(no subject)
So graduation was yesterday.
It's such a surreal feeling. I don't know when it will truly hit me. I know there is still an entire summer of ruleage ahead, but technically, the completion of high school marks the completion of childhood. So weird.
When I was in 8th grade, I wanted nothing more than to go to Torrey Pines High School. My parents thought differently, and forced me to come to Parker. It was really devistating for me, to be torn apart from the only kids I had ever known, the Rancho Santa Fe kids. They were, with a few exceptions, all going to Torrey.
Freshmen and Sophomore year at Parker were pretty sucky for me, because I was sucky. I was too hurt and uncomfortable with my stiuation to enjoy anything. I don't really have any happy Parker memories from this time period. I think in those first two years, I hung out with Parker kids only once outside of school. Ever. I was such an emo little bitch! Or as Anya would say, a tirtel.
I'm saying this because I basically wasted the first two years of my high school career. For that reason, I really don't feel like it's time for me to graduate and go off to college. It seems like I still have at least a year left. Maybe two. Junior year was a big step up from the previous ones. I finally embraced Parker, made some new friends, and began to open up and feel at home. Senior year was so unbelievably amazing beyond words. I have never been so happy in my life. I love Parker, except for Tom Eversole. I love all my friends. I couldn't possibly feel more comfortable walking around the campus. It's amazing how everyone knows everyone. With Senior year, more than other years, people seemed to just be nicer to each other, and it was cool how most of us branched out to make all these new groups. I know I'm much better off here than at Torrey, but I'm so disappointed in myself that it took me so long to realize it. I really wish I could just go back in time, act with some maturity, stop complaining, and enjoy life from freshmen year on.
Grad Night was pretty awesome. Broomball was intense. Black team!! I scored a goal! Kendy scored like ten. Most of us were just signing yearbooks when we got back to Parker. I didn't even get to go on the mechanical bull, which sucks. They closed it right as I was going to. The hypnotist was hilarious. I was one of the people originally being hypnotized before they made a few people go back into the audience. I was a little skeptical at first, but hypnosis actually is legit. I felt like I was under his control but completely aware of what I was doing. It was really weird and hard to explain. Anyways, Elliot Wolfe being Gwen Stefani and Phil dancing with the hypnotist were pretty sweet.
The end of Grad Night, however, was one of the most terrible feelings I've ever felt. There wasn't any sort of closing to the night, so as the time approached 5:30 am, we all just sat there, anticipating everyone's departure. I said goodbye to a few people. The problem is that most of the people I would feel comfortable saying goodbye to are people I know well. People I will see again anyways. It's so sad to think that I'll probably never see half the people in our grade ever again.
I'm going to miss everyone so much. I haven't cried since middle school, but I could barely contain myself from breaking down by the end of Grad Night. I'm so thankful for all the amazing people I've met and all the amazing memories I've had at Parker. So many great times. It's an awesome feeling to know that Parker was the right choice for me, and that I grew not only intellectually, but really came into my own during these past few years.
It's such a surreal feeling. I don't know when it will truly hit me. I know there is still an entire summer of ruleage ahead, but technically, the completion of high school marks the completion of childhood. So weird.
When I was in 8th grade, I wanted nothing more than to go to Torrey Pines High School. My parents thought differently, and forced me to come to Parker. It was really devistating for me, to be torn apart from the only kids I had ever known, the Rancho Santa Fe kids. They were, with a few exceptions, all going to Torrey.
Freshmen and Sophomore year at Parker were pretty sucky for me, because I was sucky. I was too hurt and uncomfortable with my stiuation to enjoy anything. I don't really have any happy Parker memories from this time period. I think in those first two years, I hung out with Parker kids only once outside of school. Ever. I was such an emo little bitch! Or as Anya would say, a tirtel.
I'm saying this because I basically wasted the first two years of my high school career. For that reason, I really don't feel like it's time for me to graduate and go off to college. It seems like I still have at least a year left. Maybe two. Junior year was a big step up from the previous ones. I finally embraced Parker, made some new friends, and began to open up and feel at home. Senior year was so unbelievably amazing beyond words. I have never been so happy in my life. I love Parker, except for Tom Eversole. I love all my friends. I couldn't possibly feel more comfortable walking around the campus. It's amazing how everyone knows everyone. With Senior year, more than other years, people seemed to just be nicer to each other, and it was cool how most of us branched out to make all these new groups. I know I'm much better off here than at Torrey, but I'm so disappointed in myself that it took me so long to realize it. I really wish I could just go back in time, act with some maturity, stop complaining, and enjoy life from freshmen year on.
Grad Night was pretty awesome. Broomball was intense. Black team!! I scored a goal! Kendy scored like ten. Most of us were just signing yearbooks when we got back to Parker. I didn't even get to go on the mechanical bull, which sucks. They closed it right as I was going to. The hypnotist was hilarious. I was one of the people originally being hypnotized before they made a few people go back into the audience. I was a little skeptical at first, but hypnosis actually is legit. I felt like I was under his control but completely aware of what I was doing. It was really weird and hard to explain. Anyways, Elliot Wolfe being Gwen Stefani and Phil dancing with the hypnotist were pretty sweet.
The end of Grad Night, however, was one of the most terrible feelings I've ever felt. There wasn't any sort of closing to the night, so as the time approached 5:30 am, we all just sat there, anticipating everyone's departure. I said goodbye to a few people. The problem is that most of the people I would feel comfortable saying goodbye to are people I know well. People I will see again anyways. It's so sad to think that I'll probably never see half the people in our grade ever again.
I'm going to miss everyone so much. I haven't cried since middle school, but I could barely contain myself from breaking down by the end of Grad Night. I'm so thankful for all the amazing people I've met and all the amazing memories I've had at Parker. So many great times. It's an awesome feeling to know that Parker was the right choice for me, and that I grew not only intellectually, but really came into my own during these past few years.