Jackie Tyler's Grand Day Out 1/1
Story: Jackie Tyler's Grand Day Out
Author: wmr wendymr
Characters: Ninth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Jack Harkness, Jackie Tyler, Mickey Smith, Blon Fel Fotch Passameer-Day Slitheen
Rated: PG
Disclaimer: Still not mine, unfortunately
Summary: Mickey's not alone when he turns up in Cardiff in Boom Town.
Inspired by comments on my last Jackie drabble by DalekSteph and prchung - thank you! :) BRed very kindly by dark_aegis.
And dedicated to Aibhinn for giving us such a lovely day out in Vancouver yesterday: you were a fantastic tour-guide and great company.
Jackie Tyler’s Grand Day Out
“So what on earth are they doin’ in Cardiff?”
“Dunno. Rose said somethin’ about refuelling, but that can’t be right. Alien ship that goes all over time an’ space, an’ they have to fill up in Wales?”
“With that Doctor, who knows? Where are they, anyway?”
“She said they’d be in Roald Dahl Plass. Jus’ round the corner.”
“Oh, all right then.” They turn into the square, and there it is. Smack bang in the middle of the concourse. “Thought you meant Rose an’ the Doctor’d meet us here, not that they’d parked that TARDIS-thing here! What if they get a ticket, or it gets towed away?”
Mickey shrugs. “Got me. But just watch.”
She does. People walk past apparently without even noticing the big blue box that’s right under their noses. “What’s up with that then?”
“The Doctor’d tell us it’s cause us humans are thick.” Mickey grins.
“He’ll get a thick ear if he’s not careful. Hardly a difficult target, yeah?”
***
“You’re not an alien too, are you?”
“Nah, one hundred per cent human.”
The bloke who’s let them in is one of the best-looking men she’s seen in ages. And he’s travelling with the two of them? Rose has all the luck.
But she recognises the way the bloke’s looking her over. Oh, things are definitely looking up.
“Captain Jack Harkness,” he’s saying, taking her hand and raising it to his lips. “And you are...?”
She’s about to introduce herself, but suddenly Rose is at Charming Bloke’s shoulder. “Jack! That’s my mum!” she says indignantly.
Jack looks taken aback. Bloody Rose anyway. What, does she want to keep all three of them to herself? Before he can back away, she grabs Jack’s hand again. “I don’t mind if you don’t.”
A broad grin creases his face and he curls his free arm around her waist. But then there’s another voice in her ear, a Northern accent, sounding far too amused for her liking. “Careful, Jackie. You don’t know where he’s been.”
“What?” Irritated, she glares at the Doctor.
“Last bloke he slept with had tentacles.”
***
So the mayor’s an alien in disguise. Right. All the Doctor’s fault, of course. Got to be. This kind of stuff only happens when he’s around.
They’re discussing the best way to handle it, the Doctor and that Captain Jack. Inside the town hall, talking strategy, planning the best way to seal off exits. Everyone’s got a part in this plan, even Mickey. Idiots, all of them. Completely missing the obvious. Not one of them’s using their heads.
“And Jackie...” Jack’s running out of ideas. No exit left for her to cover.
“You never mind about me,” she tells him. “I’ve got better things to do than get ripped apart by a green alien... thing.” She turns and marches for the door.
“Mum!”
“Jackie!”
She ignores them. Let them play Mulder and Scully all they want. Someone’s got to have more sense. Now, there has to be a chip shop around here somewhere....
***
At last! They would have to be sodding difficult to find. In the bloody council executive room, no less. Trust the Doctor to make himself at home.
At first, all she can see is him and Rose. She’s pressed against him so tight you wouldn’t get a sheet of tissue-paper between them. He’s even got her feet off the floor.
He just better be using alien-strength condoms. She is not going to be pleased if she ends up with alien grandkids!
“They have the death penalty.”
Oh. Good, it is there, that Slitheen thing. Looks so bloody human, doesn’t it, all done up in that expensive suit and posh hairdo. What is it with aliens passing themselves off as humans? Lying gits, that’s what they are. If the Doctor was hairy with purple skin, two noses and scales, say, Rose would never have given him a second look.
They’re all staring at the Slitheen in silence now, even Mickey. What’s the matter with them? How many people - real people, humans - has this thing killed without a second thought? It’d kill more, too, except they’ve got it cornered. Or not - all it has to do is unzip its skin-suit and start killing them all.
