alone ...please come home to me
sadness does not describe the pain and emptyness i feel in my heart. this whole week has been nothing but a giant disaster to me. maybe if i end my life i can get all of her attention, but regardless im alone either way. I need her so bad. she says shes here for me, but where is she when im crying myself to sleep everynight, or when i hurt and need someone to talk too, or when i get hurt? its funny, you can do everything in the world for a person, put her before yourself, plan your whole world around her to make her happy, and still get stepped all over.I may be exxagerating, but thats how i feel. i had a baseball game today, i was so excited to play because i havent played in a while and im gonna play for my college. i was also excited because tina was comming to see me play. so the game starts and she is nowhere to be found. through the whole game im looking at every white car to see if it is her but nope, nothing. i ended up getting a bad injury, my face hit the floor straight-on and hyper-extended my arm and shoulder. it makes me so sad to write this because i get up and blood is litterally pouring out of my mouth and nose i got up and felt light headed and fell back on my face and all i could think about was tinas beautiful face and how much i missed her. my dad carried me to the car and took me to the hospital. tina finally gets there and cries and said shes sorry and that shes my gf again and that shes there for me. im crying so hard right now because shes been saying that so much to me lately and it doesnt feel like it. i dont understand how i can cry looking into her eyes tellingher how much i love her and need her and she can just leave me so easily when her "friend" texts her. i need you so much tina, my arm is in so much pain, why did u leave me? how can u find it so easy to leave when im in so much pain? i put you before everyone including myself. i would give my life for you if the tables were turned.i want to die