Fic: The Ways of the World, (2/?), Tom/OFC

Dec 12, 2010 19:32




Title: The Ways of the World (2/?)
Pairings/Genre: Tom/OFC, Bill/OMC, Georg/OFC, lots of gen on the side
Rating: NC17
Summary: Much has changed for the better in Tom's life since he fell in love, but the world keeps spinning and the show must go on. Sequel to The Best Laid Plans.


Tom woke to a shrill noise ringing in his ears. The soft mattress under him heaved, and then there were two hands on his shoulders, shaking him.

“Tom,” his girlfriend squeaked. “We slept through the alarm.”

He forced his eyes open to look up at her. She was pale and bleary-faced, much like Tom felt. He patted the bed, searching for his cell phone, which he was sure he had placed next to his pillow so it’d wake him up early. Finally, he found it wedged between the mattress and the headboard, where the alarm had gone off, unheard. He squinted at the display. Ten past nine. Fuck.

If they’d only had to meet their band mates, it would’ve been okay to run a little late - Georg had made them wait more often than Tom could count - but they had interviews with potential employees scheduled, and being late was just fucking unprofessional. Groaning, he fought off the duvet, which had wrapped itself around him in the night somehow and trapped his legs.

Erika kneeled in the middle of the bed, rubbing her eyes. She was still naked, but Tom didn’t have time to spare her more than one appreciative glance while he pulled on his clothes.

“Ugh. Headache,” she muttered. “I really shouldn’t drink.”

“You shouldn’t,” he agreed. He ran a hand through his dreads, then tied them back. He had no time to sort them out now, or to shave, but he definitely needed a quick shower to wake him up. He grabbed his phone and hit speed dial. To his relief, Bill was quick to pick up. “Hey, are you on your way yet?” Tom asked.

“I never left.” Bill’s voice sounded soft and faraway.

“You’re still here? At Erika’s?” Tom frowned. “Why didn’t you wake me, idiot?”

“Relax,” Bill said, which was unlike him because Bill was usually the consummate professional, and he hated running late just as much as Tom did. “The studio’s not as far from here as from our house, we won’t need more than half an hour to get there.”

Tom huffed. “I’ll be out in a minute.” He hung up. “Bill spent the night here,” he told his girlfriend.

“Yeah, I figured,” she yawned. She’d put on some underwear and wrapped herself in her fluffy pink bathrobe, looking cozy and warm. Tom wished he had time to take her back to bed for a proper wake-up. “When I went to the bathroom at four, they were still talking.”

“They?”

“Robert?” she reminded him. She cracked a tiny smile, looking smug like a kitten. “It’s cute, isn’t it? Come on, go shower, I’ll make some coffee.”

Cute, Tom thought grumpily as he stood under the hot spray of the shower, eyes closed and brow furrowed. Infatuation wasn’t cute if it made Bill miss out on hours of much-needed sleep and forget to wake Tom up so Tom could have his morning routine. He needed his morning routine - long shower, hot coffee, a cigarette smoked in peace, and then the careful selection of the different, matching pieces of his outfit. If he got off on the wrong foot in the morning, Tom could be moody for hours, and he didn’t want to be moody, not when he was back home with his girlfriend at last and everything should be perfect.

Hugging himself, he let the hot water wash over him, soothe the ache in his bones. He felt like a truck had run him over. Lack of sleep coupled with a lack of space hadn’t made for a good night. Tom didn’t need much in the way of personal space, he was used to sharing his bubble with Bill or his bandmates and, these days, with Erika, but when he was exhausted like this, her single bed just wasn’t comfortable. He rolled his shoulders, feeling bone and muscle crunch.

All too soon, he had to leave the warmth of the shower. Shivering in the draughty bathroom, he towelled off. His bag sat by the door, having been delivered there while he showered, by magic or, more likely, the lovely lady of the house. Tom smiled a little in spite of himself as he pulled on a fresh set of sweatpants and t-shirts and stuffed his worn clothes into the bag. She always took care of him when his life got stressful. When the meeting was over, he’d finally have time to focus on her for a while, as she deserved.

He shuffled out of the bathroom to find Bill standing at the opposite end of the long, narrow hall, leaning against the wall with a mug of coffee in his hand. He was looking at something in the living room, an expression of quiet awe on his face. His mouth was moving, soundlessly forming words.

