Twenty Five and Alive?

[wearfancybriefs]

It's a feat to find a private world
living with your boyfriend
owning a cellphone
singing in a band that is doing moderately well.

I found one running today.
-though I had to cross the street a few times so as I would not have to smile or speak or think of strangers, walking their children or dogs...-

//////////
The only words that speak are action.
I will stop telling you what I want to do;
I will do it.

All the energy is quantifiable; my mistakes are quantifiable.
I had always thought my faults could be attributed to
my inability to hold myself "accountable" or "responsible"
but lately it seems not so much an issue of accounting or life insurance-
Life is seeming very specific.
Learning to be who I am is very specific.
I am an old man finely pruning a bonsai tree, his favorite, his only.
I am an old woman carefully spicing a flank, her mother's recipe, her family.
I was an old child wistfully watching children swing...

I've been blaming my fleshy feet for growing too large
for any rain boot I wore when I was five
for blaming my eyes that they lost their innocence
no, I'm not as young anymore.
///////////

I hear my knees make sounds of
morning breakfast cereal
as I add the milk.
They shouldn't make those sounds.

//////
I resolve to solve.
To act. I'm running, aren't I? I'm mostly walking.
I'll buy new shoes. These shoes hurt. Once I get those shoes I will be able to run just fine. It won't hurt. To run.
/////

Does everyone go through a trough at 25?