Theme of my life
It's always good when Andre and I talk about shit. I really like to know where I stand. Sometimes that confuses me, which it is right now. WE talked about the future and all that, kids, moving in together. He doesn't want to move in together. Okay. I practically live at his house... I don't quite understand why either. I totally respect that he's not ready for it, I mean we celebrated 6 months on Friday. 6 months is nothing in the grand scheme, so I understand. But then he goes and talks about kids, and all that. Maybe because he thinks that kids have nothing to do with me? If he does than he's sorrily wrong. I know he loves me, and he's so good to me. But there's still that reluctancy that he has that makes me wonder where I fit in. I don't understand where I fit into his grand picture. He talks about having it made, because he has a good job, and love. Two things that men always look for in life, and he's already got it made. But then, he doesn't want to move anywhere in our relationship... Am I wasting my time? If he can't commit to me now, is he going to be able to in the future? I just don't get what goes on in his head. He says he has absolutely no doubts about me, and whether being with me is the right thing. So where does that leave me? The minute I find myself a job, I'm moving out. And as it looks, I'm going to be moving out by myself. Sometimes you can feel so loved and yet feel so lonely.