Come Together
Title: Come Together
Author: Mrs. Muir aka whenbuffysmiles
Fandom: American Idol RPS
Beta: heartsasmagnets
Pairing: Kris Allen / Adam Lambert
Rating: NC-17
Summary: WIP - Take the American Idol journey with Kradam. As the show progresses so does their relationship. But is it just a fling or are they willing to make the sacrifices necessary to make it last beyond the finale?
Disclaimer: This didn't happen. Kris and Adam belong only to themselves.
Previous Chapters
Chapter 34
It had been a very bad mistake. When the impulse first came to Kris, it sounded okay. The reasoning behind it was sound. If he followed through then Adam would focus his attention on him again. Now he felt humiliated. His tongue was sticking out from between gaping lips, his stomach was rolling as the reflex to gag was trying to take control and the revolting taste of raw fish was in his mouth. The worst part was that Adam was laughing at him. It was so not the attention that he'd wanted when he'd snatched the last piece of sushi from Adam's plate.
"Open wider," Adam instructed, leaning over.
Kris obeyed and was infinitely relieved when Adam's tongue swept through his mouth, taking the nastiness away. "Thank you," Kris said, following through on another impulse. He took the glass from Adam's hand and swallowed down his drink to cleanse his mouth. He almost choked from the volume of alcohol burning its way down his throat. Wasn't there anything in the glass besides vodka?
Giving up on ever reaching a cool status with Adam, Kris leaned his head on the back of the couch and wished he could take back the last few minutes. He couldn’t though, but it didn't matter when he felt Adam's mouth against his own. He sighed in contentment as he and Adam slid and tangled their tongues together. So easily, Adam was taking away all his doubts and giving him the one thing he'd wanted when the fiasco had started.
"Do you wanna dance?" Adam whispered while nibbling on his ear.
"Yeah," Kris said.
This time on the trip back through the house there weren't as many stares directed at them. But they actually received a few nods of hello or friendly waves. Kris was relieved that they were fitting in as a couple in this crazy place. They were accepting Kris as one of them and he liked that idea.
In the ballroom, Kris stepped into Adam's arms, snuggling tight against him and burying his face in Adam's shoulder. This was his place. He refused to think of the other men who might have considered it their place. Adam was with him now. Arms were tight around him as they swayed to a song that was anything but slow, but it didn't matter what music was playing as long as they were together.
Unfortunately, a headache was slowly overcoming Kris's pleasure. He sighed as he burrowed closer to Adam trying to escape the pounding inside his skull.
"You okay?" Adam asked, leaning back so he could look down into his face.
"Headache," Kris said, trying to pull Adam back. It would go away, but it seemed Adam wouldn't have that.
"You probably need some water," Adam said, placing a feather light kiss on his forehead. "Come on."
It wasn’t what Kris wanted, but he knew there would be no arguing with Adam. It was best just to let him have his way and then they could get back to dancing.
Adam led him to a quiet corner. "Sit here and I'll be back in a second with water and some aspirin."
"Okay," Kris said, hating that he wasn’t able to hide his headache. They didn't have much longer before they had to be back for curfew at the mansion. He didn't want to waste it being separated from Adam. He pulled his feet up and wrapped his arms around them.
Adam was trying to make his way through the crowd, but people kept stopping him. They were probably asking questions about Idol and why Kris was with him. This would be the first chance they could ask since this was the first time he’d been separated from Adam since they'd gotten here. He may as well get comfortable because he could tell that Adam wasn't going to be back as soon as he’d thought.
"Kris?" A voice over his shoulder called to him.
Kris looked around to find Doug standing there. "Hi."
"You okay?"
Kris explained about his headache and that Adam was getting him something for it.
Doug laughed. "I think its going to take him a while. Come with me," he said, taking Kris's hand.
Adam had said trust him and after locating Adam only a few feet from where he'd been when he'd left, Kris decided to follow Doug. They moved along the edge of the partygoers until they reached a hallway that Kris hadn't seen before. At the end, there was a door with a touchpad lock. Doug punched in the code and then directed Kris to precede him into another hallway.
Once Kris crossed the threshold, he felt better. The air here was not only cool, but also clear from any smoke. He took a deep breath, filling his lungs with the purity that he'd almost forgotten existed.
"Different air system," Doug explained, moving past him. With a wave to follow him, he led the way. They passed another living room that was obviously Doug and his partner's private area. It looked lived in with books and magazines scattered across the coffee table and a large screened television dominated one wall.
At the end of the hallway, Doug led the way into what was someone's study. It was decorated with a masculine flair with dark wood and leather chairs. Doug left him as he slipped into a small bathroom in the corner. Kris turned to study the photographs on the walls. They were of movie stars, recording artists and other well-known figures with either Doug or who Kris assumed was his partner or both of them.
"That's Steve," Doug said, handing him two tablets and a bottle of cold water. "Take these. You'll feel better." When Kris rolled them in his palm, Doug said. "Don't worry they're only Tylenol."
