(no subject)
After an absurd amount of effort, I've managed to condense my huge oversized shelf full of densely packed DVDs into a single indexed, alphabetized box, glimmering with a futuristic aluminum glaze and the sweet lustre of obsessive compulsion.
A thing of beauty, yes? I think so. And now that slim and handsome messenger's case, suitable for deflecting bullets or bashing an unsuspecting and broodingly handsome spy from behind in a curtained compartment of a train roaring below some snow-heaped Alp, holds enough media to watch movies in that quiet compartment non-stop from Zurich to Singapore and back.
That trash heap behind it is not some oracle for felt cave-dwellers, but is in fact the detritus left behind, the mortal coils shed by my DVD collection as they ascended to their anodized heaven. It's a thing of Zen beauty, like dancing skeletons (which are also a thing of Judaic beauty, if you recall your Elijah, and also of Catholic beauty, as you'll no doubt remember from your celebration to[yester]day of El Dia de Los Muertos).
And since I want to feel like I really accomplished something, I tried indexing these things with some useful, meaningful system, but eye strain prevented me from reading the ISBN numbers to enter them at any speed into Library Thing, although I should finish doing my books there some day so that I can have a record of all the books destroyed in Hurricane Cassandra (see what I did there?), and while vruba pointed me towards Delicious Library, the iSight barcode scanner proved to be so persnickety that it was easier for me to just come up with my own gimcrack system.
So I entered the name of every DVD as I shoveled them off the shelf (this was also nice in preference to the automated systems as I own a surprising number of DVDs with no ISBNs, UPCs, or indeed, any sort of legalistic markings on them at all, such as the Mind Trip DVD I had autographed by Daizee Haze at the Florida International Pro show a while back), and then I used the Alphabetizer to sort them out. Then I pulled them out of their cases in alphabetized order and slung them into the little DVD envelopes, hung them them in the case, and proceeded apace. Where necessary, I edited the list to allow 2-disc sets to remain together in a double-sided envelope, and also notated which DVDs had more than one disc in the case, and ALSO which boxed sets I intended to keep intact, and ALSO which DVDs were TV shows and which were movies/documentaries. Quite a piece of work, all told, and now I have a neatly-sorted little metal case of 168 movie discs and 26 television show DVDs fronted by 32 boxed sets comprising 89 discs. With the excess shelf room, I intend to put up the pile of books I've had by my bed so they stop getting knocked over and kicked across the room and stepped on by my dog and having gin dumped all over them by drunken jerks who sit up bellowing obscenities when the alarm goes off for their day of Applemployment and knock over their traditional bedside Mason jar of gin with their pre-conscious flailings.
Also, in case my computer is destroyed when a dog mauls it to death or someone pours gin all over it, and for the edification of my rapt Children of the Revolution, I'll post herein the list of all my movies, television shows, wrestling programs, mockumentaries, documentaries, bonus materials, cartoons, flicks, cinematics, and underground reels narrated by Bela Lugosi.
1.8 Heads in a Duffel Bag
2.28 Days Later
3.1408 1
4.1408 2
5.Adaptation
6.Addams Family/Addams Family Values
7.Alfred Hitchcock Collection: Jamaica Inn/Sabotage/The 39 Steps/Easy Virtue
8.Alice in Wonderland (NBC)
9.Alien Nation
10.Amadeus
11.The Amazing Screw-On Head
12.American Beauty
13.American Psycho
14.Anchorman
15.The Animatrix
16.The Batman-Superman Movie
17.Batman: The Movie
18.Batman Begins
19.Bela Lugosi Meets a Brooklyn Gorilla
20.The Big Hit
21.The Big Lebowski
22.Big Trouble in Little China
23.Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey
24.Blackbeard
25.Borat
26.Bubba Ho-Tep
27.The Calamari Wrestler
28.Capote
29.The Cat's Meow
30.Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
31.Chicago
32.Clerks II
33.Clue
34.The Compleat Al
35.Conspiracy Theory
36.Creepshow
37.Dark City
38.Darkman
39.Deathtrap
40.Deep Blue Sea
41.Deja Vu
42.Dick Tracy
43.Donnie Darko
44.Enemy Mine
45.Enter the Dragon
46.Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
47.The Fifth Element 1
48.The Fifth Element 2
49.Ferris Bueller's Day Off @
50.Fletch
51.The Fly 1
52.The Fly 2
53.The Full Monty
54.G.I. Joe the Movie
55.George Lucas in Love
