Comments | wetfortono: → QUESTIONS MEME #3

wetfortono

→ QUESTIONS MEME #3

May 21, 2011 16:57

What to do while I'm on hiatus but likely bored for a day or two?

In honor of Ryuunosuke passing 21K a while ago, Nango 3K, Philip 2K, Hino 1K, J 1K, Ozu being brand new still and ... none of this besides Ryuunosuke is really noteworthy. Moving on!

ASK A QUESTION it can be anything CFUD related, OOC, IC, Relationship, psychology, thoughts, ( Read more... )

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wetfortono May 21 2011, 20:42:47 UTC

Frankly, it's a bit of his personal nightmare. Even as a person who will never stop worrying and can't let a case rest ever, Ryuunosuke has reached a point where he feels a bit sick to the stomach trying to imagine what could happen. After months of self-guilt-tripping, he has finally settled for not thinking about it if he can help it, because the worries have caused countless fights with Takeru about how he doesn't have faith in their relationship or how he doesn't believe that they will work out. Ryuunosuke is too stubborn to admit that he doesn't have the same freedom of decision as Takeru does in his position as a lord, and he doesn't want to imagine how many traditions he would be breaking out of pure selfishness.

It doesn't help that talking to either of his parents is complicated by his complexes. He knows that he owes Takeru his faith and conviction, but the idea of explaining his situation to his father alone petrifies him. At present, he has no idea how he is going to do it, and in secret he blesses camp for keeping him trapped, because here he is allowed to be carefree like a normal person. That way of thinking is too cowardly for him to admit, because he'd feel disgusted with himself, and in a way no matter what he does about the issue he won't be at peace with himself.

So. Even if he refuses to show it these days, he is anxious about what will happen. He doesn't know if he can do it. And it makes him feel guilty, which makes him feel like a bad boyfriend. IT'S A CYCLE OF NEGATIVE EMOTIONS. Can you still blame him for only worrying about the present anymore?

. . . After all that angst. Genta, how will You explain to Tanba? :)

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