If you talk too much, my head will explode
So things have been a little topsy turvy for the past week or so. School is just getting too much to take, and I'm so far behind in one of my classes, I'm not sure how I'm going to catch up. I've also bombed 3 out of my 4 midterms (and by bombed I mean C-range). I'm so glad I'm doing 3 years and getting out of there. I'm getting sick of it. If I could just audit a class and get a credit, I'd totally do it.
I guess everyone would.
Things with Andre have been odd lately. Last week he had a nightmare where I was mean, and ever since he's been apprehensive about everything. He hasn't mentioned moving in together, let alone buying a house. Which, 2 weeks ago was all he could talk about. I'm giving him his space because that's what he needs. Other than that, there's really nothing I can go by that things are weird. I get feelings and those feelings usually tend to be right. He wears his heart on his sleeve for the most part.
Last night and yesterday, things "felt" better, more normal. Except he did something weird that I can't stop thinking about. I was on the bed, watching TV and he was talking on MSN. His ex girlfriend (from a long time ago) was online, and telling him how all their old friends were getting married. She thought this was way too early (etc. etc.), and was going on and on about it. Anyway, he told her that he was getting married in 5 months, and kept the act up for a good hour. She was shocked, and wasn't expecting him to say it. She congratulated him anyway, and basically said "I guess things are going well with Ashley" (she knew my name). And he agreed, and stuff. Finally, after he was talking about himself getting married, he said (out of context) "no marriage" and she sort of just laughed, and said "not right now anyway". And he said "someday, though", and she basically just said she was happy for him.
When he got off msn, he went searching around the internet for places to have his wedding. He decided that he'd like to get married on a cliff overlooking water. I showed him where I want to get married (which is more realistic).
My friend works there, and she says it's nice. Andre looked at the pictures, and said "Aaah! That's where I want to get married!!" and I thought he was joking, cause he was so enthusiastic, but I guess not. He seemed genuinely interested.
Then last night, when we dozing off to sleep, he asked "Do you think we're going to feel this way about each other forever?", which was a legitimate question, to which my answer was "You never know until you get there". And he asked me what my definition of success was (which I know is his test to see if I'm worthy). I said it was finding a balance between yourself and your surroundings, and also finding that same balance within yourself. To me that's success, I'm not sure if I passed his test, but he gave me a hug and a kiss on the forehead, so I guess I was "validated". That's his new term for everything "yes, I think I'll validate you" (he validates money orders for a living).
Anyway, That's what's new and confusing.
I guess everyone would.
Things with Andre have been odd lately. Last week he had a nightmare where I was mean, and ever since he's been apprehensive about everything. He hasn't mentioned moving in together, let alone buying a house. Which, 2 weeks ago was all he could talk about. I'm giving him his space because that's what he needs. Other than that, there's really nothing I can go by that things are weird. I get feelings and those feelings usually tend to be right. He wears his heart on his sleeve for the most part.
Last night and yesterday, things "felt" better, more normal. Except he did something weird that I can't stop thinking about. I was on the bed, watching TV and he was talking on MSN. His ex girlfriend (from a long time ago) was online, and telling him how all their old friends were getting married. She thought this was way too early (etc. etc.), and was going on and on about it. Anyway, he told her that he was getting married in 5 months, and kept the act up for a good hour. She was shocked, and wasn't expecting him to say it. She congratulated him anyway, and basically said "I guess things are going well with Ashley" (she knew my name). And he agreed, and stuff. Finally, after he was talking about himself getting married, he said (out of context) "no marriage" and she sort of just laughed, and said "not right now anyway". And he said "someday, though", and she basically just said she was happy for him.
When he got off msn, he went searching around the internet for places to have his wedding. He decided that he'd like to get married on a cliff overlooking water. I showed him where I want to get married (which is more realistic).
My friend works there, and she says it's nice. Andre looked at the pictures, and said "Aaah! That's where I want to get married!!" and I thought he was joking, cause he was so enthusiastic, but I guess not. He seemed genuinely interested.
Then last night, when we dozing off to sleep, he asked "Do you think we're going to feel this way about each other forever?", which was a legitimate question, to which my answer was "You never know until you get there". And he asked me what my definition of success was (which I know is his test to see if I'm worthy). I said it was finding a balance between yourself and your surroundings, and also finding that same balance within yourself. To me that's success, I'm not sure if I passed his test, but he gave me a hug and a kiss on the forehead, so I guess I was "validated". That's his new term for everything "yes, I think I'll validate you" (he validates money orders for a living).
Anyway, That's what's new and confusing.