"Sorry," Kris said, popping them into this mouth. He took a long swallow of the liquid letting it quench his parched throat. He hadn't realized how bad he felt until he was away from the smoke and the noise. "Thank you. I really appreciate it."
"No problem," Doug went to sit on the edge of the desk. "Adam has never brought a date before. I was surprised when he called and asked if it was all right to bring you."
"I appreciate you allowing me to be here," Kris said, shoving his hands in his pockets as he continued to look through the photos on the wall. "It's hard for us to spend time together outside the mansion."
"I can only imagine. It's one of the reasons why we throw these parties," Doug said, tugging on the ends of the bright red scarf hanging around his neck. "There's so many that can't be openly out that we wanted to create a safe environment. Not only for them but for the young men in Hollywood who can be victims of the vultures."
"It's good of you," Kris said. "Adam told me that sometimes he came here, not only to party, but to be able to eat."
"Yeah, it's rough for so many with big dreams that we wanted to give them a place to feel safe."
"Who is this?" Kris asked when he came upon a photo of Doug in a tuxedo and a woman in a wedding dress. He turned as he waited for an explanation.
"My ex-wife," Doug said, coming to stand beside Kris. "She put up with a lot from me while we were married including giving me a son."
"Wow," Kris said. "Did you come out late?"
"Nah, I've known I was gay since the time I tried to paint my diapers pink." Doug smiled. "But I was lonely. Steve and I were on the outs when I met Barb. She was a good friend so I decided what the heck. It was the nineties and I wanted some stability. So, we had the big wedding, did the suburban thing, had a son and then one day she said she wanted us to both be happy and the only the way that was going to happen was for us to get a divorce. I agreed with relief."
"She doesn’t hate you?"
"Are you worried about Katy hating you?" Doug waved his hand. "I watch the show so I've seen her and heard about her."
"Yeah," Kris shook his head as he rubbed the back of his neck. "It wasn’t fair to marry her."
"Did you ever deliberately lie to her? Or go out of your way to hurt her?"
"No, but…"
Doug squeezed Kris's shoulder. "We all make mistakes, but it’s the way we deal with those mistakes that shows the truth of our character. If you've told her the truth, dealt with the whole thing as well as you can then you've done everything you can do. The rest is up to her and what she does will tell what kind of character she has."
"You're right," Kris said. It was all things that he'd told himself, but it was good to hear it from someone who had walked the same road he'd been traveling.
"Kris, I’m a nosy man so tell me to butt out if you feel I'm overstepping my bounds," Doug said. "But I don't want you to make some of the mistakes I've made. So, I’m just going to ask. Are you holding back in your relationship with Adam because of the guilt you feel over your marriage?"
A part of him didn't want to discuss his relationship with Adam with anyone especially a stranger, but a part of him needed to talk. It helped that Doug was gay and seemed to understand how he was feeling.
"Yeah, I guess I am." Kris sighed. "I know it's probably foolish, but a part of me feels like I shouldn't be happy with all the unhappiness I've caused."
"Oh Kris," Doug smiled. "Everyone is responsible for their own happiness in the end. Don't you deserve to be happy especially after years of denying it? And what about Adam? Doesn't he deserve the best of you? Don't you want him to feel…that you want to be with him?"
"Yes, I do," Kris said, nodding.
"Stop right there," Doug raised his hand. "Then give it to him, son. Adam needs to feel loved and if you can make him feel secure then he'll always be there for you."
"You sound like you really know him."
"We've talked a bit here and there over the years," Doug explained. "He's a good man who's been hurt. When he talks about you, he sounds happy. I like that. I'm an old settled queen who wants everyone to feel the same contentment that I do."
Nothing mattered more to Kris than making Adam happy. Maybe if he just let go with Adam then he would find the security that he needed himself. It was just a matter of faith and Kris had always lived that way so why should his relationship with Adam be any different? Shouldn’t he trust his relationship with Adam to God?
There was no way to separate only a portion of his life from God so to be complete he needed to bring them together. It would be the only way to truly be the light for Adam, too. In admitting this to himself, he felt a dark part of his heart give way to the light and he was ready to move forward. He smiled at Doug.
"Thank you," Kris said. "For the Tylenol which seems to have worked and for talking to me. I appreciate it."
"Good," Doug said. "Call me anytime." He slipped an arm around Kris's shoulder to start leading him back down the hallway. "I like you crazy kids and would love to hear how things go with you two. Now, let's go find your man."
"I'll do that," Kris said. "Maybe the four of us can do dinner or something."
"Lovely," Doug stepped out into the fray of the party. He scanned the room and then pointed. "There's Adam." He leaned closer to Kris. "Play along. Give an old man a thrill."
"Okay," Kris said, with a smile that he suppressed when they got closer to Adam. He didn't know what Doug had in mind, but he wanted to be ready. Not that he could act but he'd try it.
"Oh there you are," Doug said, taking Adam's arm. "We were looking for you."
"Where were you?" Adam asked. "I turned around and you were gone."
"Don't be a fusspot," Doug said. "I got him some medicine and darling, I couldn’t resist."
"What do you mean?"
