thinking things through..

[welbemilesapart]

mmm so lately ive had somet hings on my mind and i havent really found an adequit way of figuring them out...or of even venting what i think...i guess i can try this out and hope for the best. i hate the feeling of being used. and accusations that frequently come after simple requests. im not out to scam/get everyone walking the earth. i guess in a sense i wish things were back to the ways they were before. when outings were good..and there were no awkward spaces. it seems as tho the friendship is deteriorating..keeping me around for your convenience and you around for the company. the company i used to get..it no longer comes these days. i dont know what to do about it. its all so choppy...and not really making much sense, but i just wish there was a solution. togetherness is like pulling teeth, and at the present, it feels like all of my teeth are simultaneously being ripped out.

i want to change the way things are. im working on myself right now..next i need to work on things surrounding me..and their influences on my life.

and no, this is not about boys.

disregard if necessary..its not really for you, it's more for myself.