When Mickey comes over and fills her in on what she missed, her blood boils. That... thing was going to blow up the whole planet just to make its getaway?
And there they are, the supposedly clever alien-fighters, just standing around like the Three Stooges, letting the Slitheen get them all squeamish at its descriptions of being boiled alive.
“Oh, you lot! Completely useless, you are!” Pushing past Mickey, dodging Jack, she walks straight up to the Slitheen. “Think you’re so bleedin’ clever, do you? Think you’ll get us all crying with your sob-story so we’ll let you go? Maybe that lot are stupid enough to listen, but not me.”
“And who are you, then?” the creature asks her.
“Never you mind.” She reaches into her shoulder-bag for the result of her visit to the local chippie. “See how you like this!”
The vinegar cascades over the Slitheen’s immaculately-coiffed hair, trickling down to where the zip is hidden on its forehead. She only just steps back in time. There’s a massive bang, and green goo flies everywhere.
Jack cries out in dismay. “No! Not all over the extrapolator!”
***
The Doctor and Jack bugger off - something about a nuclear power-plant needing to be shut down. She, Rose and Mickey wander off to the bay, where Mickey proves he’s a complete idiot by telling Rose he’s been seeing Tricia Delaney.
Predictably, Rose throws a wobbly. Like she’s got any right to talk! A blind man could see the way things are between her and the Doctor, and don’t think she hasn’t noticed the way Jack looks at Rose too. And at the Doctor. That Captain’ll go for anything. Good thing she didn’t take him seriously.
So here she is, on her own, leaning against a railing looking out over Cardiff Bay. Mickey’s stormed off and Rose has gone back to the TARDIS in a huff.
Oh, in a bit she’ll go back to the TARDIS as well, see Rose off before the lot of them vanish back into outer space again. But just for now it’s good to be on her own. Way too much drama and stuff around that lot. Too many aliens, too, and not just the sort who want to kill them.
And... oh, hold on. Ooh, he’s a bit of all right. Young - thirtyish - a little bit rat-featured and arrogant-looking, but a nice body. And the accent’s familiar, a lot closer to home than the Welsh voices all around. Or the American and Northern accents she’s been hearing too much of.
Smiling seductively, she steps out into the bloke’s path. “So, what’s a nice-looking London boy like you doing in a place like this?”
end
Author: wmr wendymr
Characters: Ninth Doctor, Rose Tyler, Jack Harkness, Jackie Tyler, Mickey Smith, Blon Fel Fotch Passameer-Day Slitheen
Rated: PG
Disclaimer: Still not mine, unfortunately
Summary: Mickey's not alone when he turns up in Cardiff in Boom Town.
Inspired by comments on my last Jackie drabble by DalekSteph and prchung - thank you! :) BRed very kindly by dark_aegis.
And dedicated to Aibhinn for giving us such a lovely day out in Vancouver yesterday: you were a fantastic tour-guide and great company.
Jackie Tyler’s Grand Day Out
“So what on earth are they doin’ in Cardiff?”
“Dunno. Rose said somethin’ about refuelling, but that can’t be right. Alien ship that goes all over time an’ space, an’ they have to fill up in Wales?”
“With that Doctor, who knows? Where are they, anyway?”
“She said they’d be in Roald Dahl Plass. Jus’ round the corner.”
“Oh, all right then.” They turn into the square, and there it is. Smack bang in the middle of the concourse. “Thought you meant Rose an’ the Doctor’d meet us here, not that they’d parked that TARDIS-thing here! What if they get a ticket, or it gets towed away?”
Mickey shrugs. “Got me. But just watch.”
She does. People walk past apparently without even noticing the big blue box that’s right under their noses. “What’s up with that then?”
“The Doctor’d tell us it’s cause us humans are thick.” Mickey grins.
“He’ll get a thick ear if he’s not careful. Hardly a difficult target, yeah?”
***
“You’re not an alien too, are you?”
“Nah, one hundred per cent human.”
The bloke who’s let them in is one of the best-looking men she’s seen in ages. And he’s travelling with the two of them? Rose has all the luck.
But she recognises the way the bloke’s looking her over. Oh, things are definitely looking up.
“Captain Jack Harkness,” he’s saying, taking her hand and raising it to his lips. “And you are...?”
She’s about to introduce herself, but suddenly Rose is at Charming Bloke’s shoulder. “Jack! That’s my mum!” she says indignantly.