Kris could feel Adam's eyes studying him. He stared down at his shoe with his hands shoved in his pockets.
"Your boy is so adorable," Doug continued. "I told him that all the newbies have to give me a blowjob as part of the initiation rites." He patted Adam on the back while smiling at Kris. "Kris is really special. You've taught him well. Now, I'll leave you alone." He kissed Kris's cheek. "See you later."
Kris was biting the inside of his cheek trying not to laugh. Adam's stepped closer to him as his fingers lifted Kris's chin so that he was forced to look at Adam. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't stop himself from busting out laughing. At least he did until Adam bent down until their noses were almost touching.
"You think it's funny to tease your man like that?" Adam's voice rolled over him like silk but Kris could hear the anger threading through his words.
"Sorry, but come on," Kris said, shrugging, but his stomach was dropping at the seriousness on Adam’s face. "It was a joke."
"You do not ever, ever, play at making me jealous," Adam said, with eyebrows raised.
"Adam," Kris started, but found himself jerked off his feet as Adam pulled him through the room. Kris didn't look around. He didn't want to see anyone staring at them. He felt humiliated. They'd been getting along since their last blow up and it was the last thing he wanted tonight. Hopefully, they were going somewhere private where he already knew he would beg if it would keep Adam from being any angrier. He was relieved when they entered a room just inside the first hallway. It was a small sitting room. Kris jumped when Adam slammed the door behind them and shut the light off with the next motion.
"Would you listen to me?" Kris turned as Adam grabbed his shoulders, walking him backward until he hit the wall. A painting on the wall rattled from the force. He swallowed hard as he looked up into the coldness of Adam's face.
"No," Adam with a growl. He started to undo Kris's belt buckle. "You crossed a line…an unforgivable line."
"What are you doing?" Kris stammered as Adam shoved his pants down his hips. His first thought was that Adam was going to spank him. He wasn't sure if he was afraid of Adam, ashamed that someone would find out or a little thrilled at the thought of Adam’s bare hand on his ass. A voice outside the door brought him quickly back to the reality of where they were and that they hadn’t locked the door. "Stop," he yelped, grabbing for his pants.
"You have to be punished," Adam grinned, dropping to his knees.
"Oh shit," Kris said when Adam took him into his mouth with no foreplay. His cock was in Adam's mouth to the hilt. Adam’s soft exhale ruffled his pubic hair sending a warm drift over his flesh.
Someone could walk in and, despite the supposed safety of this party, it could end up splashed all over the internet in a matter of hours.
Adam sucked hard while his tongue rolled around his shaft sending desire racing through him.
Someone was right outside the door. Laughter echoed down the hallway.
Adam lapped at the head of his cock. Kris’s reached to grab Adam's hair so he could bury himself in the wet heat of Adam’s mouth again.
Something or someone jangled the door.
All of a sudden it didn’t matter to Kris if someone did walk in the room.
"Who the fuck cares?" Kris muttered, trying to convince himself. An all consuming heat stole over his flesh rocking him on his feet. He raised his arms along the wall as his fingers scrabbled for something to hold himself up. Anything to keep from diving his fingers into Adam’s hair. That would upset Adam and he would hate to see the punishment for that sin.
Adam pulled his pants down until they were around his knees without ever giving up sucking him off. A shiver ran down his spine when Adam's finger teased at his ass.
“Do it,” Kris pleaded. “Please…Adam.”
Kris could almost see Adam grin, but he got what he wanted. Adam pushed his finger deep into his ass while his thumb rubbed against the sensitive place between his anus and his balls. It was like lightning striking as his pelvis tightened with intense ecstasy. Kris came in a violent shuddering that left his knees giving way. Thankfully, Adam was there to hold him up. He buried his face in Adam's chest as he tried to stop panting. At least he did until he could feel the rumble of Adam's chest from laughter. Kris swatted at him but knew he deserved to be the object of his mirth.
Something gave inside Kris. He'd tried to walk the line since beginning a relationship with his Idol co-star. A line of still being the good boy that his family expected and America saw when they watched him and being the man that Adam wanted. He'd known all along that Adam often reigned in his passions so as not to shock Kris or ask him to do something he was uncomfortable performing. It wasn't fair. Adam had been everything that Kris had asked him to be since their fight and it was time for Kris to give back. He raised his head to look Adam straight in the eyes. He didn't want to miss the reaction to his next words.
"I want your cock buried as far inside of me as it can get," Kris said, proud that he didn't blush or stammer. "And I want you to fuck me hard."
It was worth it as Adam's eyes opened wide and his jaw dropped. Kris took advantage as he pulled Adam down for a kiss that made his intentions clear. Adam pushed him against the wall, their tongues tumbling together as Kris pulled his pants back up. He wasn't ready to be fucked in Doug's house yet.
"Take me home," Kris commanded.
