don't say i didnt warn you of incoming sappy shit
jesus h tapdancing christ on a crutch, this sucks. but what would you think would happen when you spend all but 5 days out of 3 and a half months together daily? since i'm completely transparent i guess then its pretty obvious that i've become pretty attached, eh? I just can't get my head on straight, im forgetting stuff (more). i was on autopilot all day today, and i paid for that by overextending the thumb on my left hand the same as i did to my right a couple months ago. holy shit that hurt, i couldnt squeeze anything for the rest of the day. meh.
i suppose i'm lucky. after college there's not going to be any "who moves where, who makes new friends" arguments. and its only until may. Cait's got her car up there so we can break up the driving, and she'll be home for the weekend that's our 8-month. (yes, i still count months. i warned you so shut your piehole.) otherwise we'll see how good i am at controlling my impulse to take the 3 hour ride to rhode island. i don't think my control will win out in the end, but its not fair to her to have me 1) hanging around bothering her while shes trying to finish her last year of school, or 2) unintentionally making her feel guilty about leaving me to my own devices. I just hope my streak of non-paranoia holds out, i was fine all last semester.
it didnt hit me until i was up there with Cait, going to dinner on the day we moved her in. all summer, the last weekend, all that shit, even the ride up and unloading the car. then bam, there was the pain. i was zoned out from dinner (5 ish) till like 9.30 that night. put me to work, i assembled her new computer desk, just to keep myself occupied because when i get upset or something on my mind, i have to take something apart or put it together. it was a small consolation when she reminded me that the next time we move all this shit it'll be to shack up with me, and i appreciated the effort in any event. but in any event, here i sit, at a time of day when all summer we'd be together. alone with my thoughts, (i can hear the "i thought i smelled smoke" jokes out there) and i'm drawing a blank on everything except for being annoyed at cingular for dropping my call a record 5 or so times, and counting out the days until we're together again.
wow this turned into half lj entry, half letter to cait.
i miss you.
i suppose i'm lucky. after college there's not going to be any "who moves where, who makes new friends" arguments. and its only until may. Cait's got her car up there so we can break up the driving, and she'll be home for the weekend that's our 8-month. (yes, i still count months. i warned you so shut your piehole.) otherwise we'll see how good i am at controlling my impulse to take the 3 hour ride to rhode island. i don't think my control will win out in the end, but its not fair to her to have me 1) hanging around bothering her while shes trying to finish her last year of school, or 2) unintentionally making her feel guilty about leaving me to my own devices. I just hope my streak of non-paranoia holds out, i was fine all last semester.
it didnt hit me until i was up there with Cait, going to dinner on the day we moved her in. all summer, the last weekend, all that shit, even the ride up and unloading the car. then bam, there was the pain. i was zoned out from dinner (5 ish) till like 9.30 that night. put me to work, i assembled her new computer desk, just to keep myself occupied because when i get upset or something on my mind, i have to take something apart or put it together. it was a small consolation when she reminded me that the next time we move all this shit it'll be to shack up with me, and i appreciated the effort in any event. but in any event, here i sit, at a time of day when all summer we'd be together. alone with my thoughts, (i can hear the "i thought i smelled smoke" jokes out there) and i'm drawing a blank on everything except for being annoyed at cingular for dropping my call a record 5 or so times, and counting out the days until we're together again.
wow this turned into half lj entry, half letter to cait.
i miss you.