the weekend
so yesterday was a long day. freshman convo in the morning, soooooo long and boring, then VPA convo and general music convo for new students. then i came back to the room and did laundry and organized some stuff, went through some paperwork, played friday football, and had dinner while joe performed a harmonica concert for me. i've never been too close to joe, but he really is a good friend. so after walking to crouse only to find my card wouldn't let me in, i came back and decided to do some work outside. yadda yadda yadda, stuff happened and i came inside like 15 minutes later an absolute mess. so i locked myself in my room for a while and then decided i needed to get out. so when ben, rachel, and renae got back from the movie, we all went to ben's house and watched vito and stark moo at freshman in cow costumes. it definitely brightened my night.
today i got up early and went to crouse to practice, then i had brunch with the guys and did peer advising. then i came back and GOT MY INTERNET FIXED!! hooray :P. then renae and i went down to m-street and got books and i got some 7-up at CVS (...wonder what that's for...O:)). tonight the omegas are going out to dinner. it'll be a lot of fun to catch up and hang out a bit. then it's off to a shindig. it should be a good time.
so things are going alright. this semester has been really hard thus far with many many many emotional ups and downs, but lately more downs. this adjustment is going to take a lot of time, but i truly hope things work out for the best in the long run, whatever ends up happening. i really wish i could explain things better to him, but i just don't know how. i don't even know how to fully explain things to myself. it's hard and i'm not gonna lie, it hurts. it hurts so much sometimes. last night i realized another part that sucks about this, whenever i was hurt about anything, i could always go to him to talk about things. and now, well, i don't have that anymore. i know that sounds selfish, but to be honest, i do miss him. even though i still see him almost every day, i miss him more than i ever could have imagined. it's funny because the whole time in this relationship all i wanted was for him to be happy and now i'm working in the wrong direction.
with this entry i'm not looking for any sympathy, lord knows i don't deserve it. i just wanted to vent a bit. i thougth maybe writing things down would help me to sort things out, too bad it didn't really. i just want him to be happy again. he's absolutely wonderful and he doesn't deserve any of this. i'm sorry.
~andrea
today i got up early and went to crouse to practice, then i had brunch with the guys and did peer advising. then i came back and GOT MY INTERNET FIXED!! hooray :P. then renae and i went down to m-street and got books and i got some 7-up at CVS (...wonder what that's for...O:)). tonight the omegas are going out to dinner. it'll be a lot of fun to catch up and hang out a bit. then it's off to a shindig. it should be a good time.
so things are going alright. this semester has been really hard thus far with many many many emotional ups and downs, but lately more downs. this adjustment is going to take a lot of time, but i truly hope things work out for the best in the long run, whatever ends up happening. i really wish i could explain things better to him, but i just don't know how. i don't even know how to fully explain things to myself. it's hard and i'm not gonna lie, it hurts. it hurts so much sometimes. last night i realized another part that sucks about this, whenever i was hurt about anything, i could always go to him to talk about things. and now, well, i don't have that anymore. i know that sounds selfish, but to be honest, i do miss him. even though i still see him almost every day, i miss him more than i ever could have imagined. it's funny because the whole time in this relationship all i wanted was for him to be happy and now i'm working in the wrong direction.
with this entry i'm not looking for any sympathy, lord knows i don't deserve it. i just wanted to vent a bit. i thougth maybe writing things down would help me to sort things out, too bad it didn't really. i just want him to be happy again. he's absolutely wonderful and he doesn't deserve any of this. i'm sorry.
~andrea