Eliminating Umma 2/3
Title: Eliminating Umma 2/3
Author: wemwems
Genre: Comedy, A bit of angst, Drama
Rating: PG13
Pairing: OnKey, onesided!Ontae
Focus: PSYCHO-TAEMIN!! bahahaaha
Warning: Creepy evil maknae... I advise young people to stay away :P
Summary: Key has the absolute perfect boyfriend - caring, funny, handsome... just everything you could ask for. But the maknae's noticed that too, and what Minnie wants, Minnie gets >:)
A/N: I won! Thanks to everyone who voted for me ^_^
"Taemin, do you wanna come with me and Jjong to see a movie?"
"Ummm no thanks Minho." Taemin said, yawning as he did so. "I'm sleepy, I think I'm just gonna stay in the house."
"You sure about that? It's Wednesday night… you know what Wednesday night is for Onew and Key don't you?" Jonghyun warned him. "Is it just me or is it disturbing having a night specifically assigned for sex?"
"….. Taemin I think you should come out with us. Come on, we'll even watch the new power ranger movie that just came out." Minho insisted.
"No we will not!" Jonghyun glared at him evilly.
"It's okay you guys. Go. I don't want to come."
"Good." Jonghyun ran to the door. "Come on Minho!"
"Well… bye Minnie."
"See ya."
MInho trudged after Jonghyun.
"Minho what's up with you lately? Do you like Taemin or something?" Jonghyun asked when they were walking to the cinema
"What? Why?"
"You're kind of obvious. I mean 'Ohh Taemin play video games with me, oohhh Taemin come we'll watch power rangers, oohhhh Taemin lets make little babies with tiny eyes…'"
"Hyung! I never said that! Well… I never said the last part."
"You might as well have!"
"Well, it doesn't matter anyway if he does or doesn't."
"That's right, because he's totally in to Onew."
"Yeah… Wait what? You can see it too?"
"It's obvious! Gosh it's like I'm the only one who has eyes around here! Although I'm sure Key sees it too. That's why him and Taemin have been kind of on the edge with each other lately. Onew has no clue… obviously."
"Well, do you think we should do anything about it?"
"What can we do? I mean, unless you can try and get Taemin's attention away from Onew."
"Can you help me?"
"Fine. But you have to pay for the movies, and my popcorn. And wash my insoles every morning."
"Deal."
"Yay! We'll think of a plan when we get back."
"Taemin! Taemin are you okay?"
Key and Onew rushed in to the living room, where Taemin was lying on the sofa crying.
"What's wrong?" Onew asked him.
"And aren't you supposed to be at the movies with Jonghyun and Minho?" Key jutted in, receiving a nudge from Onew's elbow. ".. and why are you crying?"
"I… I… I CUT MY LIP!!"
"Oh for god's sake…"
"Shut up Key!" Onew told his boyfriend, much to his displeasure.
"What? Yeobo he's putting this on! He bit his lip, the little freak."
Taemin sat there sniffling.
"I'm.. I'm sorry you guys were b-busy. I'll b-be fine." He wiped his tears with his sweatshirt.
"No, no Minnie. Let me see your lip." Onew leaned in closer, holding Taemin's head straight.
"Why don't you just fucking kiss it better." Key scoffed.
"Kibum!"
"Fuck this…" Key stormed off to the bedroom.
"I'm sorry hyung…" Taemin snivelled. "I didn't mean to get him upset."
"It's not your fault Minnie…" Onew reassured him. "Key's just being a drama queen. He's been really difficult lately…"
"Aww. Is it something you want to talk about?"
"Oh. No no, there's no need."
"You sure?"
"Yeah. I mean, I should really be talking to him about this."
"But he's so high tempered! And bossy! Completely the opposite of you."
"Well, they say that opposites attract right?"
"But..."
"Oh and it looks like you did just bite your lip. Does it still hurt?"
"A bit."
"Put some ice on it, that will help. I really need to talk to Key about this..."
"But maybe he just needs some time to cool off."
"Yeah but I really don't want to put this off till later... Goodnight Minnie!"
"… night hyung."
Onew went in to his and Key's bedroom, locking the door behind him. Taemin ran in to his and Minho's room next door.
Dear diary,
Ow. My lip really hurts! I shouldn't have bitten it so hard, but I had to find a way to keep them from having… you know what tonight. I mean, not while I'm here. None of that. And it did more than just stop them from that! Key got upset and walked off! Haha I didn't even plan that! He just stormed off! He's way too short-tempered, seriously Onew deserves better. I happen to be very patient when I want to be ^_^ Ohh I hear them talking! Brb diary… I'll let you know how big the fight was in a second.
