I'm insane. No, seriously.
Ahhhhhhhhhh! I am so hungry! I've only had some yogurt and blueberries to eat today. But fret not, I don't have an eating disorder. I just want myself to be hungry so I'll be able to eat as much delicious free food as I possibly can tonight when we go out to dinner for father's day. But in the meantime my empty stomach feels like a rumbling tub of misery. I really don't know how anorexics can do it. In other news, I had the strangest dream last night....
*DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU ARE VERY SENSITIVE TO DISTURBING THINGS* I had a dream that I was on a boat, and there was a fifty-year-old obese man who had been hiding there. He decided it would be a fine idea to rape me. This alone was a nightmare, but it gets worse. The next day, I was walking down an alley and I saw the old man. I was filled with anger so I ran up to him and hit him on the head and he went down. Then for some reason I had a penis, although I didn't have one the day before. I raped him through his belly button. It was graphic and disgusting, and after I was done I ran off feeling guilty. This was definitely the most disturbing dream I can remember ever having. Hopefully it means something completely benign, and it isn't a sign that I'm losing it.
*DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU ARE VERY SENSITIVE TO DISTURBING THINGS* I had a dream that I was on a boat, and there was a fifty-year-old obese man who had been hiding there. He decided it would be a fine idea to rape me. This alone was a nightmare, but it gets worse. The next day, I was walking down an alley and I saw the old man. I was filled with anger so I ran up to him and hit him on the head and he went down. Then for some reason I had a penis, although I didn't have one the day before. I raped him through his belly button. It was graphic and disgusting, and after I was done I ran off feeling guilty. This was definitely the most disturbing dream I can remember ever having. Hopefully it means something completely benign, and it isn't a sign that I'm losing it.