Raindrops keep falling on my head
I am sick and tired of my parents. Just writing this makes me cry SO hard. After showing them, numerous times that I have grown up, that I have achieved more than half the shit that they have set up for me, I am still treated like a little fucking girl. And THAT makes me so mad. Not the fact that they don't allow me to do something, not the fact that thier views are so fucking old and outdated, not the fact that they don't fucking care about anything but their own fucking personal gain. What makes me livid, yes livid, is the fact that they still view me as a fucking little girl. Like i'm five years old, and i can't do anything for myself. I don't know how much longer i can stand their shit.
3 more months is what I'm thinking. I have 3 more fucking months of living in a hell i call home.
I hate thier rules, I hate their dumb views. They are sexist, racist annoying ass motherfuckers. They cannot see past what they are saying. It makes me want to throw up just hearing my father's views. They cannot comprehend the fact that sometimes they may be wrong, they cannot pass the fact that sometimes people make mistakes. I have been a PERFECT daughter. Bringing in the grades, bringing in the college acceptance letters, I have made my own money, i've stayed away from heavy drugs. I've done everything to be a perfect daughter. And it seems that nothing, NOTHING, satisfies them...EVER. They always find fault in something. Whenever I achieve ANYTHING somewhat special, they belittle it and bring it down. They have the nerve to make it seem like something not the great.
I never got the special, congratulations from them. Til this day, we still haven't celebrated any of my recent achievements. And it hurts. it really really fucking hurts.
At first i tried to understand, i tried, i really did. I tried seeing it from their point of view, figuring "okay, they are from a different culture, they don't understand", but i'm SO done with that excuse. They do understand, everything so perfectly. They just don't want to see me happy. They do not care what makes me happy, what makes me sad. It only bothers them when I do something that might bring shame to them.
I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of sitting here and feeling alone.
3 more months is what I'm thinking. I have 3 more fucking months of living in a hell i call home.
I hate thier rules, I hate their dumb views. They are sexist, racist annoying ass motherfuckers. They cannot see past what they are saying. It makes me want to throw up just hearing my father's views. They cannot comprehend the fact that sometimes they may be wrong, they cannot pass the fact that sometimes people make mistakes. I have been a PERFECT daughter. Bringing in the grades, bringing in the college acceptance letters, I have made my own money, i've stayed away from heavy drugs. I've done everything to be a perfect daughter. And it seems that nothing, NOTHING, satisfies them...EVER. They always find fault in something. Whenever I achieve ANYTHING somewhat special, they belittle it and bring it down. They have the nerve to make it seem like something not the great.
I never got the special, congratulations from them. Til this day, we still haven't celebrated any of my recent achievements. And it hurts. it really really fucking hurts.
At first i tried to understand, i tried, i really did. I tried seeing it from their point of view, figuring "okay, they are from a different culture, they don't understand", but i'm SO done with that excuse. They do understand, everything so perfectly. They just don't want to see me happy. They do not care what makes me happy, what makes me sad. It only bothers them when I do something that might bring shame to them.
I'm tired of crying. I'm tired of sitting here and feeling alone.