plague, queen izzy, and death in childbirth
I should be working, got piles and piles of work to do, but laziness is my mantra. Civ IV is also too addicting. Random tales below.
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The first time I played Rhye's and Fall as England, I was such shit it wasn't even funny. Out of all the European nations, I had the lowest score, year in, year out.
There are no miracles in this story.
- In 1330AD, England caught the plague. The deaths of five longbowmen rocked the nation, as they were the islands' only defense.
- Sometime around 1400AD, Spain invaded England for reasons unexplained. I could only watch in horror as Queen Isabella, perched atop her throne, directed her navy to my islands. Her look of smug satisfaction was quite disconcerting.
- Despite Spain's rowdy declaration of war, very little warfare was actually occurring. Apparently Queen Izzy was just as lazy as she was arrogant.
- 1425AD: Spain - a nasty affair with too many boats to boot. Miracles do not exist, obviously, and their damn armada landed uneventfully at my northernmost tip.
- 1450AD: Inverness was lost to barbarians. For those not in the know, Inverness is a city in northern Scotland. Izzy was doing a good job of recreating the damn Spanish Empire, and containment on my part just wasn't working.
- At this point England was meeting other nations, and Spain, along with that poor fool Isabella, was knocked from its position as top scorer. Enter Persia. And China.
- 1500AD: Another plague, another year. At least that damn Spain was suffering from plague too.
- 1600AD: Defensive pacts are in working order now. Managed one with Germany, and another one with Russia. Is this not the Triple Entente or what? Certainly no one expected Germany and Russia to be working together, right?
- 1645AD: Declared war on Japan by accident, so China declared war on me. Which caused Germany and Russia to declare war on China, which caused Japan and Persia to declare war on Germany and Russia, which caused me to declare war on Japan and Persia. FML.
- The diplomacy menu became a dancing sequence of red lines. War, war, war, hungry for bloodshed, terror, and death.
- 1700AD: Another century gone, another world war fought. France is becoming increasingly angry. Yes, after shitfaced King Louis the Sun King was replaced by Napoleon, relations between the Perpetual Kingdom of Great Britain and the Temporary Republic of France have frayed. Completely.
- 1730AD: France is furious, and Napoleon declares war. FML.
- France goes after my colonies in North America. Is that a fucking rifleman I see? Surrender is imminent, and the footsteps of death are not far behind.
- 1775AD: America has spawned. Two of my cities flip over to them, and this is my last chance. Should I take it?
- 1776AD: I made an intelligent decision for once. "New" England it is!
- 1785AD: The Kingdom of Great Britain collapses, leaving behind ashes of its cities in every continent.
--
Yeah, that was pretty much what happened. America spawned, and three turns later, England died. What gives?
--
The first time I played Rhye's and Fall as England, I was such shit it wasn't even funny. Out of all the European nations, I had the lowest score, year in, year out.
There are no miracles in this story.
- In 1330AD, England caught the plague. The deaths of five longbowmen rocked the nation, as they were the islands' only defense.
- Sometime around 1400AD, Spain invaded England for reasons unexplained. I could only watch in horror as Queen Isabella, perched atop her throne, directed her navy to my islands. Her look of smug satisfaction was quite disconcerting.
- Despite Spain's rowdy declaration of war, very little warfare was actually occurring. Apparently Queen Izzy was just as lazy as she was arrogant.
- 1425AD: Spain - a nasty affair with too many boats to boot. Miracles do not exist, obviously, and their damn armada landed uneventfully at my northernmost tip.
- 1450AD: Inverness was lost to barbarians. For those not in the know, Inverness is a city in northern Scotland. Izzy was doing a good job of recreating the damn Spanish Empire, and containment on my part just wasn't working.
- At this point England was meeting other nations, and Spain, along with that poor fool Isabella, was knocked from its position as top scorer. Enter Persia. And China.
- 1500AD: Another plague, another year. At least that damn Spain was suffering from plague too.
- 1600AD: Defensive pacts are in working order now. Managed one with Germany, and another one with Russia. Is this not the Triple Entente or what? Certainly no one expected Germany and Russia to be working together, right?
- 1645AD: Declared war on Japan by accident, so China declared war on me. Which caused Germany and Russia to declare war on China, which caused Japan and Persia to declare war on Germany and Russia, which caused me to declare war on Japan and Persia. FML.
- The diplomacy menu became a dancing sequence of red lines. War, war, war, hungry for bloodshed, terror, and death.
- 1700AD: Another century gone, another world war fought. France is becoming increasingly angry. Yes, after shitfaced King Louis the Sun King was replaced by Napoleon, relations between the Perpetual Kingdom of Great Britain and the Temporary Republic of France have frayed. Completely.
- 1730AD: France is furious, and Napoleon declares war. FML.
- France goes after my colonies in North America. Is that a fucking rifleman I see? Surrender is imminent, and the footsteps of death are not far behind.
- 1775AD: America has spawned. Two of my cities flip over to them, and this is my last chance. Should I take it?
- 1776AD: I made an intelligent decision for once. "New" England it is!
- 1785AD: The Kingdom of Great Britain collapses, leaving behind ashes of its cities in every continent.
--
Yeah, that was pretty much what happened. America spawned, and three turns later, England died. What gives?