i get what i deserve
im not a mean person by nature. or selfish either. but people do make mistakes. no one ever said i was perfect. oh wait he did. todays the day though that everything comes back to me. and though ive always hoped this day would never come. i deserve it. so call me names. say what it is you want to say. ill take it till you turn away. youll never read this. no you dont know this journal even exists. but IM SORRY.
i dont know what to say. i dont know how to deal. i read every word you wrote. in fact i read it three times in a row. and i still cant believe that this is happening. IM SORRY. IM SORRY. IM SORRY. i wish i could make those words mean something to you. i wish i could make you believe that i am saying them honestly.
ive got way too much going on right now. and i dont know how to deal. ive been working so hard to keep it all together. and ive been searching so long to figure myself out. but eventually everythings gonna fall. watch out. cause im falling apart now.
and ive got alot of thinking to do. i think its time for me to leave.
what you wrote is true. to an extent. i had no right to do what i did. i treated you both horribly. but i did it unintentionally.
"because when you are with them you change for them. you make yourself the person you think they might want to be friends with. so far it seems like it worked like a charm."
im not quite sure how i got myself in this situation. and i have no fucking clue as to how to get myself out. yeah ive fucked everything up horribly. yeah im a fucking horrible person. and i cant think of anything else to say except that im sorry.
i dont know what to say. i dont know how to deal. i read every word you wrote. in fact i read it three times in a row. and i still cant believe that this is happening. IM SORRY. IM SORRY. IM SORRY. i wish i could make those words mean something to you. i wish i could make you believe that i am saying them honestly.
ive got way too much going on right now. and i dont know how to deal. ive been working so hard to keep it all together. and ive been searching so long to figure myself out. but eventually everythings gonna fall. watch out. cause im falling apart now.
and ive got alot of thinking to do. i think its time for me to leave.
what you wrote is true. to an extent. i had no right to do what i did. i treated you both horribly. but i did it unintentionally.
"because when you are with them you change for them. you make yourself the person you think they might want to be friends with. so far it seems like it worked like a charm."
im not quite sure how i got myself in this situation. and i have no fucking clue as to how to get myself out. yeah ive fucked everything up horribly. yeah im a fucking horrible person. and i cant think of anything else to say except that im sorry.