(no subject)

[weare]

Cycling again tonight. Not even sure who I am right now. And as I lay here, contimplating that, I find myself full of fear all of the sudden. I just keep on seeing what T said. About the cuts being a sign of instability and how if we push too hard I can become instable. I'm laying here, staring off into space. Both my children asleep here on my bed. Hearing things in my house. Trying to watch the season premeire of Atlantis. And I'm very very afraid. Of what? I don't know. Not so much about the thought of becomming unstable. I had pretty much talked myself out of fearing that. I mean, my children do a good job of grounding me. They are my center. So long as I have them I'm good to go. [yeah, this is Jessie again]

Perhaps I'm more afraid of how far things will go. Or perhaps I'm not the one whose afraid but I'm reading another fear. Or something. *sigh*

Nevermind. I'm just having a bad night.