There was no argument. Adam pulled his phone out to call Ceci to pull the car around to the front of the house. Grabbing his hand, Adam pulled him through the crowd. Doug was watching them. Kris waved to him then gave him a thumbs up. He knew he'd made a new friend, but right now, he wanted Adam. Ceci already had the car running as they burst through the front door. Kris felt like he was flying with the speed that Adam was pulling him. He was pushed into the back seat with Adam climbing in practically on top of him.
Kris didn't move far. As soon as the door was closed and the car was moving down the driveway and without any pretense he straddled Adam. He didn't even care that Ceci was in the front seat. He needed Adam who obviously needed him because his hands immediately went to hold onto Kris's hips.
Later he would be thankful that the windows were tinted as he played the aggressor. Adam laid his head back, sliding down so their pelvises were straining against one another while Kris alternated between kissing Adam's lips and nibbling his neck. Kris was lost in passionate haze as his desire built with no way to relieve it. He wasn't sure how far he'd go if they didn't get back to the mansion soon.
"Okay, you two," Ceci said interrupting them. "Separate or do I have to get the hose?"
"We're at the mansion," Adam panted while pushing on Kris's shoulders.
Kris wiped at his face while to push the lust induced fog away. Glancing out the window, he realized that they weren't all the way to the front door where anyone could walk out. He made a mental note to thank Ceci later for his discretion.
"Go around to the side door," Ceci instructed. "I'll unlock it and let you in. Remember there are security cameras so pull the shirts out." He chuckled. "And I expect a fucking big tip for this one."
"No problem," Kris said, smiling as he tried to climb out as if he wasn't hard as a rock and shivering with a combination of desire and the cool California night. It didn't help that Adam was several feet away.
Somehow, they managed to get to the side door. It was unlocked just as Ceci promised, but once they were inside, they exploded. Kris grabbed Adam's hand, pulling him this time in his wake. Except those long legs on Adam kept making Adam have to slow down so he didn't plow Kris down. They jumped down the stairs and raced to Adam's room.
"Fucking horny bastard," Adam said, reaching to undo Kris's pants again. "Who the hell gave you all the green M&Ms?"
"Complaining?" Kris asked while his own hands were busy undoing Adam's jeans. He was spun around and pushed face first on the bed. "Hey, don't damage the goods," Kris said as he landed with a bounce.
"It's bendable," Adam said, lifting Kris's legs up so that he could remove his shoes and pants. Then he was crawling on top of him. "And no I'm not complaining." He shoved Kris's shirt up as he squirted lube on Kris's ass. There was no tender preparation before he felt Adam's dick at his entrance. "You ready?"
"Would you fuck me already?" Kris grunted, grabbing the edge of the mattress as Adam thrust into him. He cried out as he was driven into the bed, but Adam didn't stop pounding into him. Then he slowed his movements almost making Kris scream in frustration.
Adam covered him, his hands holding onto Kris's hips as he slowly pumped in and out of him. "You want to try something new?"
Kris laughed, but answered yes. At this point, he was game for anything, but he was surprised when Adam rolled them over so that Kris was on top. Except because of the way they'd started out, he was facing away from Adam. He rearranged his legs so that he was kneeling over Adam. They'd never done it like this, always preferring to face one another when they made love. Except this wasn't love, this was fucking, and Kris was finding the thrill in it.
His eyes closed as his world narrowed to the cock he was riding and the cock in his hand. Adam had done this for him. Somehow, he'd known that a part of Kris was breaking free tonight and wanted him to take it where he wanted. If it wasn't for Adam beneath him and his fingers digging into Kris's hips, Kris could have been alone.
He ran his hand up and down his cock as he fashioned the movement of his ride with the stroking his cock. For the first time he could honestly say he was enjoying anal sex. He'd found just the right movement to bring him the most pleasure. The world disappeared as he lost himself in his own gratification. Not even Adam mattered anymore as he felt himself giving into a long denied hunger.
When he came, it was too soon. It took a moment for the world to intrude as he tried to find his breath. Kris blinked as things came into focus and he caught Adam watching him in the mirror. The combination of love and need on his face gave Kris validation that he was truly wanted. Maybe this wasn't what a good boy did even in the privacy of his bedroom, but here he was Adam's and he just had to be himself.
"Your turn," Kris grinned.
That was all Adam needed to flip them again. Adam had his hands planted on either side of Kris.
"You want to get fucked hard, baby?"
"Please, Big Daddy," Kris answered, laughing with the headiness of the night.
"My pleasure," Adam said, slamming deep into him.
Never before had Adam had taken so little care with him. Kris felt he was being hammered into as Adam gave in to his own need. To give Adam the freedom to find his own ecstasy was just as thrilling as finding his own. He was just thankful that his head was over the edge of the bed so that he could breathe. The difference in their sizes had never been an issue before until he was face down on the bed with Adam on top of him. Kris gripped the edge of the bed, pushing back so they didn't go sliding over the edge. The moment Adam lost control he bit down on Kris's shoulder as his body convulsed from his orgasm.
"Damn," Adam said a few minutes later as he rolled off Kris. "I mean wow…," he laughed. "I don't even have the words for it."
"Kick awesome?" Kris offered.
"Yeah, fucking kick awesome," Adam laughed.