"Seriously can't you see what Taemin's doing to you? He is NOT a normal kid. That boy is crazy. MENTAL. MENTAL I TELL YOU!"
"Kibum, calm down! This is Taemin we're talking about. He's just the little maknae, he's harmless."
"Oh my goodness you are thick aren't you. He's manipulating you! Can't you see it?" Key's a complete wreck, his eyes red, his hair disheveled, arms flinging wildly in the air. "He's crazy, fucking psycho!"
"Look at yourself! Taemin's not the psycho one here as far as I'm concerned."
Key lets out a massive sigh, slumping down on to the bed. "Look, I'm sorry. I just… something's not right about him. It hasn't been for a while."
"I think… I think you've been stressed." Onew sits next to him. Key puts his head on Onew's lap, and Onew starts to stroke his hair. "I honestly don't think it's anything to do with Taemin. And even if it were, you have to trust me Bummie. You're the only guy I could ever love. Even at your worst times… kind of like now… I'm one hundred percent dedicated to you. You should know that."
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry yeobo. You're right. I should know that I have nothing to worry about."
"So you're going to drop this Taemin nonsense?"
"I can't promise anything… but I'll try."
"I love you Bummie."
"You're amazing…"
Ugh. That wasn't a fight. Oh well, I now know that Key is at his breaking point. *Yawn* I'm sleepy. I'm going to think of a scheme tonight to finally drive Key over the edge. Goodnight >:)
__________________________________________________________
"Morning Onew darling!"
"Morning my sweet little pumpkin pie. And how are we this morning?"
"Amazing, since I'm with you. Now what does my handsome stud want for breakfast."
"You." Onew takes Taemin in to his arms. "Kiss please."
"Nah ah ah, kissies come after breakfast."
"Awww please? Just one!"
"Oh fine!" Taemin gave Onew a light peck on the lips. "Is that enough?"
"There's never enough."
Suddenly Minho and Jonghyun bursted through the door, crying loudly.
"What's wrong?" Taemin asked them.
"It's… it's KEY!"
"He's… DEAD!"
Taemin and Onew looked at each other.
"Oh what a shame…" Onew said, with a pensive look on his face. "He was so young."
"I'm making pancakes, do you guys want some?" Taemin held his frying pan up.
"Yeah sure!"
"Yes please."
And the four remaining SHINee boys had a lovely peaceful breakfast that morning.
Dear diary,
Best dream… EVER! I really really really really wish reality was like this. It can be ^_^ I just have to get rid of Key. Kehehe I could so easily just push him out the window or something… this is a pretty tall building. Or I could stab him with one of his kitchen knives hehehehe. Or I could dress him up in a chicken costume and have Onew eat him! Bahaha… whatever way it is, I'm gonna do it soon. I can't can't can't wait to be with Onew! <3
_________________________________________________________________
"What have you got there Jjong?"
"I dunno, looks like Taemin's diary. Should we open it?"
"What? No! We're only looking through his stuff to see if anything would give us an idea for a plan to get him over Onew!"
"Yeah! And this is exactly that! I'm opening it."
Minho gave in and joined Jonghyun in reading the inner most private thoughts of their maknae. They silently read page by page, too engrossed and disturbed by what was inside to say anything. Finally, they reached the last entry, written only about an hour ago.
"Oh."
"My."
"God."
Jonghyun and Minho stood there, completely stunned.
"Is this some sort of joke?" Jonghyun chuckled nervously to himself. "Like seriously? He makes Onew stay late to rehearse with him, frames Key for forgetting to set the alarm clock, steals the lines in his song, cock blocks him and now he wants to … KILL him? This has got to be a joke. This is totally a joke. How could this not be a joke? This is a joke. This is a joke right? Minho?"
Minho stood there, shaking his head in disbelief.
"Jjong. This is no joke. Everything… it just… I mean it makes sense now. But also, it makes no sense at all. We've got to confront him!"
"No! Minho I've got a better idea. I have a plan. We have to tell Onew and Key though…."
"I really think I can handle this, if we just talk to Taemin…"
"Hello? Did you just read the same psycho diary that I did? He's far beyond a 'talking to'. We need to knock some sense in to that guy…"
"I don't know. I don't think we should tell them. Well, what's your plan?"
