a whirlwind weekend
this weekend was crazy. i think i have experienced every emotion known to man.
NERVOUS - i was told to call back all the places i had applied on friday afternoon. i was nervous and my fingers even started to tingle. i called target, they said 'hell if i know' then i called panera and he's like 'you win!'
EXCITED - i got a job. hell fucking ya. i got a job. i can breath easy for a while, i can pay the bills next month. i dont suck. tomorrow i fill out paperwork and one day this week i have to go take a class. then i was going to kristins party and i knew that was going to be a great time.
DRUNK - kristin (who happens to be canadian) turned 21. fun fun fun times. 2 double cap'n and cokes. there was more than a little cap'n in me saturday night. gin and sprite (ive never tasted anything so gross). an irish car bomb (bailys and guiness added together and chugged before it curdles in about 2 mins). a shot of baquardi 151 and another double cap'n and coke. wowy wow wow wow. thats right. if anyone knows me i was druuuuuuuuunk. after kristin fell asleep we left and had to take nelson aka charlie nelson home. he lives in college station and we pull up and someone busts out with 'i want to go swimming'. alright. so we go skinny dipping in the college station pool. it was hot. then we head back to jess' house which is in u-house too. hang out and have some irish coffee. coffee and kahlua. mmmmmmmm. ive never tasted anything so good in my entire life. holy shit, they should sell that at starbucks. mmmmmmmmmmhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. we were all kinda tired so we went to bed. i had a hard time staying asleep.
HUNG OVER - i woke up feeling like crap. we headed over to jess' apt and just hung out, picked up some supplies from sarahs house and thought about doing something. we went to 5 & diner and tried to nurse the hang over. it was rough. i started to feel better and we got down to business.
CREATIVE - i worked on my group project and it turned out really well and it was good.
PROUD - the project turned out well and that made me very proud.
ACCEPTED - i hung out with all of my group and they really like me which makes me feel crazy good. they care what i think and i am actually an important part. we hung out, and got jess' lip/labreit pierced. we went and got some gelati and i saw melissa tur and robin hitt there. it was crazy.
SAD - my mom called and she was about crying the whole time. my mom has a restraining order out against kenny. they are getting divorced. marriage # 3 bites the dust. i want to dislike her, i want to, but i cant. i feel her pain. i cant empathize, but i simpathize. i cant be heartless. i told her about checking out grad schools. she almost cried. she knows that i am not going to turn out like that, and i did it by myself. its so sad, i want things to be better for her, but i cant do that, nobody can. she owes $90,000 on our house in umatilla. that has to be at least 3 times what its worth. she'll never pay that off. my mom got all but a few teeth pulled on her bottom jaw, and she's happy about it. toothless, 3 divorces, skinny shadow of a woman before she's done with her 45th year of living. my grandma has been married and divorced 3x, my mom has been married and divorced 3x, my sister has one divorce under her belt and is not dating her baby daddy anymore after dragging him down here from ny, thats just wrong. i hope that my sister picks up the family curse so i dont. its scary, its upsetting, and its sad. i am flooded by emotions. i just cant deal with it. its just too fucked up. i emailed my dad and he told me he thinks i should move home to go to grad school. ive already checked them out, they dont have my program. he also suggested a purely online degree. i dont think i could do that. is that really what im destined for in other peoples eyes. it cant end anywhere good.
DISAPPOINTED - i told the worlds hottest man that i dont think we should see each other because we dont speak the same language. i dont want to lead him on or use him, but is disappointing none the less. ari was going to show up to the party, but didnt. dont know what went on there. there's nobody that can say anything, knocking him down or anything, but i care about him. not sure why, but i do. i hope he doesnt flake again. the party wasnt a big deal and last min that he didnt know if he was going to go to or not. its just thought that he would step up. hmmm. the heart is just too strong for my own good sometimes.
LONELY - mel is out of town this weekend for 6 count em (thur, fri, sat, sun, mon, tue) 6 days.
SHOCK - my body is going through shock and shutting down from the kingdom hearts 2 next door. its pulling my life energy away from me and killing me. no good.
