an elevator epiphany
sooo, yeah. im definitely goin to see panic! at the disco. muwahahaha...thank you, elisa. by the way, i got my fat paycheck today, ill pay ya next time i see ya. why i wrote 'ya' instead of taking the time to write one extra letter to spell the word 'you'...i have no idea.
anyways.
last week i had a sort of epiphany that i forgot to write about. i was waiting at the elevator after work. our elevators are so slow...but my day had been even slower...
it was about 5:45, slightly cloudy, and the sun was already going down. it made me feel cold just looking out the window, because everything looked silver and gray, and the lighting was just at the point where you can see where you're going, but it hurts your eyes to look to closely at anything. anyways...i went to the closest elevator and pressed the button to go down. there was a girl who was talking on her cell phone about 5 feet away from me (she was waiting as well), but other than that the building was dim and empty and quiet. after i pressed the button, i took a step back and looked out past the balcony to my right to the wall made of windows that was the front of my office building. then i remembered that it looked cold, so i shivered a little bit inside and turned my head back to the glowing button with the slightly scratched up down arrow. for some reason that glowing button reminded me of a small flourescent light that i used to have by my bed when i was little. i used to turn that light on, unwrap my crayons, and stick them to the hot bulb to make a crazy, colorful, waxy masterpiece. that is, until my mum discovered my artwork and yelled some words at me about burning houses down. back to the epiphany, though...
so i was just staring at that button, not really thinking anything at first, but staring. and then i started to have that feeling that the girl with the phone was going to look over at me and see me staring at the button, not blinking. even though i (for some reason) didnt want her to catch me staring, i kept doing it. it was like i couldnt move my eyes away. and i thought about that, because she did end up looking at me...but i wondered what it was that makes people have those small, unimportant predictions that always come true. i also wondered what feeling that was that i had, when i wanted to look away but felt compelled to keep staring. and im also thinking that maybe i think too much, and maybe this won't make sense to anyone. but after that moment, i felt..i guess enlightened. like i had thought of something that would somehow make a difference. although i dont really see how it would... its just the feeling i had.
and you know what the funny thing is? when i walked outside, it was slightly warm. not cold at all.
anyways.
last week i had a sort of epiphany that i forgot to write about. i was waiting at the elevator after work. our elevators are so slow...but my day had been even slower...
it was about 5:45, slightly cloudy, and the sun was already going down. it made me feel cold just looking out the window, because everything looked silver and gray, and the lighting was just at the point where you can see where you're going, but it hurts your eyes to look to closely at anything. anyways...i went to the closest elevator and pressed the button to go down. there was a girl who was talking on her cell phone about 5 feet away from me (she was waiting as well), but other than that the building was dim and empty and quiet. after i pressed the button, i took a step back and looked out past the balcony to my right to the wall made of windows that was the front of my office building. then i remembered that it looked cold, so i shivered a little bit inside and turned my head back to the glowing button with the slightly scratched up down arrow. for some reason that glowing button reminded me of a small flourescent light that i used to have by my bed when i was little. i used to turn that light on, unwrap my crayons, and stick them to the hot bulb to make a crazy, colorful, waxy masterpiece. that is, until my mum discovered my artwork and yelled some words at me about burning houses down. back to the epiphany, though...
so i was just staring at that button, not really thinking anything at first, but staring. and then i started to have that feeling that the girl with the phone was going to look over at me and see me staring at the button, not blinking. even though i (for some reason) didnt want her to catch me staring, i kept doing it. it was like i couldnt move my eyes away. and i thought about that, because she did end up looking at me...but i wondered what it was that makes people have those small, unimportant predictions that always come true. i also wondered what feeling that was that i had, when i wanted to look away but felt compelled to keep staring. and im also thinking that maybe i think too much, and maybe this won't make sense to anyone. but after that moment, i felt..i guess enlightened. like i had thought of something that would somehow make a difference. although i dont really see how it would... its just the feeling i had.
and you know what the funny thing is? when i walked outside, it was slightly warm. not cold at all.