“Hey.” Tom walked up to him and peered around the doorframe into the living room. Robert was sprawled out on the couch, asleep. He was still wearing his strange, formal outfit, but he looked less stiff in sleep. His clothes were slightly rumpled, and his unruly brown hair was falling in his face.

Tom raised an eyebrow at his brother. “Is this how you spent the night? Standing here?”

“Shh! Don’t wake him up,” Bill whispered. Carefully, he pulled the door shut. “We talked for a while, until he fell asleep. I don’t think he usually keeps late hours.” He sighed softly, tired, but pleased. “It was nice.”

“Did you sleep at all?” Judging by the bright, feverish glow of Bill’s eyes, he was running on caffeine and excitement only.

“Not much,” Bill admitted. He grasped Tom’s elbow and led him into the kitchen, where Erika was bustling around, fully immersed in the preparation of a big breakfast. Bill poured himself more coffee. “I wrote something,” he said in between quick little sips. He pulled his lyrics notebook out of his back pocket and handed it to Tom, but try as he might, for once, Tom couldn’t decipher any of the abbreviations in shaky handwriting. “It’s not done yet, obviously!” Bill said. “But it’s going to be good! I can feel it!”

“Uh-hu,” Tom made sceptically. There had never been a note from Bill he didn’t understand, a cryptic line he couldn’t make sense of.

Bill blew at his coffee to cool it. “You didn’t sleep well?” It wasn’t really a question.

“Here, eat something, it’ll make you feel better.” Erika put a bowl of yoghurt and fresh fruit in Tom’s hand.

“I’m feeling fine,” Tom snapped. “I’m just not happy we’re running late for our meeting and Bill’s so tired he can’t even see straight.”

“I’m not too tired for work,” Bill protested. “And I had fun for the first time in months last night, so it was well worth it!”

“For the first time in months?” Tom snorted. “So you didn’t have fun on tour with me at all, huh?”

Bill rolled his eyes. “I always have fun with you, don’t be silly! You know I don’t get to meet a lot of people I actually like.”

“You like him?” Erika still looked tired, but glee was quickly waking her up. She wrung her hands, trying and failing to contain her excitement. “He’s lovely, isn’t he? He’s my best friend at uni.”

Bill smiled at her. “He’s almost too good to be true.” He noticed Tom frowning at him again and quickly gulped down more coffee, hiding his expression behind Erika’s pink mug.

“Isn’t he?” Erika’s eyes sparkled. “And he looks like he stepped right out of a Victorian painting. I should sketch him while he’s asleep--”

“Could both of you stop?” Tom moaned. “It’s too early in the morning to be so crazy.”

“Who’s being crazy?” Bill looked wounded.

“Not me.” Tom chewed a piece of apple with self-righteous indignation. It was too early, he hadn’t slept all that well, and his twin as well as his girlfriend were cooing over a guy who wasn’t Tom. It didn’t sit well with him.

“Don’t be silly.” Erika rose on tiptoes to kiss the corner of his mouth. “I still love you best,” she whispered, even though he hadn’t even doubted it. “Anyone ever tell you you worry too much?”

“I tell him that all the time,” Bill said. “He’s so neurotic.”

“Am not,” Tom said through a mouthful of yoghurt.

Bill started to sing the melody of ‘Automatic’, substituting the word with ‘so neurotic’. It fit surprisingly well.

Tom made a face. He didn’t know why they had to team up on him this early in the morning. It wasn’t fair. “Can we go? At this rate, even Georg will be there before us.”

Bill drained his mug. “We can go.”

“No breakfast?” Erika looked disappointed. “Give me two minutes--”

“We don’t have two minutes, I’m sorry,” Tom said curtly. He pulled her close and kissed her, putting the empty bowl in her hands. “I’ll be back as soon as I can, okay?”

“Okay,” she sighed. “I’ll be here.”

“When Robert wakes up, tell him…” Bill trailed off uncertainly. “Say hello from me, and tell him I really enjoyed talking to him, okay?”

That made her smile again. She put the bowl aside and hugged Bill around the waist. “Can I give him your number if he asks?”

“No!” Tom said, at the same time that Bill nodded, “Yes!” The twins looked at each other, surprised to be at odds for once.

“Since when do we give people our phone numbers?” Tom asked.

“Since this person is not a stalker or a crazy fan?” Bill shook his head at his brother. “Don’t be so paranoid, Tom. Come on. Erika, I’ll see you soon?”

“I’m sure,” she nodded, smiling. “Have fun, boys.”

