes, I expected you would. *sigh* But considering that I've entirely lost track of how many times he said he hates me, things don't look very good.
[Basil] ....it probably wouldn't helpif I apologized again, would it?
[Wotton] . . . no, not particularly.
[Wotton] would it help you if I said I forgave you, even though I think there's absolutely nothing to forgive?
[Basil] .... I don't really think so, but would you anyway. Please.
[Wotton] *melancholy!smile* Then I forgive you, Basil. For every wrong, which adds up to precisely nothing.
[Basil] ....*smiles weakly back* ....that's really swee-- no. No, no, no. *sigh* Itshouldn'tworkinglikethisI'msor--no.
[Wotton] *is about to hug him, but-- ack, wait, probably a bad idea, considering . . . factors*
[Basil] *internal flailage liek WHOA* *should probably really not be hugged* ....this is -really- full circle now.
[Wotton] . . . it is, isn't it? *laughs, a little bitterly* Only it would probably be best not to continue the cycle.
[Basil] ...rather. *is... starting to get under control just a little*
[Sibyl-Vane] *rootsforhuggingsekritlyintheotherroom*
[Wotton] I don't even know why I feel so badly about all of this. It's not as if -he- doesn't . . . and then. Well. It's not as if Dorian and I have been the model of commited fidelity, anyway. It hardly makes sense that it would cause this sort of upset. *chews lower lip* . . . of course, it's probably because it was you.
[Basil] ...I figured that was the problem.
[Wotton] Still, I'm not sure if it's because it was you because of -your- history, or if he was thinking of . . . something else.
[Wotton] *MORE EDGING, WOW*
[Basil] ...*blink* ..what else would he be thinking of...?
[Wotton] *shrug* I don't know. Since you and I have known eachother so long-- since school, I mean-- it's not such a stretch to think that he might have gotten some -idea- or other.
[Basil] ......oh. Oh, I see. *twitches just a bit*
[Wotton] *notes the twitch* Well, I don't mean that-- oh, -you- know what I mean. Boys at school, and so on. It happens. Everyone -knows- it happens. So it's not rare for someone to -assume- . . .
[Marius] *blinks* Oh. Well, then. Apology accepted.
[Basil] ...I understand. *calm and placid, REALLY*
[Wotton] I don't know. It's probably nothing of the sort, really. It was just a thought I had.
[Basil] Right. A thought. ...do you think it would help if I said something.. to Dorian?
[Wotton] I'm not sure. It might.
[Wotton] . . . *cringe* Or it might -really- not.
[Basil] ....hm. I don't know... *ponders*
[Wotton] *sigh* then again, I think it could hardly get worse
[Wotton] So it may well be worth a try.
[Basil] ....that's something like what I was thinking. I think I will... later. [s]When I don't want to throw up at the very thought.[/s]
[Wotton] . . . I only hope he won't be upset with you, too.
[Basil] ...I would rather he be upset with me than you. It means more to you, after all.
[Wotton] yes, but better only me than the both of us, isn't it?
[Basil] ... I suppose.
[Wotton] Unless you are -really- determined that I should have company in the matter. *wry smile*
[Basil] ...well, I suppose I would feel a little better sharing the scorn, but that's just some sort of strange egotism speaking.
[Wotton] *shrug* Perhaps.
[Basil] *stares at the ground and starts shaking involuntarily again*
[Wotton] . . . Basil? *a bit concerned* Are you all right?
[Basil] ...*blinkblink* *looks up* ...as all right as can be expected, I guess. *tries to stop shaking*
[Wotton] *after a moment's hesitation, gives in and hugs him* You're sure?
[Basil] *tries really, really hard not to spaz and has limited success* Of course I'm sure.
[Wotton] It's just that you seem rather ... well, -not- so much all right.
[Basil] ....I'm trying. Sor---no.
[Wotton] . . . *hug!* *isn't clinging, really*
[Basil] *is totally not clinging back, why would you think so?*
[Wotton] *no reason at all, because there is none, of course*
[Wotton] . . . . . . . . . . . . *cling*
[Basil] .......... .....*cling, damnit*
[Wotton] ...whyisthissuchamess?
[Basil] ...Ijustdon'tknow.
[Wotton] *hides face in Basil's shoulder* whatifhereally-does-hateme?
[Basil] *pats back in something approaching a comforting manner* ...thenIreallydon'tknow.Sh.Trynottoworryaboutitrightnow.
[Wotton] *recovering, sort of vaguely,from the moment of panic* Isortofcan'thelpit.
[Basil] ...Iknow,Iknow.Buttry.I'msureit'llbefine.Hecan'thateyou.
[Wotton] ...exceptIthinkhereallycan.
[Basil] ...ohcomeon.Whocouldpossiblyhateyou?
[Wotton] . . . *smiles, despite himself, and USES SPACES YEY* You'd be amazed.
[Basil] I'm sure I would. *smiles back a little bit*
[Wotton] *unclings, slowly*
[Basil] *unclings considerably faster, because epp!* ..feeling better yet?
[Wotton] . . . do you want the honest answer, or the optimistic one?
[Basil] ...honesty, please.
[Wotton] . . . then no, not particularly.
[Wotton] Calmer, yes. Better, not really.
[Basil] ...well. Calmer is.. progress.
[Wotton] Yes. Of a sort.
[Basil] ...right, um. It's something.
[Wotton] ... thank you. For, ah ... coming back here. I wouldn't have blamed you if you'd taken off. And I'd probably be on the verge of hysteria, which isn't a particularly desirable idea.
[Basil] ...I was really debating not coming but.. I wanted to apologize. And I'm glad I helped you feel better, though I don't see how that works in the least.
[Wotton] . . . well, I don't particularly either, but ... *shrug* I'm not going to complain.
[Wotton] Why were you thinking of not coming?
[Basil] ... I thought you would be upset with me. I thought you didn't want to speak to me again. *looks at the very interesting ground*
[Wotton] Ah. Well, I'm not. I think I've said it already, but I'm really not.
[Basil] ...that's good.
[Wotton] . . . Circles again. *headinhands*
[Basil] ....definitely. *-doesn't- refrain from shoulder patting, because there's not much to be worse at this point*
[Wotton] . . . so.
[Wotton] . . . I ought to go home and at least -pretend- to sleep. *bites lip* *does that a lot, wow*
[Basil] ...yes. That will definitely help. *nodnod*
[Wotton] Good night, then. Or . . . well, morning now, isn't it?
[Basil] ..morning. Good morning.
[Wotton] *wry smile* Until later, in any case. *hugs again, briefly, and exits*
* Wotton has left #desperatefans
Typist: And we're ignoring the fact that Sibyl doesn't actually know what happened in the kitchen. No, she was not eavesdropping.