…to be continued
Author: Mrs. Muir aka whenbuffysmiles
Fandom: American Idol RPS
Beta: heartsasmagnets
Pairing: Kris Allen / Adam Lambert
Rating: NC-17
Summary: WIP - Take the American Idol journey with Kradam. As the show progresses so does their relationship. But is it just a fling or are they willing to make the sacrifices necessary to make it last beyond the finale?
Disclaimer: This didn't happen. Kris and Adam belong only to themselves.
Previous Chapters
Chapter 34
It had been a very bad mistake. When the impulse first came to Kris, it sounded okay. The reasoning behind it was sound. If he followed through then Adam would focus his attention on him again. Now he felt humiliated. His tongue was sticking out from between gaping lips, his stomach was rolling as the reflex to gag was trying to take control and the revolting taste of raw fish was in his mouth. The worst part was that Adam was laughing at him. It was so not the attention that he'd wanted when he'd snatched the last piece of sushi from Adam's plate.
"Open wider," Adam instructed, leaning over.
Kris obeyed and was infinitely relieved when Adam's tongue swept through his mouth, taking the nastiness away. "Thank you," Kris said, following through on another impulse. He took the glass from Adam's hand and swallowed down his drink to cleanse his mouth. He almost choked from the volume of alcohol burning its way down his throat. Wasn't there anything in the glass besides vodka?
Giving up on ever reaching a cool status with Adam, Kris leaned his head on the back of the couch and wished he could take back the last few minutes. He couldn’t though, but it didn't matter when he felt Adam's mouth against his own. He sighed in contentment as he and Adam slid and tangled their tongues together. So easily, Adam was taking away all his doubts and giving him the one thing he'd wanted when the fiasco had started.
"Do you wanna dance?" Adam whispered while nibbling on his ear.
"Yeah," Kris said.
This time on the trip back through the house there weren't as many stares directed at them. But they actually received a few nods of hello or friendly waves. Kris was relieved that they were fitting in as a couple in this crazy place. They were accepting Kris as one of them and he liked that idea.
In the ballroom, Kris stepped into Adam's arms, snuggling tight against him and burying his face in Adam's shoulder. This was his place. He refused to think of the other men who might have considered it their place. Adam was with him now. Arms were tight around him as they swayed to a song that was anything but slow, but it didn't matter what music was playing as long as they were together.
Unfortunately, a headache was slowly overcoming Kris's pleasure. He sighed as he burrowed closer to Adam trying to escape the pounding inside his skull.
"You okay?" Adam asked, leaning back so he could look down into his face.
"Headache," Kris said, trying to pull Adam back. It would go away, but it seemed Adam wouldn't have that.
"You probably need some water," Adam said, placing a feather light kiss on his forehead. "Come on."
It wasn’t what Kris wanted, but he knew there would be no arguing with Adam. It was best just to let him have his way and then they could get back to dancing.
Adam led him to a quiet corner. "Sit here and I'll be back in a second with water and some aspirin."
"Okay," Kris said, hating that he wasn’t able to hide his headache. They didn't have much longer before they had to be back for curfew at the mansion. He didn't want to waste it being separated from Adam. He pulled his feet up and wrapped his arms around them.
Adam was trying to make his way through the crowd, but people kept stopping him. They were probably asking questions about Idol and why Kris was with him. This would be the first chance they could ask since this was the first time he’d been separated from Adam since they'd gotten here. He may as well get comfortable because he could tell that Adam wasn't going to be back as soon as he’d thought.
"Kris?" A voice over his shoulder called to him.
Kris looked around to find Doug standing there. "Hi."
"You okay?"
Kris explained about his headache and that Adam was getting him something for it.
Doug laughed. "I think its going to take him a while. Come with me," he said, taking Kris's hand.
Adam had said trust him and after locating Adam only a few feet from where he'd been when he'd left, Kris decided to follow Doug. They moved along the edge of the partygoers until they reached a hallway that Kris hadn't seen before. At the end, there was a door with a touchpad lock. Doug punched in the code and then directed Kris to precede him into another hallway.
Once Kris crossed the threshold, he felt better. The air here was not only cool, but also clear from any smoke. He took a deep breath, filling his lungs with the purity that he'd almost forgotten existed.
"Different air system," Doug explained, moving past him. With a wave to follow him, he led the way. They passed another living room that was obviously Doug and his partner's private area. It looked lived in with books and magazines scattered across the coffee table and a large screened television dominated one wall.
At the end of the hallway, Doug led the way into what was someone's study. It was decorated with a masculine flair with dark wood and leather chairs. Doug left him as he slipped into a small bathroom in the corner. Kris turned to study the photographs on the walls. They were of movie stars, recording artists and other well-known figures with either Doug or who Kris assumed was his partner or both of them.
"That's Steve," Doug said, handing him two tablets and a bottle of cold water. "Take these. You'll feel better." When Kris rolled them in his palm, Doug said. "Don't worry they're only Tylenol."