She saw them off at the door with a travel mug of coffee and a quick kiss for each of them, and then they were rattling downstairs in the elevator. The winter air felt cold after the shower Tom had taken not ten minutes ago. He breathed in deeply, trying to clear his head. Maybe he had caught a cold. His head felt stuffy and ached with each click-click of Bill’s boot heels against the pavement. The car doors made too much noise as they opened and closed. Tom grimaced, the back of his skull hitting the headrest atop his seat.

“What’s going on with you? Why are you grumpy?” Bill asked him, not bothering to beat around the bush now that they were alone.

“I’m not grumpy!” Tom snapped.

Bill glanced at him meaningfully, his pierced eyebrow raised. “Uh-hu.”

Tom sighed. “I didn’t sleep well, okay? I wanted to spend the morning inside my girlfriend, but instead I get to drive around with you when you haven’t even slept and you’re probably going to drive the car off a bridge and kill us both--”

Bill laughed too loudly. He started the car and maneuvered it out into the Saturday morning traffic. “Relax. I’m not even that tired. The conversation I had was very…stimulating.”

Tom stared at his twin’s profile. The corners of Bill’s mouth were twitching, but he wasn’t bursting at the seams with his usual glee. He wore a secret smile, like he knew something he couldn’t yet say, something too wondrous to put into words. It bothered Tom. “So you like him?” he prodded. “Robert?”

“Yes,” Bill said levelly. “I like him.”

“Do you like him or do you like him?” Tom wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“Tom,” his twin sighed. “Let’s not jinx it, okay?”

That was answer enough, really. “So it’s love at first sight?” Tom persisted.

“Maybe,” Bill said mysteriously.

“Why won’t you just tell me?” Tom knew he sounded petulant like a little kid, but it wasn’t like Bill to make such a secret of his feelings, at least not between them.

Bill steered the car out of town, onto the autobahn. “I haven’t met anyone in so long, I’m not sure I know what I’m supposed to feel like.”

Tom stared at him. “But you would know.” He made vague fluttery gestures with his hands like Bill usually did. “You’re always going on about love.”

His twin gave him a lopsided grin. “What do I know, Tom. You’re the one in the longterm relationship.”

“Yes, but…” Even after all these months, Tom didn’t think he could put his feelings for Erika into words. Oh, he’d put them in music, but even that fell short when he looked at her and saw his whole universe reflected back at him in her blue eyes. One day, he’d thought, Bill would meet someone he could love, and then he’d find them both the words to speak of it the way Tom couldn’t. “I always thought you’d just know.”

“I don’t know. Or maybe I do.” Bill’s breath hitched. “Robert, he’s… special. I want to see him again.” His voice was soft, pleading for Tom’s understanding. “Is that okay?”

Tom shifted uncomfortably in his seat. When Erika had first suggested that Bill needed a partner, he’d agreed, but now that her matchmaking was actually working out, he realized he hadn’t quite believed this day would ever come. It had always been a vague fear at the back of his mind, much like one feared cancer or freak accidents, but with the realities of their life being what they were, he hadn’t honestly expected that either of them would ever find a lover who could even come close to inspiring the sort of feeling that existed naturally between the twins.

Being with Erika had felt like a fluke, a crazy stroke of good luck that he hardly deserved; it had not made him a romantic, and Tom found himself lacking the cheerful words of encouragement now that Bill had given him when Tom fell for Erika. It wasn’t in Tom’s nature to fling himself headfirst into the emotional turmoil of a new relationship; he had fought his own feelings with all his might when he met her, and in spite of all that had happened since, now that Bill had met someone, Tom found that his instincts hadn’t changed. Love was messy and complicated. He didn’t like it interfering with the order of things, the harmony of all the different pieces of his life that moved together peacefully in Tom’s own personal cosmos.

Bill was different, he thrived on chaos; that didn’t mean Tom had to like it, but he loved his brother, and he knew what he had to say. “You don’t need my blessing.”

“Of course I do,” Bill said, but his smile was bright with sudden joy. “I couldn’t be with someone you don’t like.”

Picturing all the different ways in which his life might change now made Tom’s head hurt. He didn’t like change. “Oh, so you are going to be with him?”