56.Ghost Dog
57.Godzilla 2000
58.Good Night and Good Luck
59.Greetings
60.Gremlins
61.Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone 1
62.Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone 2
63.Hackers @
64.Hellboy: Sword of Storms
65.History of the World Part 1
66.The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
67.Hook
68.Horror Classics: Carnival of Souls/White Zombie/Casper The Friendly Ghost
69.House of Flying Daggers
70.Idiocracy
71.The Incredibles 1
72.The Incredibles 2
73.Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back 1
74.Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back 2
75.Iron Monkey @
76.Joe's Apartment
77.Joe vs. the Volcano
78.Johnny Mnemonic
79.Kill Bill
80.Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
81.Kung Fu Hustle
82.The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
83.Little Shop of Horrors
84.Logan's Run
85.The Manchurian Candidate
86.The Matrix
87.Matrix Reloaded 1
88.Matrix Reloaded 2
89.Mazes and Monsters
90.A Mighty Wind
91.The Monster Squad 1
92.The Monster Squad 2
93.Monty Python's The Meaning of Life 1
94.Monty Python's The Meaning of Life 2
95.Monty Python Live! 1
96.Monty Python Live! 2
97.Monty Python and the Holy Grail 1
98.Monty Python and the Holy Grail 2
99.Mondo Balordo @
100.Mystery Men @
101.The Muppet Christmas Carol
102.A Muppet Family Christmas
103.The Muppet Movie
104.Muppet Treasure Island
105.Napoleon Dynamite
106.Natural Born Killers
107.A Night at the Roxbury
108.Office Space
109.Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl 1
110.Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl 2
111.Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
112.Pi @
113.Pleasantville
114.The Princess Bride
115.The Producers
116.R2-D2: Beneath the Dome
117.Return to the Batcave
118.The Road Warrior/Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome @
119.The Rise and Fall of ECW 1
120.The Rise and Fall of ECW 2
121.Robin Hood
122.Robin Hood: Men in Tights
123.Ronald Reagan: This Is The Army
124.The Rundown
125.Samurai Jack: The Premiere Movie
126.Santa's Slay
127.A Scanner Darkly
128.A Series of Unfortunate Events
129.Seven
130.Shaun of the Dead
131.Short Circuit
132.Shrek 1
133.Shrek 2
134.Shrek II
135.Silent Horror: Nosferatu/The Phantom of the Opera/Little Red Riding Hood
136.Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
137.South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut
138.Strange Brew @
139.Spider-Man 1
140.Spider-Man 2
141.Spider-Man II 1
142.Spider-Man II 2
143.Spirited Away 1
144.Spirited Away 2
145.Stranger Than Fiction
146.Super Size Me
147.Superman The Movie
148.Superman II
149.TMNT
150.Tampopo
151.Tank Girl
152.Tenacious D: The Pick of Destiny
153.Terror Attack: The Screaming Skull/A Bucket of Blood/Hansel and Gretel
154.Thank You For Smoking
155.They Live
156.Three Amigos
157.Threshold of Terror: Bluebeard/Mechanical Monsters/House on Haunted Hill
158.Time Bandits
159.Twilight Zone: The Movie
160.UHF
161.V for Vendetta 1
162.V for Vendetta 2
163.Ultimate Avengers: The Movie @
164.Wayne's World/Wayne's World II
165.Willard
166.Yokai Monsters
167.Young Frankenstein
168.Zoolander
*****
169.Batman: The Animated Series - The Legend Begins
170.Cartoon Craze: Looney Tunes @
171.Bucky O'Hare The Complete Series 1
172.Bucky O'Hare The Complete Series 2
173.Cartoon Craze: Superman
174.ECW One Night Stand
175.ECW Wrestlepalooza '97
176.Futurama Season 2 Disc 2
177.Futurama Season 2 Disc 4
178.Garfield Fantasies
179.Justice League: The Brave and the Bold
180.Justice League Unlimited: Saving the World
181.Mick Foley's Greatest Hits and Misses 1
182.Mick Foley's Greatest Hits and Misses 2
183.Popeye: One Full Hour
184.Toon Factory: Popeye
185.Ray Bradbury Theater 1
186.Ray Bradbury Theater 2
187.Saturday Night Live The Best of Chris Farley
188.The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes @
189.TNA: Best of the X-Division - Volume 1
190.TNA: Best of the X-Division - Volume 2
191.The Best of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe 1
192.The Best of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe 2
193.The Lone Ranger
194.Toon Factory: Looney Tunes
*****
1 An Evening with Kevin Smith (1 & 2)
2 Daizee Haze: Mind Trip
3 Darkwing Duck Volume One (1 & 2 & 3)
4 Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1 & 2)
5 Fight Club (1 & 2)
6 Firefly: The Complete Series (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
7 Flash Gordon
8 Hellboy (1 & 2)
9 Looney Tunes Spotlight Collection (1 & 2)
10 Moulin Rouge (1 & 2)