"Sorry," Kris said, popping them into this mouth. He took a long swallow of the liquid letting it quench his parched throat. He hadn't realized how bad he felt until he was away from the smoke and the noise. "Thank you. I really appreciate it."
"No problem," Doug went to sit on the edge of the desk. "Adam has never brought a date before. I was surprised when he called and asked if it was all right to bring you."
"I appreciate you allowing me to be here," Kris said, shoving his hands in his pockets as he continued to look through the photos on the wall. "It's hard for us to spend time together outside the mansion."
"I can only imagine. It's one of the reasons why we throw these parties," Doug said, tugging on the ends of the bright red scarf hanging around his neck. "There's so many that can't be openly out that we wanted to create a safe environment. Not only for them but for the young men in Hollywood who can be victims of the vultures."
"It's good of you," Kris said. "Adam told me that sometimes he came here, not only to party, but to be able to eat."
"Yeah, it's rough for so many with big dreams that we wanted to give them a place to feel safe."
"Who is this?" Kris asked when he came upon a photo of Doug in a tuxedo and a woman in a wedding dress. He turned as he waited for an explanation.
"My ex-wife," Doug said, coming to stand beside Kris. "She put up with a lot from me while we were married including giving me a son."
"Wow," Kris said. "Did you come out late?"
"Nah, I've known I was gay since the time I tried to paint my diapers pink." Doug smiled. "But I was lonely. Steve and I were on the outs when I met Barb. She was a good friend so I decided what the heck. It was the nineties and I wanted some stability. So, we had the big wedding, did the suburban thing, had a son and then one day she said she wanted us to both be happy and the only the way that was going to happen was for us to get a divorce. I agreed with relief."
"She doesn’t hate you?"
"Are you worried about Katy hating you?" Doug waved his hand. "I watch the show so I've seen her and heard about her."
"Yeah," Kris shook his head as he rubbed the back of his neck. "It wasn’t fair to marry her."
"Did you ever deliberately lie to her? Or go out of your way to hurt her?"
"No, but…"
Doug squeezed Kris's shoulder. "We all make mistakes, but it’s the way we deal with those mistakes that shows the truth of our character. If you've told her the truth, dealt with the whole thing as well as you can then you've done everything you can do. The rest is up to her and what she does will tell what kind of character she has."
"You're right," Kris said. It was all things that he'd told himself, but it was good to hear it from someone who had walked the same road he'd been traveling.
"Kris, I’m a nosy man so tell me to butt out if you feel I'm overstepping my bounds," Doug said. "But I don't want you to make some of the mistakes I've made. So, I’m just going to ask. Are you holding back in your relationship with Adam because of the guilt you feel over your marriage?"
A part of him didn't want to discuss his relationship with Adam with anyone especially a stranger, but a part of him needed to talk. It helped that Doug was gay and seemed to understand how he was feeling.
"Yeah, I guess I am." Kris sighed. "I know it's probably foolish, but a part of me feels like I shouldn't be happy with all the unhappiness I've caused."
"Oh Kris," Doug smiled. "Everyone is responsible for their own happiness in the end. Don't you deserve to be happy especially after years of denying it? And what about Adam? Doesn't he deserve the best of you? Don't you want him to feel…that you want to be with him?"
"Yes, I do," Kris said, nodding.
"Stop right there," Doug raised his hand. "Then give it to him, son. Adam needs to feel loved and if you can make him feel secure then he'll always be there for you."
"You sound like you really know him."
"We've talked a bit here and there over the years," Doug explained. "He's a good man who's been hurt. When he talks about you, he sounds happy. I like that. I'm an old settled queen who wants everyone to feel the same contentment that I do."
Nothing mattered more to Kris than making Adam happy. Maybe if he just let go with Adam then he would find the security that he needed himself. It was just a matter of faith and Kris had always lived that way so why should his relationship with Adam be any different? Shouldn’t he trust his relationship with Adam to God?
There was no way to separate only a portion of his life from God so to be complete he needed to bring them together. It would be the only way to truly be the light for Adam, too. In admitting this to himself, he felt a dark part of his heart give way to the light and he was ready to move forward. He smiled at Doug.
"Thank you," Kris said. "For the Tylenol which seems to have worked and for talking to me. I appreciate it."
"Good," Doug said. "Call me anytime." He slipped an arm around Kris's shoulder to start leading him back down the hallway. "I like you crazy kids and would love to hear how things go with you two. Now, let's go find your man."
"I'll do that," Kris said. "Maybe the four of us can do dinner or something."
"Lovely," Doug stepped out into the fray of the party. He scanned the room and then pointed. "There's Adam." He leaned closer to Kris. "Play along. Give an old man a thrill."
"Okay," Kris said, with a smile that he suppressed when they got closer to Adam. He didn't know what Doug had in mind, but he wanted to be ready. Not that he could act but he'd try it.
"Oh there you are," Doug said, taking Adam's arm. "We were looking for you."
"Where were you?" Adam asked. "I turned around and you were gone."
"Don't be a fusspot," Doug said. "I got him some medicine and darling, I couldn’t resist."
"What do you mean?"