“I don’t know.” Bill smiled that odd, smug smile again that tickled the corners of his mouth and made Tom’s chest feel tight. “We’ll have to wait and see what he has to say about that, I think.” The words were casual, light, but a slight tremor in Bill’s voice betrayed them. When Tom looked at his twin, he saw shaky hands gripping the steering wheel tight, quick, shallow, open-mouthed breaths, like they were on a rollercoaster, poised at the highest high, ready to fall.

He couldn’t let Bill fall alone.

Tom took a deep breath and said, “Has there ever been anyone we couldn’t have?” in his cockiest interview voice, and Bill laughed out loudly with relief.

“You’re too full of yourself.”

“Statistics would show that I have every right to be,” Tom smirked.

His twin guffawed, the tension broken. “Well, your girlfriend is ridiculously beautiful.”

“That’s right,” Tom nodded, pleased.

“And she looked so happy to have you back last night, for whatever reason,” Bill snickered and received a hard jab in response. “You got so lucky with her.”

“I did.” Tom smiled. Bill had always liked her, but singing Erika’s praises had become one of his favorite pastimes ever since the twins’ twenty-first birthday, over a year ago now, when she’d managed to come up with a recipe for vegetarian cheeseburgers that tasted exactly like the real thing, and gifted Bill a portrait of himself done entirely in glitter paint. His admiration for her talents knew no bounds, which amused Tom, because he’d found it hard to believe that anyone could adore Erika more than he did, but Bill came close.

He grinned. “Did you get laid last night?”

Tom snorted softly. Bill’s curiosity was insatiable. “Not really.”

“What’s that mean?”

“We didn’t quite make it there.” Tom rolled his eyes when his twin gave up any pretence of watching traffic in favor of staring at him. “She touched me and I just lost it.”

“Oh, rude!” Bill laughed. “What did she say?”

“She wasn’t pleased. But I took care of her too,” Tom defended himself.

“Well, that’s the least you could do.” Bill shifted gears, and the car lurched forwards. “Let’s get this meeting over with quickly so you can get back there and do it right.”

Tom didn’t have any objections to that whatsoever and, as it turned out, he wasn’t the only one eager to get back home. When they arrived at the studio, Georg was standing outside in the yard, bundled up in his winter coat and a woolly hat pulled low into his face against the cold. He was pacing back and forth, hectically puffing at a cigarette. “There you are!” he greeted them when Bill and Tom climbed out of the car. “You’re late.”

Tom glanced at his watch. “Five minutes! And you have no room to talk!”

Their usually laid-back bassist bounced in place with all the nervous energy Bill usually displayed when high on Red Bull and pre-show adrenaline. “Can we do this quickly? Janina called, I need to get home, she’s going to kill me if I don’t finish the nursery before the baby arrives.”

“You’re going to set up a nursery?” Gustav asked doubtfully from the door. He’d come down from the studio apartment when the car pulled up and now waved at his band mates. “I hope there won’t be any power tools involved.”

With how clumsy Georg was, Tom had to agree that maybe the bassist should leave the home improvement to a professional. Georg had enough on his plate as it was, with his pregnant girlfriend almost at her due date. “How are you holding up?” he asked his friend. “Getting a little nervous?”

“Scared shitless,” Georg admitted. He shivered with the cold and nerves. “She said she really wants me to be there for the birth. I can’t say no.”

“Look at it this way,” said Gustav, who was already a hands-on uncle to a niece and nephew. “When it’s over, you’ll have a beautiful baby boy.”

“That is debatable,” Tom said dryly. “If he’s beautiful, it’ll be all thanks to Janina.”

Georg smacked his shoulder. “Shut up.”

“Leave him alone,” Bill agreed for once. “Look at his cold sores! He doesn’t need you to stress him out more.”

Georg covered his blistered mouth with a gloved hand. “Please don’t take my side.”

Bill laughed. In the harsh white light that reflected off the snowy yard, the lines under his eyes were dark and prominent, but he looked cheery and eager to get to work. He clapped his hands and the others huddled around him, long used to taking their cues from him. “Shall we get to work, boys?”

“Please.” Gustav stood aside to let them in through the glass door. The entrace hall was almost as cold as the yard, but in the studio proper, the heating was on and a coffee pot with four mugs sat on the table by the old, ratty couch that had already been there when they first came here, almost ten years ago. These days, they did the recording sessions in the basement at the twins’ house, but their old producer had allowed them the use of the studio for business purposes so they didn’t have to give interviews and meet staff at Tom and Bill’s private house. It was a good arrangement; coming here still felt like home, even now that they were on their own. It was reassuring.

