I'm going to be completely honest here, because it bothers me so much to see the way so many people are reacting to the way JKR handled Remus/Tonks in DH -
I was thrilled to see that scene in Grimmauld Place, where the thought of hurting Tonks and their child was so upsetting, so terrifying for him that he lost control in a way that we have NEVER seen him lose control before. I've long accepted that Remus isn't a public-display-of-affection character. He doesn't NEED to kiss her publicly, or run his fingers through her hair, or tell her that he loves her every two seconds (which is about as long as we seen Remus and Tonks together in DH, through Harry's eyes) in order to truly love her and be the best husband he can be. It would really be against his character, who's held everything inside for his entire life, to let that sort of emotion out.
No, how we know that he truly loves her more than life itself is that fight with Harry. He isn't spineless there; he's very much the opposite, really. He's not running away from a wife and a child he doesn't want; he's abandoning the only chance he has at happiness, the only person who has ever and will ever love him like that, unconditionally, without prejudice (as we see in the way that James, Sirius, and Lily loved him, and then decided he was the traitor because he was a werewolf), a woman who loved him so much that she has no thought of her own safety at the mere potential of Remus being in trouble--he left that in order to keep them safe. In order to make sure they remain alive and together, without him doing them any harm, either through his status as a werewolf or otherwise.
He looks moderately unhappy at Harry's birthday party, when they've obviously just found out that she's pregnant, since Tonks looks "radiant" (which is the point where I picked up on that, because why else would JKR have them married off quite literally less than two weeks after the end of HBP and Dumbledore's funeral?). But he's with her. He didn't run when he found out, but he was scared. I wound be, too, if I were them, bringing a child into that sort of world. He was prepared to die for the cause, and he must've known Tonks was, too. That had to be absolutely terrifying for him just to begin with, but then, at the wedding, when they found out the Ministry had been taken?
I can understand his fear completely. It wasn't because he didn't love Tonks, or he was just with her because he was lonely or thought she was his only chance. He wouldn't have been that terrified if he didn't love her. Instead, like I said before, the way he let his fear overpower him, the way he lost control like that to show Harry that bit of wolf inside of him--that is all the evidence JKR needed to show us to let us know that yes, Remus loved her more than he could possibly put into words in front of Harry, more than an affectionate touch on the cheek could ever convey.
He loved her just as strongly as she loved him, and to him, love was sacred, something to be cherished and kept close to his heart. He had so little of it throughout so much of his life that of course, when he finally had it, he had no idea what to do with it, just as it took him ages to figure out what to do with the friendship James, Sirius, and Peter gave him. It wasn't something to boast about, or something to show off. Tonks, who was surrounded by love throughout her entire life, was eager to share it; not that she appreciated Remus any less, but it was something she was accustomed to, being loved. And it made her happy, and she's the sort of character who wanted to make others happy, and it's easy to see why she was the one to share their good news with Harry.
I was thrilled to see that scene in Grimmauld Place, where the thought of hurting Tonks and their child was so upsetting, so terrifying for him that he lost control in a way that we have NEVER seen him lose control before. I've long accepted that Remus isn't a public-display-of-affection character. He doesn't NEED to kiss her publicly, or run his fingers through her hair, or tell her that he loves her every two seconds (which is about as long as we seen Remus and Tonks together in DH, through Harry's eyes) in order to truly love her and be the best husband he can be. It would really be against his character, who's held everything inside for his entire life, to let that sort of emotion out.
No, how we know that he truly loves her more than life itself is that fight with Harry. He isn't spineless there; he's very much the opposite, really. He's not running away from a wife and a child he doesn't want; he's abandoning the only chance he has at happiness, the only person who has ever and will ever love him like that, unconditionally, without prejudice (as we see in the way that James, Sirius, and Lily loved him, and then decided he was the traitor because he was a werewolf), a woman who loved him so much that she has no thought of her own safety at the mere potential of Remus being in trouble--he left that in order to keep them safe. In order to make sure they remain alive and together, without him doing them any harm, either through his status as a werewolf or otherwise.
He looks moderately unhappy at Harry's birthday party, when they've obviously just found out that she's pregnant, since Tonks looks "radiant" (which is the point where I picked up on that, because why else would JKR have them married off quite literally less than two weeks after the end of HBP and Dumbledore's funeral?). But he's with her. He didn't run when he found out, but he was scared. I wound be, too, if I were them, bringing a child into that sort of world. He was prepared to die for the cause, and he must've known Tonks was, too. That had to be absolutely terrifying for him just to begin with, but then, at the wedding, when they found out the Ministry had been taken?
I can understand his fear completely. It wasn't because he didn't love Tonks, or he was just with her because he was lonely or thought she was his only chance. He wouldn't have been that terrified if he didn't love her. Instead, like I said before, the way he let his fear overpower him, the way he lost control like that to show Harry that bit of wolf inside of him--that is all the evidence JKR needed to show us to let us know that yes, Remus loved her more than he could possibly put into words in front of Harry, more than an affectionate touch on the cheek could ever convey.
He loved her just as strongly as she loved him, and to him, love was sacred, something to be cherished and kept close to his heart. He had so little of it throughout so much of his life that of course, when he finally had it, he had no idea what to do with it, just as it took him ages to figure out what to do with the friendship James, Sirius, and Peter gave him. It wasn't something to boast about, or something to show off. Tonks, who was surrounded by love throughout her entire life, was eager to share it; not that she appreciated Remus any less, but it was something she was accustomed to, being loved. And it made her happy, and she's the sort of character who wanted to make others happy, and it's easy to see why she was the one to share their good news with Harry.
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