(no subject)
i'm sorry for my absence.. but i've been doing quite a lot of thinking lately, of what i really want out of life and i'm actually wondering why so many things are happening and asking lots of whys. Perhaps doing this isnt really what I want. Something's telling me to give up everything i have now and do something different. I have no idea what. This might sound absurd. Maybe i'm just going through a phase. I don't know but perhaps I'm starting to realise that what I'm doing comes a lot from family pressure and societal pressure. Perhaps this is not what I want and perhaps this is not what I am. Maybe the conventional route of getting a degree locally and then getting a job and subsequently starting a family isn't what I want. It is just want society wants out of me. How is it only that I do things in a certain way will people really nod their heads in approval? Or does their approval really matter to me? Why can't I do something different, like step out for once and live the way I want things to be. Why are we restricted to earth. I don't understand a lot of things. Not just the things that are happening in our daily lives, not just the trivial issues. I guess there's just too many questions and too much uncertainty right now. Perhaps i'll snap out of this one day