NERVOUS - i was told to call back all the places i had applied on friday afternoon. i was nervous and my fingers even started to tingle. i called target, they said 'hell if i know' then i called panera and he's like 'you win!'
EXCITED - i got a job. hell fucking ya. i got a job. i can breath easy for a while, i can pay the bills next month. i dont suck. tomorrow i fill out paperwork and one day this week i have to go take a class. then i was going to kristins party and i knew that was going to be a great time.
DRUNK - kristin (who happens to be canadian) turned 21. fun fun fun times. 2 double cap'n and cokes. there was more than a little cap'n in me saturday night. gin and sprite (ive never tasted anything so gross). an irish car bomb (bailys and guiness added together and chugged before it curdles in about 2 mins). a shot of baquardi 151 and another double cap'n and coke. wowy wow wow wow. thats right. if anyone knows me i was druuuuuuuuunk. after kristin fell asleep we left and had to take nelson aka charlie nelson home. he lives in college station and we pull up and someone busts out with 'i want to go swimming'. alright. so we go skinny dipping in the college station pool. it was hot. then we head back to jess' house which is in u-house too. hang out and have some irish coffee. coffee and kahlua. mmmmmmmm. ive never tasted anything so good in my entire life. holy shit, they should sell that at starbucks. mmmmmmmmmmhmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. we were all kinda tired so we went to bed. i had a hard time staying asleep.
HUNG OVER - i woke up feeling like crap. we headed over to jess' apt and just hung out, picked up some supplies from sarahs house and thought about doing something. we went to 5 & diner and tried to nurse the hang over. it was rough. i started to feel better and we got down to business.
CREATIVE - i worked on my group project and it turned out really well and it was good.
PROUD - the project turned out well and that made me very proud.
ACCEPTED - i hung out with all of my group and they really like me which makes me feel crazy good. they care what i think and i am actually an important part. we hung out, and got jess' lip/labreit pierced. we went and got some gelati and i saw melissa tur and robin hitt there. it was crazy.
SAD - my mom called and she was about crying the whole time. my mom has a restraining order out against kenny. they are getting divorced. marriage # 3 bites the dust. i want to dislike her, i want to, but i cant. i feel her pain. i cant empathize, but i simpathize. i cant be heartless. i told her about checking out grad schools. she almost cried. she knows that i am not going to turn out like that, and i did it by myself. its so sad, i want things to be better for her, but i cant do that, nobody can. she owes $90,000 on our house in umatilla. that has to be at least 3 times what its worth. she'll never pay that off. my mom got all but a few teeth pulled on her bottom jaw, and she's happy about it. toothless, 3 divorces, skinny shadow of a woman before she's done with her 45th year of living. my grandma has been married and divorced 3x, my mom has been married and divorced 3x, my sister has one divorce under her belt and is not dating her baby daddy anymore after dragging him down here from ny, thats just wrong. i hope that my sister picks up the family curse so i dont. its scary, its upsetting, and its sad. i am flooded by emotions. i just cant deal with it. its just too fucked up. i emailed my dad and he told me he thinks i should move home to go to grad school. ive already checked them out, they dont have my program. he also suggested a purely online degree. i dont think i could do that. is that really what im destined for in other peoples eyes. it cant end anywhere good.
DISAPPOINTED - i told the worlds hottest man that i dont think we should see each other because we dont speak the same language. i dont want to lead him on or use him, but is disappointing none the less. ari was going to show up to the party, but didnt. dont know what went on there. there's nobody that can say anything, knocking him down or anything, but i care about him. not sure why, but i do. i hope he doesnt flake again. the party wasnt a big deal and last min that he didnt know if he was going to go to or not. its just thought that he would step up. hmmm. the heart is just too strong for my own good sometimes.
LONELY - mel is out of town this weekend for 6 count em (thur, fri, sat, sun, mon, tue) 6 days.
SHOCK - my body is going through shock and shutting down from the kingdom hearts 2 next door. its pulling my life energy away from me and killing me. no good.