Kris could feel Adam's eyes studying him. He stared down at his shoe with his hands shoved in his pockets.
"Your boy is so adorable," Doug continued. "I told him that all the newbies have to give me a blowjob as part of the initiation rites." He patted Adam on the back while smiling at Kris. "Kris is really special. You've taught him well. Now, I'll leave you alone." He kissed Kris's cheek. "See you later."
Kris was biting the inside of his cheek trying not to laugh. Adam's stepped closer to him as his fingers lifted Kris's chin so that he was forced to look at Adam. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't stop himself from busting out laughing. At least he did until Adam bent down until their noses were almost touching.
"You think it's funny to tease your man like that?" Adam's voice rolled over him like silk but Kris could hear the anger threading through his words.
"Sorry, but come on," Kris said, shrugging, but his stomach was dropping at the seriousness on Adam’s face. "It was a joke."
"You do not ever, ever, play at making me jealous," Adam said, with eyebrows raised.
"Adam," Kris started, but found himself jerked off his feet as Adam pulled him through the room. Kris didn't look around. He didn't want to see anyone staring at them. He felt humiliated. They'd been getting along since their last blow up and it was the last thing he wanted tonight. Hopefully, they were going somewhere private where he already knew he would beg if it would keep Adam from being any angrier. He was relieved when they entered a room just inside the first hallway. It was a small sitting room. Kris jumped when Adam slammed the door behind them and shut the light off with the next motion.
"Would you listen to me?" Kris turned as Adam grabbed his shoulders, walking him backward until he hit the wall. A painting on the wall rattled from the force. He swallowed hard as he looked up into the coldness of Adam's face.
"No," Adam with a growl. He started to undo Kris's belt buckle. "You crossed a line…an unforgivable line."
"What are you doing?" Kris stammered as Adam shoved his pants down his hips. His first thought was that Adam was going to spank him. He wasn't sure if he was afraid of Adam, ashamed that someone would find out or a little thrilled at the thought of Adam’s bare hand on his ass. A voice outside the door brought him quickly back to the reality of where they were and that they hadn’t locked the door. "Stop," he yelped, grabbing for his pants.
"You have to be punished," Adam grinned, dropping to his knees.
"Oh shit," Kris said when Adam took him into his mouth with no foreplay. His cock was in Adam's mouth to the hilt. Adam’s soft exhale ruffled his pubic hair sending a warm drift over his flesh.
Someone could walk in and, despite the supposed safety of this party, it could end up splashed all over the internet in a matter of hours.
Adam sucked hard while his tongue rolled around his shaft sending desire racing through him.
Someone was right outside the door. Laughter echoed down the hallway.
Adam lapped at the head of his cock. Kris’s reached to grab Adam's hair so he could bury himself in the wet heat of Adam’s mouth again.
Something or someone jangled the door.
All of a sudden it didn’t matter to Kris if someone did walk in the room.
"Who the fuck cares?" Kris muttered, trying to convince himself. An all consuming heat stole over his flesh rocking him on his feet. He raised his arms along the wall as his fingers scrabbled for something to hold himself up. Anything to keep from diving his fingers into Adam’s hair. That would upset Adam and he would hate to see the punishment for that sin.
Adam pulled his pants down until they were around his knees without ever giving up sucking him off. A shiver ran down his spine when Adam's finger teased at his ass.
“Do it,” Kris pleaded. “Please…Adam.”
Kris could almost see Adam grin, but he got what he wanted. Adam pushed his finger deep into his ass while his thumb rubbed against the sensitive place between his anus and his balls. It was like lightning striking as his pelvis tightened with intense ecstasy. Kris came in a violent shuddering that left his knees giving way. Thankfully, Adam was there to hold him up. He buried his face in Adam's chest as he tried to stop panting. At least he did until he could feel the rumble of Adam's chest from laughter. Kris swatted at him but knew he deserved to be the object of his mirth.
Something gave inside Kris. He'd tried to walk the line since beginning a relationship with his Idol co-star. A line of still being the good boy that his family expected and America saw when they watched him and being the man that Adam wanted. He'd known all along that Adam often reigned in his passions so as not to shock Kris or ask him to do something he was uncomfortable performing. It wasn't fair. Adam had been everything that Kris had asked him to be since their fight and it was time for Kris to give back. He raised his head to look Adam straight in the eyes. He didn't want to miss the reaction to his next words.
"I want your cock buried as far inside of me as it can get," Kris said, proud that he didn't blush or stammer. "And I want you to fuck me hard."
It was worth it as Adam's eyes opened wide and his jaw dropped. Kris took advantage as he pulled Adam down for a kiss that made his intentions clear. Adam pushed him against the wall, their tongues tumbling together as Kris pulled his pants back up. He wasn't ready to be fucked in Doug's house yet.
"Take me home," Kris commanded.
There was no argument. Adam pulled his phone out to call Ceci to pull the car around to the front of the house. Grabbing his hand, Adam pulled him through the crowd. Doug was watching them. Kris waved to him then gave him a thumbs up. He knew he'd made a new friend, but right now, he wanted Adam. Ceci already had the car running as they burst through the front door. Kris felt like he was flying with the speed that Adam was pulling him. He was pushed into the back seat with Adam climbing in practically on top of him.
