(no subject)
left books in car. said i was going to the library. didn't do homework. quit golf team. quit newspaper staff. got someone to cover shift. called in sick. quit without notice. told my parents i had to work. snuck out of the house. no-showed for my dentist appointment. skipped church. forgot to pray before going to bed. ignored friends. ignored new friends. made stupid lists. poured a drink. quit drinking. drank another one.
ran away from home -- said i'd never return. ran away from home again -- said i'd never be back. will probably never run away from home again.
bought asprin and bandages before i was hurt. golfed when i was hurt. ritualized ice therapy. stretched. got through. lost temper in traffic on the way to golf. lost temper while golfing. lost temper driving home from golfing. can't find temper.
only wore skateboard-company t-shirts. only wore band t-shirts. only wore blank t-shirts. only wore skate shoes. only wore thrift-store shoes. only walked in dress shoes. only ran in running shoes. only skated in skate shoes. got stuck breaking own rules.
wrote essays. made pages out of a few words. stared in disbelief at entire aisle filled with books at the library. wrote what it felt like to break someone's heart. wrote about mountains that had never been climbed. wrote things i could never be. wrote stories onto foggy windows. still can't finish a story. introduced myself to other writers. had other writers introduce themselves to me. spoke to writers who didn't speak my language. sat and watched from afar while strangers got stoked on something they read. witnessed a catharsis. wrote something cathartic. gave up on catharticism.
washed, rinsed, and repeated.
horded shoelaces. retaped old board. removed shields from bearings, oiled them, pressed them into hand-me-down wheels, and loved it. called the shop everyday to see if new zine was in. complained out loud that the zine sucked when it finally arrived. skated for an hour in my hallway. skated all night in the garage because it was raining. spent eight hours drawing and budgeting out a mini ramp. skated for two minutes at the perfect park. didn't skate once for six months. spent a week building a box and only tried to skate it once.
called the wrong name to an adult. called the wrong name to a kid. gave a cop a fake name. ran from cops. didn't run from cops. crumpled up ticket. talked my way out of ticket. talked my way into getting a court order. talked myself into believing it didn't matter. had trouble sleeping that night. borrowed money. spent money i didn't have. activated credit card, bought shit i didn't need, and went back to the place that i got in trouble at the first time.
gave a shit. give a shit. will give a shit.
maybe two.
ran away from home -- said i'd never return. ran away from home again -- said i'd never be back. will probably never run away from home again.
bought asprin and bandages before i was hurt. golfed when i was hurt. ritualized ice therapy. stretched. got through. lost temper in traffic on the way to golf. lost temper while golfing. lost temper driving home from golfing. can't find temper.
only wore skateboard-company t-shirts. only wore band t-shirts. only wore blank t-shirts. only wore skate shoes. only wore thrift-store shoes. only walked in dress shoes. only ran in running shoes. only skated in skate shoes. got stuck breaking own rules.
wrote essays. made pages out of a few words. stared in disbelief at entire aisle filled with books at the library. wrote what it felt like to break someone's heart. wrote about mountains that had never been climbed. wrote things i could never be. wrote stories onto foggy windows. still can't finish a story. introduced myself to other writers. had other writers introduce themselves to me. spoke to writers who didn't speak my language. sat and watched from afar while strangers got stoked on something they read. witnessed a catharsis. wrote something cathartic. gave up on catharticism.
washed, rinsed, and repeated.
horded shoelaces. retaped old board. removed shields from bearings, oiled them, pressed them into hand-me-down wheels, and loved it. called the shop everyday to see if new zine was in. complained out loud that the zine sucked when it finally arrived. skated for an hour in my hallway. skated all night in the garage because it was raining. spent eight hours drawing and budgeting out a mini ramp. skated for two minutes at the perfect park. didn't skate once for six months. spent a week building a box and only tried to skate it once.
called the wrong name to an adult. called the wrong name to a kid. gave a cop a fake name. ran from cops. didn't run from cops. crumpled up ticket. talked my way out of ticket. talked my way into getting a court order. talked myself into believing it didn't matter. had trouble sleeping that night. borrowed money. spent money i didn't have. activated credit card, bought shit i didn't need, and went back to the place that i got in trouble at the first time.
gave a shit. give a shit. will give a shit.
maybe two.