11 Pinky and the Brain Volume One (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
12 Pulp Fiction (1 & 2)
13 Robert Rodriguez' Mexico Trilogy (El Mariachi, Desperado, Once Upon a Time in Mexico)
14 Sin City (1 & 2)
15 Star Wars Trilogy (A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi, Bonus Material)
16 T2: Judgment Day (1 & 2)
17 The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr. (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
18 The Adventures of Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark, The Temple of Doom, The Last Crusade, Bonus Materials)
19 The Karate Kid Collection (Karate Kid, Karate Kid II, Karate Kid III, The Next Karate Kid)
20 The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
21 The Muppet Show Season One (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
22 The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1 & 2)
23 The Simpsons: Complete 2nd Season (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
24 The Simpsons: Complete 4th Season (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
25 The Simpsons: Complete 5th Season (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
26 The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror
27 The Tick vs. Season One (1 & 2)
28 The Weird Al Show: The Complete Series (1 & 2 & 3)
29 Tremors Attack Pack (Tremors, Tremors 2: Aftershocks, Tremors 3: Back to Perfection, Tremors 4: The Legend Begins)
30 Unbreakable (1 & 2)
31 WWE The History of the Championship (1 & 2 & 3)
32 WWE The Ladder Match (1 & 2 & 3)
The WMLCE-MPDA is open to the public anytime anyone drops by with food or booze or an addition to the collection. Contact the Archivist for information on borrowing procedures, and make sure you have access to a copy of your full genetic profile and NSA records.
A thing of beauty, yes? I think so. And now that slim and handsome messenger's case, suitable for deflecting bullets or bashing an unsuspecting and broodingly handsome spy from behind in a curtained compartment of a train roaring below some snow-heaped Alp, holds enough media to watch movies in that quiet compartment non-stop from Zurich to Singapore and back.
That trash heap behind it is not some oracle for felt cave-dwellers, but is in fact the detritus left behind, the mortal coils shed by my DVD collection as they ascended to their anodized heaven. It's a thing of Zen beauty, like dancing skeletons (which are also a thing of Judaic beauty, if you recall your Elijah, and also of Catholic beauty, as you'll no doubt remember from your celebration to[yester]day of El Dia de Los Muertos).
And since I want to feel like I really accomplished something, I tried indexing these things with some useful, meaningful system, but eye strain prevented me from reading the ISBN numbers to enter them at any speed into Library Thing, although I should finish doing my books there some day so that I can have a record of all the books destroyed in Hurricane Cassandra (see what I did there?), and while vruba pointed me towards Delicious Library, the iSight barcode scanner proved to be so persnickety that it was easier for me to just come up with my own gimcrack system.
So I entered the name of every DVD as I shoveled them off the shelf (this was also nice in preference to the automated systems as I own a surprising number of DVDs with no ISBNs, UPCs, or indeed, any sort of legalistic markings on them at all, such as the Mind Trip DVD I had autographed by Daizee Haze at the Florida International Pro show a while back), and then I used the Alphabetizer to sort them out. Then I pulled them out of their cases in alphabetized order and slung them into the little DVD envelopes, hung them them in the case, and proceeded apace. Where necessary, I edited the list to allow 2-disc sets to remain together in a double-sided envelope, and also notated which DVDs had more than one disc in the case, and ALSO which boxed sets I intended to keep intact, and ALSO which DVDs were TV shows and which were movies/documentaries. Quite a piece of work, all told, and now I have a neatly-sorted little metal case of 168 movie discs and 26 television show DVDs fronted by 32 boxed sets comprising 89 discs. With the excess shelf room, I intend to put up the pile of books I've had by my bed so they stop getting knocked over and kicked across the room and stepped on by my dog and having gin dumped all over them by drunken jerks who sit up bellowing obscenities when the alarm goes off for their day of Applemployment and knock over their traditional bedside Mason jar of gin with their pre-conscious flailings.