Jack looks taken aback. Bloody Rose anyway. What, does she want to keep all three of them to herself? Before he can back away, she grabs Jack’s hand again. “I don’t mind if you don’t.”
A broad grin creases his face and he curls his free arm around her waist. But then there’s another voice in her ear, a Northern accent, sounding far too amused for her liking. “Careful, Jackie. You don’t know where he’s been.”
“What?” Irritated, she glares at the Doctor.
“Last bloke he slept with had tentacles.”
***
So the mayor’s an alien in disguise. Right. All the Doctor’s fault, of course. Got to be. This kind of stuff only happens when he’s around.
They’re discussing the best way to handle it, the Doctor and that Captain Jack. Inside the town hall, talking strategy, planning the best way to seal off exits. Everyone’s got a part in this plan, even Mickey. Idiots, all of them. Completely missing the obvious. Not one of them’s using their heads.
“And Jackie...” Jack’s running out of ideas. No exit left for her to cover.
“You never mind about me,” she tells him. “I’ve got better things to do than get ripped apart by a green alien... thing.” She turns and marches for the door.
“Mum!”
“Jackie!”
She ignores them. Let them play Mulder and Scully all they want. Someone’s got to have more sense. Now, there has to be a chip shop around here somewhere....
***
At last! They would have to be sodding difficult to find. In the bloody council executive room, no less. Trust the Doctor to make himself at home.
At first, all she can see is him and Rose. She’s pressed against him so tight you wouldn’t get a sheet of tissue-paper between them. He’s even got her feet off the floor.
He just better be using alien-strength condoms. She is not going to be pleased if she ends up with alien grandkids!
“They have the death penalty.”
Oh. Good, it is there, that Slitheen thing. Looks so bloody human, doesn’t it, all done up in that expensive suit and posh hairdo. What is it with aliens passing themselves off as humans? Lying gits, that’s what they are. If the Doctor was hairy with purple skin, two noses and scales, say, Rose would never have given him a second look.
They’re all staring at the Slitheen in silence now, even Mickey. What’s the matter with them? How many people - real people, humans - has this thing killed without a second thought? It’d kill more, too, except they’ve got it cornered. Or not - all it has to do is unzip its skin-suit and start killing them all.
When Mickey comes over and fills her in on what she missed, her blood boils. That... thing was going to blow up the whole planet just to make its getaway?
And there they are, the supposedly clever alien-fighters, just standing around like the Three Stooges, letting the Slitheen get them all squeamish at its descriptions of being boiled alive.
“Oh, you lot! Completely useless, you are!” Pushing past Mickey, dodging Jack, she walks straight up to the Slitheen. “Think you’re so bleedin’ clever, do you? Think you’ll get us all crying with your sob-story so we’ll let you go? Maybe that lot are stupid enough to listen, but not me.”
“And who are you, then?” the creature asks her.
“Never you mind.” She reaches into her shoulder-bag for the result of her visit to the local chippie. “See how you like this!”
The vinegar cascades over the Slitheen’s immaculately-coiffed hair, trickling down to where the zip is hidden on its forehead. She only just steps back in time. There’s a massive bang, and green goo flies everywhere.
Jack cries out in dismay. “No! Not all over the extrapolator!”
***
The Doctor and Jack bugger off - something about a nuclear power-plant needing to be shut down. She, Rose and Mickey wander off to the bay, where Mickey proves he’s a complete idiot by telling Rose he’s been seeing Tricia Delaney.
Predictably, Rose throws a wobbly. Like she’s got any right to talk! A blind man could see the way things are between her and the Doctor, and don’t think she hasn’t noticed the way Jack looks at Rose too. And at the Doctor. That Captain’ll go for anything. Good thing she didn’t take him seriously.
So here she is, on her own, leaning against a railing looking out over Cardiff Bay. Mickey’s stormed off and Rose has gone back to the TARDIS in a huff.
Oh, in a bit she’ll go back to the TARDIS as well, see Rose off before the lot of them vanish back into outer space again. But just for now it’s good to be on her own. Way too much drama and stuff around that lot. Too many aliens, too, and not just the sort who want to kill them.
And... oh, hold on. Ooh, he’s a bit of all right. Young - thirtyish - a little bit rat-featured and arrogant-looking, but a nice body. And the accent’s familiar, a lot closer to home than the Welsh voices all around. Or the American and Northern accents she’s been hearing too much of.
Smiling seductively, she steps out into the bloke’s path. “So, what’s a nice-looking London boy like you doing in a place like this?”
end