Tom fell on the couch and poured himself another mug of liquid life. Gustav’s coffee wasn’t as good as Erika’s, but he came close. Tom toasted the drummer with his mug. “Thanks, man.”

“You look like hell,” Gustav told him. “Are you sick?”

“I can’t be around sick people,” Georg said at once. “Janina--”

“I’m not sick,” Tom assured him. He glanced over at Bill, who had taken to pacing the length of the room, too wired to sit still. “We didn’t get much sleep.”

“And why is that?” For someone who appeared as uninterested in the goings-on around him as Gustav did, he was remarkably nosy. “You went to see your girlfriend after all, didn’t you.”

“Lucky,” Georg huffed. “I want to go home too! Who scheduled this meeting, anyway?”

“I did,” Bill said. “We’re already underpaying Benjamin, we can’t make him do PR for us too. We’ll need a professional in the new year. And a secretary. Maybe someone who can do both. This was the only date before Christmas that we’re all in town. So unless you want to start writing press releases--”

“No,” Georg said sullenly. “All right! It’s fine.”

They’d all rather be somewhere else, Tom thought as he looked around at the tired faces of his band mates. Their trip had been tough: four weeks on the road, driving themselves when their two security guys got tired, managing everything from the bookings right down to getting a decent meal without any handlers or staff save for a few technicians they’d hired locally to set up their stage equipment. Tom had never properly appreciated all that David and Benjamin, Dunja and Silke had done for them until their former team had hugged them goodbye and seen them off at the studio as they set out on their road trip. He’d felt a little like a kid going on a class trip for the first time, leaving the worried parents behind. It was awesome and scary; but most of all, it was costly.

Without Universal’s millions to back them, they had all pooled their resources, but Georg was about to become a father and Gustav was still paying off his apartment and his parents’ house. Tom didn’t blame them for wanting to hang on to their savings, he and Bill had always been more involved in the business side of things than their band mates, but it meant that the twins had had to invest most of what had once been a considerable fortune into the future of the band.

After the money they’d lost on the Humanoid album and tour, buying out of the contract with Universal had hurt. They’d negotiated a tough deal that had the record company bosses cursing, and at that point, Tom had just been glad they’d been able to get out of the remaining contract at all. Still, getting out and keeping the band name had cost. They’d finished setting up the studio in the twins’ basement too on the advice of their tax lawyer, although Tom really didn’t see the logic in spending money to save money. Add to that the everyday expenses of renting venues, travelling around, and keeping a band in pizza and Red Bull, and Tom felt skint again for the first time in eight years. It wasn’t a feeling he was used to anymore. He didn’t like it.

Bill was right though, they did need a few helpers if they were going to keep the band functioning at the same level it had before, and so they had to find, at the very least, someone to handle the media and coordinate their meetings and appointments. Benjamin had taken a pay cut to keep working with them as their manager, but like Jost, he was involved with other bands now too, his main focus was elsewhere, and responsibility was on the band’s shoulders when it came down to the everyday details.

Tom nodded at his twin. “So who’s first?”

Bill dug through his enormous handbag and fished out the thick personal organizer that Tom kept for them both. He handed it over and Tom thumbed through the color-coded pages to today’s date.

“First up is that friend of Benjamin’s, the one who went to school with him,” Tom tried to jog the others’ memory of the conversation they’d had with their manager.

“What are his qualifications?” Gustav asked, brow furrowing above the thick black rim of his glasses.

Tom spared a mournful thought for the times when David had dealt with new staff. One would’ve thought the independent life would be less corporate bullshit, more rock’n’roll, but things were pretty damn lame when they were sitting around with a cup of coffee, inquiring after someone’s job qualifications. It was necessary, but Tom still felt silly for it.

He turned a few pages in the organizer to find the notes he’d taken during their conversation with Benjamin. “He’s worked freelance for some newspapers and music magazines,” he read out. “No public relations background to speak of, but Benjamin said he could write a good press release, and he’s a cool guy.”

There was a knock on the door. “We’ll see about that,” Georg said, rising, and went to let in the first candidate.

The following hours dragged on in an agonizing string of interviews with the different people Benjamin or David had sent their way. There was the aforementioned freelance journalist, who’d arrived to his interview smelling of pot and staring randomly into the middle distance; the highly qualified, extremely experienced middle-aged woman in a pants suit who’d previously worked as media liaison for some politician; two giggly girls whom Georg had deemed too suspicious to even let into the house; and, finally, the former Bravo reporter David knew from his Bed and Breakfast days. He was a nice guy around David’s age, in a proper, baby blue shirt and cleanly pressed jeans. He had a calm demeanor that Tom found soothing, but maybe a tad too friendly for the job they were offering.