Also, in case my computer is destroyed when a dog mauls it to death or someone pours gin all over it, and for the edification of my rapt Children of the Revolution, I'll post herein the list of all my movies, television shows, wrestling programs, mockumentaries, documentaries, bonus materials, cartoons, flicks, cinematics, and underground reels narrated by Bela Lugosi.
1.8 Heads in a Duffel Bag
2.28 Days Later
3.1408 1
4.1408 2
5.Adaptation
6.Addams Family/Addams Family Values
7.Alfred Hitchcock Collection: Jamaica Inn/Sabotage/The 39 Steps/Easy Virtue
8.Alice in Wonderland (NBC)
9.Alien Nation
10.Amadeus
11.The Amazing Screw-On Head
12.American Beauty
13.American Psycho
14.Anchorman
15.The Animatrix
16.The Batman-Superman Movie
17.Batman: The Movie
18.Batman Begins
19.Bela Lugosi Meets a Brooklyn Gorilla
20.The Big Hit
21.The Big Lebowski
22.Big Trouble in Little China
23.Bill and Ted's Bogus Journey
24.Blackbeard
25.Borat
26.Bubba Ho-Tep
27.The Calamari Wrestler
28.Capote
29.The Cat's Meow
30.Charlie and the Chocolate Factory
31.Chicago
32.Clerks II
33.Clue
34.The Compleat Al
35.Conspiracy Theory
36.Creepshow
37.Dark City
38.Darkman
39.Deathtrap
40.Deep Blue Sea
41.Deja Vu
42.Dick Tracy
43.Donnie Darko
44.Enemy Mine
45.Enter the Dragon
46.Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
47.The Fifth Element 1
48.The Fifth Element 2
49.Ferris Bueller's Day Off @
50.Fletch
51.The Fly 1
52.The Fly 2
53.The Full Monty
54.G.I. Joe the Movie
55.George Lucas in Love
56.Ghost Dog
57.Godzilla 2000
58.Good Night and Good Luck
59.Greetings
60.Gremlins
61.Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone 1
62.Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone 2
63.Hackers @
64.Hellboy: Sword of Storms
65.History of the World Part 1
66.The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
67.Hook
68.Horror Classics: Carnival of Souls/White Zombie/Casper The Friendly Ghost
69.House of Flying Daggers
70.Idiocracy
71.The Incredibles 1
72.The Incredibles 2
73.Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back 1
74.Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back 2
75.Iron Monkey @
76.Joe's Apartment
77.Joe vs. the Volcano
78.Johnny Mnemonic
79.Kill Bill
80.Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
81.Kung Fu Hustle
82.The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou
83.Little Shop of Horrors
84.Logan's Run
85.The Manchurian Candidate
86.The Matrix
87.Matrix Reloaded 1
88.Matrix Reloaded 2
89.Mazes and Monsters
90.A Mighty Wind
91.The Monster Squad 1
92.The Monster Squad 2
93.Monty Python's The Meaning of Life 1
94.Monty Python's The Meaning of Life 2
95.Monty Python Live! 1
96.Monty Python Live! 2
97.Monty Python and the Holy Grail 1
98.Monty Python and the Holy Grail 2
99.Mondo Balordo @
100.Mystery Men @
101.The Muppet Christmas Carol
102.A Muppet Family Christmas
103.The Muppet Movie
104.Muppet Treasure Island
105.Napoleon Dynamite
106.Natural Born Killers
107.A Night at the Roxbury
108.Office Space
109.Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl 1
110.Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl 2
111.Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest
112.Pi @
113.Pleasantville
114.The Princess Bride
115.The Producers
116.R2-D2: Beneath the Dome
117.Return to the Batcave
118.The Road Warrior/Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome @
119.The Rise and Fall of ECW 1
120.The Rise and Fall of ECW 2
121.Robin Hood
122.Robin Hood: Men in Tights
123.Ronald Reagan: This Is The Army
124.The Rundown
125.Samurai Jack: The Premiere Movie
126.Santa's Slay
127.A Scanner Darkly
128.A Series of Unfortunate Events
129.Seven
130.Shaun of the Dead
131.Short Circuit
132.Shrek 1
133.Shrek 2
134.Shrek II
135.Silent Horror: Nosferatu/The Phantom of the Opera/Little Red Riding Hood
136.Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow
137.South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut
138.Strange Brew @
139.Spider-Man 1
140.Spider-Man 2
141.Spider-Man II 1
142.Spider-Man II 2
143.Spirited Away 1
144.Spirited Away 2
145.Stranger Than Fiction
146.Super Size Me
147.Superman The Movie
148.Superman II
149.TMNT
150.Tampopo
151.Tank Girl
152.Tenacious D: The Pick of Destiny
153.Terror Attack: The Screaming Skull/A Bucket of Blood/Hansel and Gretel
154.Thank You For Smoking
155.They Live
156.Three Amigos
157.Threshold of Terror: Bluebeard/Mechanical Monsters/House on Haunted Hill
158.Time Bandits
159.Twilight Zone: The Movie
160.UHF
161.V for Vendetta 1
162.V for Vendetta 2
163.Ultimate Avengers: The Movie @
164.Wayne's World/Wayne's World II
165.Willard
166.Yokai Monsters
167.Young Frankenstein
168.Zoolander
*****
169.Batman: The Animated Series - The Legend Begins
170.Cartoon Craze: Looney Tunes @
171.Bucky O'Hare The Complete Series 1
172.Bucky O'Hare The Complete Series 2
173.Cartoon Craze: Superman
174.ECW One Night Stand
175.ECW Wrestlepalooza '97
176.Futurama Season 2 Disc 2
177.Futurama Season 2 Disc 4
178.Garfield Fantasies
179.Justice League: The Brave and the Bold
180.Justice League Unlimited: Saving the World
181.Mick Foley's Greatest Hits and Misses 1
182.Mick Foley's Greatest Hits and Misses 2
183.Popeye: One Full Hour
184.Toon Factory: Popeye
185.Ray Bradbury Theater 1
186.Ray Bradbury Theater 2
187.Saturday Night Live The Best of Chris Farley
188.The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes @
189.TNA: Best of the X-Division - Volume 1
190.TNA: Best of the X-Division - Volume 2
191.The Best of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe 1
192.The Best of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe 2
193.The Lone Ranger
194.Toon Factory: Looney Tunes
*****
1 An Evening with Kevin Smith (1 & 2)
2 Daizee Haze: Mind Trip
3 Darkwing Duck Volume One (1 & 2 & 3)
4 Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1 & 2)
5 Fight Club (1 & 2)
6 Firefly: The Complete Series (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
7 Flash Gordon
8 Hellboy (1 & 2)
9 Looney Tunes Spotlight Collection (1 & 2)
10 Moulin Rouge (1 & 2)
11 Pinky and the Brain Volume One (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
12 Pulp Fiction (1 & 2)
13 Robert Rodriguez' Mexico Trilogy (El Mariachi, Desperado, Once Upon a Time in Mexico)
14 Sin City (1 & 2)
15 Star Wars Trilogy (A New Hope, The Empire Strikes Back, Return of the Jedi, Bonus Material)
16 T2: Judgment Day (1 & 2)
17 The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr. (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
18 The Adventures of Indiana Jones (Raiders of the Lost Ark, The Temple of Doom, The Last Crusade, Bonus Materials)
19 The Karate Kid Collection (Karate Kid, Karate Kid II, Karate Kid III, The Next Karate Kid)
20 The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
21 The Muppet Show Season One (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
22 The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1 & 2)
23 The Simpsons: Complete 2nd Season (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
24 The Simpsons: Complete 4th Season (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
25 The Simpsons: Complete 5th Season (1 & 2 & 3 & 4)
26 The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror
27 The Tick vs. Season One (1 & 2)
28 The Weird Al Show: The Complete Series (1 & 2 & 3)
29 Tremors Attack Pack (Tremors, Tremors 2: Aftershocks, Tremors 3: Back to Perfection, Tremors 4: The Legend Begins)
30 Unbreakable (1 & 2)
31 WWE The History of the Championship (1 & 2 & 3)
32 WWE The Ladder Match (1 & 2 & 3)
The WMLCE-MPDA is open to the public anytime anyone drops by with food or booze or an addition to the collection. Contact the Archivist for information on borrowing procedures, and make sure you have access to a copy of your full genetic profile and NSA records.