Author: wemwems
Genre: Comedy, A bit of angst, Drama
Rating: PG13
Pairing: OnKey, onesided!Ontae
Focus: PSYCHO-TAEMIN!! bahahaaha
Warning: Creepy evil maknae... I advise young people to stay away :P
Summary: Key has the absolute perfect boyfriend - caring, funny, handsome... just everything you could ask for. But the maknae's noticed that too, and what Minnie wants, Minnie gets >:)
A/N: I won! Thanks to everyone who voted for me ^_^
"Taemin, do you wanna come with me and Jjong to see a movie?"
"Ummm no thanks Minho." Taemin said, yawning as he did so. "I'm sleepy, I think I'm just gonna stay in the house."
"You sure about that? It's Wednesday night… you know what Wednesday night is for Onew and Key don't you?" Jonghyun warned him. "Is it just me or is it disturbing having a night specifically assigned for sex?"
"….. Taemin I think you should come out with us. Come on, we'll even watch the new power ranger movie that just came out." Minho insisted.
"No we will not!" Jonghyun glared at him evilly.
"It's okay you guys. Go. I don't want to come."
"Good." Jonghyun ran to the door. "Come on Minho!"
"Well… bye Minnie."
"See ya."
MInho trudged after Jonghyun.
"Minho what's up with you lately? Do you like Taemin or something?" Jonghyun asked when they were walking to the cinema
"What? Why?"
"You're kind of obvious. I mean 'Ohh Taemin play video games with me, oohhh Taemin come we'll watch power rangers, oohhhh Taemin lets make little babies with tiny eyes…'"
"Hyung! I never said that! Well… I never said the last part."
"You might as well have!"
"Well, it doesn't matter anyway if he does or doesn't."
"That's right, because he's totally in to Onew."
"Yeah… Wait what? You can see it too?"
"It's obvious! Gosh it's like I'm the only one who has eyes around here! Although I'm sure Key sees it too. That's why him and Taemin have been kind of on the edge with each other lately. Onew has no clue… obviously."
"Well, do you think we should do anything about it?"
"What can we do? I mean, unless you can try and get Taemin's attention away from Onew."
"Can you help me?"
"Fine. But you have to pay for the movies, and my popcorn. And wash my insoles every morning."
"Deal."
"Yay! We'll think of a plan when we get back."
"Taemin! Taemin are you okay?"
Key and Onew rushed in to the living room, where Taemin was lying on the sofa crying.
"What's wrong?" Onew asked him.
"And aren't you supposed to be at the movies with Jonghyun and Minho?" Key jutted in, receiving a nudge from Onew's elbow. ".. and why are you crying?"
"I… I… I CUT MY LIP!!"
"Oh for god's sake…"
"Shut up Key!" Onew told his boyfriend, much to his displeasure.
"What? Yeobo he's putting this on! He bit his lip, the little freak."
Taemin sat there sniffling.
"I'm.. I'm sorry you guys were b-busy. I'll b-be fine." He wiped his tears with his sweatshirt.
"No, no Minnie. Let me see your lip." Onew leaned in closer, holding Taemin's head straight.
"Why don't you just fucking kiss it better." Key scoffed.
"Kibum!"
"Fuck this…" Key stormed off to the bedroom.
"I'm sorry hyung…" Taemin snivelled. "I didn't mean to get him upset."
"It's not your fault Minnie…" Onew reassured him. "Key's just being a drama queen. He's been really difficult lately…"
"Aww. Is it something you want to talk about?"
"Oh. No no, there's no need."
"You sure?"
"Yeah. I mean, I should really be talking to him about this."
"But he's so high tempered! And bossy! Completely the opposite of you."
"Well, they say that opposites attract right?"
"But..."
"Oh and it looks like you did just bite your lip. Does it still hurt?"
"A bit."
"Put some ice on it, that will help. I really need to talk to Key about this..."
"But maybe he just needs some time to cool off."
"Yeah but I really don't want to put this off till later... Goodnight Minnie!"
"… night hyung."
Onew went in to his and Key's bedroom, locking the door behind him. Taemin ran in to his and Minho's room next door.
Dear diary,
Ow. My lip really hurts! I shouldn't have bitten it so hard, but I had to find a way to keep them from having… you know what tonight. I mean, not while I'm here. None of that. And it did more than just stop them from that! Key got upset and walked off! Haha I didn't even plan that! He just stormed off! He's way too short-tempered, seriously Onew deserves better. I happen to be very patient when I want to be ^_^ Ohh I hear them talking! Brb diary… I'll let you know how big the fight was in a second.
