screaming out loud
things have been so messed up today and they just havent gotten better. i might have to be facing a man that makes me feel less then shit. walking into a school that never gave a damn bout anything that is going on with me. so i have been fighting with my parents bout that but i dont think they are understanding me at all. everytime i try to get my point across i am cut off by one of their remarks. i just wish someone would understand how much pain that brings me. i have so much to let go from there that i havent so if anything i was said to me i would sure as hell lose it. my parents arent understanding that and i dont think they ever will. i think i am going to be the most missunderstood person there ever lived on this earth. no matter how hard i try to explain myself ppl cut me off with stories of their own experiances saying they truely understand. if they understood like they tell me they do then they wouldnt cut me off. they would let me vent it all out so i dont have to hold it in like i am doing now. all its doing is bringing me farther from where i want to be now. sometimes i dont think they even notice my feelings anymore. its just like oh well there goes lindsey complaining again. but all i am doing is letting out my surpressed anger and sadness but they dont understand that so i dont see how they can tell me i am going to be here for you no matter what. if they were going to be there for me they would try to understand everything i am letting out of myself but they dont do that. only very few do and its so hard to find them around anymore. i just want to scream out why cant someone understand me and just be there when i need them. but i am left to struggle through this battle alone. my net lay broken below me just waiting for me to fall knowing its not going to catch me.