second part of the story
Title:Need
Author:Mia
Rating:PG
Sumary/Disclamer: Bam's side to the story. Complementary to one of my earler posts 'Desperation'. I hope all of you like this. I do have more parts planed. Something to tie it all togeather. Explanations and what not. This part is dedicated to all the lovely peeps that gave me love on the last part. Lastly theise boys no mater how lovely they might be do not belong to me. I only gain pleasure in the joys of writing..so on now.
Need
God do I wish I wasn’t going into this all alone. Mostly I wish that he was here with me. I kneed him.
Today of all days is my wedding day, would you believe it. Me, Bam Margera is getting married. Not that I dident want this or anything its just Missy isn’t realy who I want to be with. I love her in all but she’s just not the right one. It’s been him for ever. Ever since we met I felt this connection that ran deeper than what any outside observer could see. That first time we met I was so nervous. I had been practically worshiping everything about Ville Valo since I saw his face and heard the music. I dident want to make him uncomfortable. So most of the time I just babbled like a teenage girl. Every other thing I said was repeating how much I liked their music and image. What I didn’t say was how much I already wanted Ville. When I first saw them in the magazine I didn’t think much of his looks but once I saw him face to face I was thrown through a loop and then shaking his hand made a shiver run through my body from head to toe. But like I said here I am the biggest idiot on earth because I was too scared to say anything to Ville. I kind of figured out over time that he was at least attracted to me and he was always very touch-feely with me. It’s not like I ever minded though, I liked being held by Ville more than anything.
For three years I knew that Ville wanted me and I knew that I wanted him but unfortunately both of us were in serious relationships at the time. Then Jenn left me and I was finally free to give into my fantasies concerning Ville. Then Missy and I got back in contact. I figured that since Ville had recently become engaged to Jonna then why the hell not get with Missy. She’s a perfectly good woman and she cares for me too. Besides I figured that Ville had gotten over his thing for me, so why should I sit and pine for him. Eventually I asked Missy to marry me and no sooner than I did I found out that Ville and Jonna broke up. A fucking month too late.
About then I decided to fly to Helsinki to visit and cheer my best friend up. I became so worried about Ville while I was there. I knew that I loved him now and it hurt me to see him hurt himself. He was almost never sober for the 2 weeks and on the night I told him that Missy and I were engaged he pulled out a bag with some coke in it and begin to snort some right in front of me. I freaked out. Sure I had done it before too but it was always in a party situation. I never just sat at home and got high. I locked myself in the spar bedroom for the rest of the night and fumed and cried a little. The next day I got the chance to ask the guys about it and found out that they were worried too. Linde said that this has been happening more and more often that last few months because Ville was depressed about something he wouldn’t talk about. When I confronted Ville about this later that night he got beyond pissed at me. I had never seen him act like that. Yelling and throwing things. He yelled at me to leave him alone so I did. As much as it hurt me I did.
So here I am standing by the alter and Missy is walking towards me up the isle. She does look beautiful, but its not her who I realy want to be here with. But oh well right. I do lover her so we will be happy at least. And its not like Ville is just going to show up and….
At least that’s what I thought until the doors banged open and Ville was only 50 yards away.
~!~!~!~!~!~!~
Oh an evil clif hanger. Like i said i do have more planed. Just wait for it. Next tuesday is the most likely date. The only time i ever have ideas are on the weekend. Unload all the weeks stres ya know.
Much Love Darlings
Mia
Author:Mia
Rating:PG
Sumary/Disclamer: Bam's side to the story. Complementary to one of my earler posts 'Desperation'. I hope all of you like this. I do have more parts planed. Something to tie it all togeather. Explanations and what not. This part is dedicated to all the lovely peeps that gave me love on the last part. Lastly theise boys no mater how lovely they might be do not belong to me. I only gain pleasure in the joys of writing..so on now.
Need
God do I wish I wasn’t going into this all alone. Mostly I wish that he was here with me. I kneed him.
Today of all days is my wedding day, would you believe it. Me, Bam Margera is getting married. Not that I dident want this or anything its just Missy isn’t realy who I want to be with. I love her in all but she’s just not the right one. It’s been him for ever. Ever since we met I felt this connection that ran deeper than what any outside observer could see. That first time we met I was so nervous. I had been practically worshiping everything about Ville Valo since I saw his face and heard the music. I dident want to make him uncomfortable. So most of the time I just babbled like a teenage girl. Every other thing I said was repeating how much I liked their music and image. What I didn’t say was how much I already wanted Ville. When I first saw them in the magazine I didn’t think much of his looks but once I saw him face to face I was thrown through a loop and then shaking his hand made a shiver run through my body from head to toe. But like I said here I am the biggest idiot on earth because I was too scared to say anything to Ville. I kind of figured out over time that he was at least attracted to me and he was always very touch-feely with me. It’s not like I ever minded though, I liked being held by Ville more than anything.
For three years I knew that Ville wanted me and I knew that I wanted him but unfortunately both of us were in serious relationships at the time. Then Jenn left me and I was finally free to give into my fantasies concerning Ville. Then Missy and I got back in contact. I figured that since Ville had recently become engaged to Jonna then why the hell not get with Missy. She’s a perfectly good woman and she cares for me too. Besides I figured that Ville had gotten over his thing for me, so why should I sit and pine for him. Eventually I asked Missy to marry me and no sooner than I did I found out that Ville and Jonna broke up. A fucking month too late.
About then I decided to fly to Helsinki to visit and cheer my best friend up. I became so worried about Ville while I was there. I knew that I loved him now and it hurt me to see him hurt himself. He was almost never sober for the 2 weeks and on the night I told him that Missy and I were engaged he pulled out a bag with some coke in it and begin to snort some right in front of me. I freaked out. Sure I had done it before too but it was always in a party situation. I never just sat at home and got high. I locked myself in the spar bedroom for the rest of the night and fumed and cried a little. The next day I got the chance to ask the guys about it and found out that they were worried too. Linde said that this has been happening more and more often that last few months because Ville was depressed about something he wouldn’t talk about. When I confronted Ville about this later that night he got beyond pissed at me. I had never seen him act like that. Yelling and throwing things. He yelled at me to leave him alone so I did. As much as it hurt me I did.
So here I am standing by the alter and Missy is walking towards me up the isle. She does look beautiful, but its not her who I realy want to be here with. But oh well right. I do lover her so we will be happy at least. And its not like Ville is just going to show up and….
At least that’s what I thought until the doors banged open and Ville was only 50 yards away.
~!~!~!~!~!~!~
Oh an evil clif hanger. Like i said i do have more planed. Just wait for it. Next tuesday is the most likely date. The only time i ever have ideas are on the weekend. Unload all the weeks stres ya know.
Much Love Darlings
Mia