"Seriously can't you see what Taemin's doing to you? He is NOT a normal kid. That boy is crazy. MENTAL. MENTAL I TELL YOU!"
"Kibum, calm down! This is Taemin we're talking about. He's just the little maknae, he's harmless."
"Oh my goodness you are thick aren't you. He's manipulating you! Can't you see it?" Key's a complete wreck, his eyes red, his hair disheveled, arms flinging wildly in the air. "He's crazy, fucking psycho!"
"Look at yourself! Taemin's not the psycho one here as far as I'm concerned."
Key lets out a massive sigh, slumping down on to the bed. "Look, I'm sorry. I just… something's not right about him. It hasn't been for a while."
"I think… I think you've been stressed." Onew sits next to him. Key puts his head on Onew's lap, and Onew starts to stroke his hair. "I honestly don't think it's anything to do with Taemin. And even if it were, you have to trust me Bummie. You're the only guy I could ever love. Even at your worst times… kind of like now… I'm one hundred percent dedicated to you. You should know that."
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry yeobo. You're right. I should know that I have nothing to worry about."
"So you're going to drop this Taemin nonsense?"
"I can't promise anything… but I'll try."
"I love you Bummie."
"You're amazing…"
Ugh. That wasn't a fight. Oh well, I now know that Key is at his breaking point. *Yawn* I'm sleepy. I'm going to think of a scheme tonight to finally drive Key over the edge. Goodnight >:)
__________________________________________________________
"Morning Onew darling!"
"Morning my sweet little pumpkin pie. And how are we this morning?"
"Amazing, since I'm with you. Now what does my handsome stud want for breakfast."
"You." Onew takes Taemin in to his arms. "Kiss please."
"Nah ah ah, kissies come after breakfast."
"Awww please? Just one!"
"Oh fine!" Taemin gave Onew a light peck on the lips. "Is that enough?"
"There's never enough."
Suddenly Minho and Jonghyun bursted through the door, crying loudly.
"What's wrong?" Taemin asked them.
"It's… it's KEY!"
"He's… DEAD!"
Taemin and Onew looked at each other.
"Oh what a shame…" Onew said, with a pensive look on his face. "He was so young."
"I'm making pancakes, do you guys want some?" Taemin held his frying pan up.
"Yeah sure!"
"Yes please."
And the four remaining SHINee boys had a lovely peaceful breakfast that morning.
Dear diary,
Best dream… EVER! I really really really really wish reality was like this. It can be ^_^ I just have to get rid of Key. Kehehe I could so easily just push him out the window or something… this is a pretty tall building. Or I could stab him with one of his kitchen knives hehehehe. Or I could dress him up in a chicken costume and have Onew eat him! Bahaha… whatever way it is, I'm gonna do it soon. I can't can't can't wait to be with Onew! <3
_________________________________________________________________
"What have you got there Jjong?"
"I dunno, looks like Taemin's diary. Should we open it?"
"What? No! We're only looking through his stuff to see if anything would give us an idea for a plan to get him over Onew!"
"Yeah! And this is exactly that! I'm opening it."
Minho gave in and joined Jonghyun in reading the inner most private thoughts of their maknae. They silently read page by page, too engrossed and disturbed by what was inside to say anything. Finally, they reached the last entry, written only about an hour ago.
"Oh."
"My."
"God."
Jonghyun and Minho stood there, completely stunned.
"Is this some sort of joke?" Jonghyun chuckled nervously to himself. "Like seriously? He makes Onew stay late to rehearse with him, frames Key for forgetting to set the alarm clock, steals the lines in his song, cock blocks him and now he wants to … KILL him? This has got to be a joke. This is totally a joke. How could this not be a joke? This is a joke. This is a joke right? Minho?"
Minho stood there, shaking his head in disbelief.
"Jjong. This is no joke. Everything… it just… I mean it makes sense now. But also, it makes no sense at all. We've got to confront him!"
"No! Minho I've got a better idea. I have a plan. We have to tell Onew and Key though…."
"I really think I can handle this, if we just talk to Taemin…"
"Hello? Did you just read the same psycho diary that I did? He's far beyond a 'talking to'. We need to knock some sense in to that guy…"
"I don't know. I don't think we should tell them. Well, what's your plan?"