White.Noise
Hm. So here I am. I think I'm beginning to fall back into whatever depression I was in last year. I think the whole Charlotte deal set it off. I don't know. It kind of sucks, Like, I can act like I don't care but honestly, I kind of do. Like I despise Charlotte to an extent. But, she's still that kid that I grew up with, That kid that I love too death. The kid that regardless of what she does she'll always..Have that place. I Guess. Misty, Is another story. I haven't seen here in like..2 years, OR..well, Seriously seen her in 2 years. She doesn't make too big of an effort to see us, I dont understand how she can really care about us. She just seems like she's more out to get me, than out to be my aunt. So it's been easy to develop whatever these feelings are. I've been isolated from her, It's easy to..Not..hold her on a pedestal in my head. Plus all of the past things Charlotte has told me about her. So, hey. Thats where THAT started. I don't know about the Charlotte thing, I kind of regret it. I realize I didn't get her entire side of the story. But It still just ticked me off a little to realize..that..I could tell her something, and trust her with it, and specifically SAY, You know, Don't tell ANYONE..And then she just..goes and tells someone. I mean, SHE could've talked me into telling my Dad myself. But not..She didn't have to do it that way. Now, Misty hates me even more. Oh well, I'm an asshole still. I tried apologizing to Charlotte, Or at least telling her..My Half of the story, and..She didn't reply. I guess she doesn't care, Or maybe she's being the strong one. Who knows, But I give up. I honestly give up on everything.
No one around HERE needs me, Dad has his beer, and Anna, and Mom has Cheyann and Randy Hatch, And Shane has his band, and his groupies, and his life. And Sarah has Bridgette Richardson and everyone else. Charlotte..Has..whomever. Misty hates me. God only knows who else does. No one needs me, No one wants me. I'm just an asshole. And I give up. I honestly do. I'm sick. OF Trying. To be..Trying to IMPRESS SOMEONE. And constantly FAILING. I can't even ..I dont know. I give.
And that's it.
No one around HERE needs me, Dad has his beer, and Anna, and Mom has Cheyann and Randy Hatch, And Shane has his band, and his groupies, and his life. And Sarah has Bridgette Richardson and everyone else. Charlotte..Has..whomever. Misty hates me. God only knows who else does. No one needs me, No one wants me. I'm just an asshole. And I give up. I honestly do. I'm sick. OF Trying. To be..Trying to IMPRESS SOMEONE. And constantly FAILING. I can't even ..I dont know. I give.
And that's it.