Broke
So i'm pretty much broke. As of last week there is $26 in my bank account. Once I deposit the $13 check from work that will be $39. There is also the $21.34 of change I've been saving in my starbucks mug to go into my savings account, that I'm giving in and putting in there too. Although it will come straight out so I can put gas in my car because its on empty again. This isn't a bitch fest its me putting down my reality in words so it can smack across the face some more and I can try to figure out what to do. Out of the 4 available days I can work they are working me 2. Wednesday and Saturday and they're not even long shifts. Its not like I wouldnt open up more days if I could, but I have class until 5:45 on tuesday and thursday, and friday is the one day that I actually have to myself or for friends. Though I suppose I could give that up too. I've given up pretty much everything else and I'm still broke. Having my tips has been helping it means I don't have to dip into whats left in my account but I'm getting closer and closer to needing to dip in. I get some grocery money on Friday from my parents, but I really need it for school supplies, gas, and winter clothes. I can live off of Ramen for awhile. Not having money isnt an issue because I want to be surrounded by tons of expensive things. Its an issue because if I don't have money, I don't have gas, so I can't get to class. Yes, theres the college station bus that comes around once every hour I think it is, but if I miss it then I'm stuck. And seeing as I live so fucking far away its not like I can walk or anything. Theres so much I'm missing out on too. I could have been in a workshop production of Romeo and Juliet, but oh no I have to work. And there are so many amazing internships and apprenticeships I have the opportunity to apply for but its point because I can't afford the programs, and I can't afford to spend all summer somewhere else without a job. I can't ask my parents for more money because they give me as much as they can and things are a little crazy right now. I mean hell they're paying for my tuition and my rent they shouldn't have to give me anything else. I'm just so frustrated and negative about everything and its just all BLAH!!! And I'm completely aware that things could be a hell of a lot worse. Its just really hard because my heads not in school this semester at all and I really have no will to go to class. None of my classes, not even my acting class and I have no idea of how to change that or make it any better. I'm just pissed at life I think, but i'm not sure why