Kris didn't move far. As soon as the door was closed and the car was moving down the driveway and without any pretense he straddled Adam. He didn't even care that Ceci was in the front seat. He needed Adam who obviously needed him because his hands immediately went to hold onto Kris's hips.
Later he would be thankful that the windows were tinted as he played the aggressor. Adam laid his head back, sliding down so their pelvises were straining against one another while Kris alternated between kissing Adam's lips and nibbling his neck. Kris was lost in passionate haze as his desire built with no way to relieve it. He wasn't sure how far he'd go if they didn't get back to the mansion soon.
"Okay, you two," Ceci said interrupting them. "Separate or do I have to get the hose?"
"We're at the mansion," Adam panted while pushing on Kris's shoulders.
Kris wiped at his face while to push the lust induced fog away. Glancing out the window, he realized that they weren't all the way to the front door where anyone could walk out. He made a mental note to thank Ceci later for his discretion.
"Go around to the side door," Ceci instructed. "I'll unlock it and let you in. Remember there are security cameras so pull the shirts out." He chuckled. "And I expect a fucking big tip for this one."
"No problem," Kris said, smiling as he tried to climb out as if he wasn't hard as a rock and shivering with a combination of desire and the cool California night. It didn't help that Adam was several feet away.
Somehow, they managed to get to the side door. It was unlocked just as Ceci promised, but once they were inside, they exploded. Kris grabbed Adam's hand, pulling him this time in his wake. Except those long legs on Adam kept making Adam have to slow down so he didn't plow Kris down. They jumped down the stairs and raced to Adam's room.
"Fucking horny bastard," Adam said, reaching to undo Kris's pants again. "Who the hell gave you all the green M&Ms?"
"Complaining?" Kris asked while his own hands were busy undoing Adam's jeans. He was spun around and pushed face first on the bed. "Hey, don't damage the goods," Kris said as he landed with a bounce.
"It's bendable," Adam said, lifting Kris's legs up so that he could remove his shoes and pants. Then he was crawling on top of him. "And no I'm not complaining." He shoved Kris's shirt up as he squirted lube on Kris's ass. There was no tender preparation before he felt Adam's dick at his entrance. "You ready?"
"Would you fuck me already?" Kris grunted, grabbing the edge of the mattress as Adam thrust into him. He cried out as he was driven into the bed, but Adam didn't stop pounding into him. Then he slowed his movements almost making Kris scream in frustration.
Adam covered him, his hands holding onto Kris's hips as he slowly pumped in and out of him. "You want to try something new?"
Kris laughed, but answered yes. At this point, he was game for anything, but he was surprised when Adam rolled them over so that Kris was on top. Except because of the way they'd started out, he was facing away from Adam. He rearranged his legs so that he was kneeling over Adam. They'd never done it like this, always preferring to face one another when they made love. Except this wasn't love, this was fucking, and Kris was finding the thrill in it.
His eyes closed as his world narrowed to the cock he was riding and the cock in his hand. Adam had done this for him. Somehow, he'd known that a part of Kris was breaking free tonight and wanted him to take it where he wanted. If it wasn't for Adam beneath him and his fingers digging into Kris's hips, Kris could have been alone.
He ran his hand up and down his cock as he fashioned the movement of his ride with the stroking his cock. For the first time he could honestly say he was enjoying anal sex. He'd found just the right movement to bring him the most pleasure. The world disappeared as he lost himself in his own gratification. Not even Adam mattered anymore as he felt himself giving into a long denied hunger.
When he came, it was too soon. It took a moment for the world to intrude as he tried to find his breath. Kris blinked as things came into focus and he caught Adam watching him in the mirror. The combination of love and need on his face gave Kris validation that he was truly wanted. Maybe this wasn't what a good boy did even in the privacy of his bedroom, but here he was Adam's and he just had to be himself.
"Your turn," Kris grinned.
That was all Adam needed to flip them again. Adam had his hands planted on either side of Kris.
"You want to get fucked hard, baby?"
"Please, Big Daddy," Kris answered, laughing with the headiness of the night.
"My pleasure," Adam said, slamming deep into him.
Never before had Adam had taken so little care with him. Kris felt he was being hammered into as Adam gave in to his own need. To give Adam the freedom to find his own ecstasy was just as thrilling as finding his own. He was just thankful that his head was over the edge of the bed so that he could breathe. The difference in their sizes had never been an issue before until he was face down on the bed with Adam on top of him. Kris gripped the edge of the bed, pushing back so they didn't go sliding over the edge. The moment Adam lost control he bit down on Kris's shoulder as his body convulsed from his orgasm.
"Damn," Adam said a few minutes later as he rolled off Kris. "I mean wow…," he laughed. "I don't even have the words for it."
"Kick awesome?" Kris offered.
"Yeah, fucking kick awesome," Adam laughed.
…to be continued