“So you’ve worked at Bravo,” he said, pensive. “D’you know what our fans are like?”

The man - Rolf - smiled ruefully. “I wasn’t working for Bravo anymore when you started out. These past seven years, I’ve worked mostly for radio stations.”

“You write about music, or…?” Bill inquired. After his third cup of coffee, he still looked pale and hungover, but alert enough to take turns with Tom questioning the guy.

“I do reports on local news these days,” Rolf said, and laughed. “I haven’t written about music since I did the big Bravo stories on David’s band, back in the day. But I know the business and I can handle my media colleagues. And I have connections to a dozen radio stations. David said that might be useful to you?”

The twins exchanged a glance, then looked at Gustav and Georg, who shrugged. “It might be,” Bill said. “Can we get back to you? I think we need to discuss all this.”

“Sure,” the man said easily, and rose. “It was nice meeting you.”

They all shook hands in a business-like manner. “We’ll call you,” Tom promised. “In a few days, maybe?”

“Yeah, great!” The man looked at them fondly like a long-lost big brother, which reminded Tom greatly of David. “You take care, boys.”

Tom saw him off at the door, then closed the curtains in the entrance hall and went back to his band mates. “So?” One look at Bill, who had taken to pacing around the room again, and Tom knew his twin was thinking the same thing he was. “Too--”

“…nice,” Bill finished, nodding. “We need someone who’ll mudwrestle Bild, and win. He was more like a dorky uncle. Let him stay with the local news.” Sighing deeply, he fell on the couch next to Gustav. “The stoner was fun, but useless. And I couldn’t stand the uptight schoolmarm.”

The other three nodded. They had all had the same knee-jerk reaction to the woman in the business suit. “Back to the drawing board then,” Georg summed up, huffing. “Great. I don’t have time for this.”

“None of us do,” Bill told him testily.

“Do you have a pregnant girlfriend at home?” Georg didn’t usually get snappish; he was the calm center of the storm that raged all around him when the twins got hyper and Gustav threw bitch fits. He had to be under a lot of stress.

Tom laid a careful hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Come on, let’s go have a cigarette, then you can go home.”

“I thought you were trying to quit smoking,” Georg grumbled, but he followed Tom outside anyway, grabbing his winter jacket from a hook by the door.

“I am,” Tom said, “But you promised Janina you’d quit when your boy gets here, so let’s enjoy it while we can.” He leaned against the hood of Bill’s car and held out his pack of cigarettes to Georg. They both lit up, silently breathing smoke into the cold winter air for a while, huddled close together for warmth.

“So what do we do about our PR person?” Tom wondered aloud.

“You decide,” Georg said at once. “I really need to get back to Janina, her due date is too close, I can’t risk leaving her alone, I’m sorry.”

Tom nodded. “How’s she doing?”

“She’s huge.” That brought a smile to Georg’s face. He brushed back a strand of wavy hair that the wind had pulled from his pony tail. “She’s okay. Or so she tells me.”

Tom could feel how tense his friend was when he shifted closer and leaned in against Georg’s shoulder. “Call us when you get home, okay? Let us know how things are.”

“Sure.” Georg smiled gratefully. “Are you coming to Magdeburg for Christmas?”

“Yeah, of course.” Christmas at home was tradition, just like the annual band’s brunch at Gustav’s parents’ house on Boxing Day. Tom elbowed the bassist lightly. “With any luck, you’ll be bringing your son along to Gustav’s, right?”

“Right.” Georg shivered ever so slightly. “If Nina’s up to it by then.”

It was only three weeks until Christmas, but they all had a lot going on until then. There were business decisions to be made, Bill wanted to record some vocals, and Georg was going to be a dad. It was pretty incredible. They’d all been getting antsy, Georg’s excitement rubbing off on them while they were on tour, and now it was almost time. Tom still couldn’t wrap his mind around the idea that in less than two weeks, a little baby was going to be added to their crazy bunch.

“She’s going to be a great mom,” Tom smirked. “And you… Well, I guess the kid will always have something to laugh about.”

Huffing, Georg elbowed him back, right in Tom’s bony ribcage. Tom winced, the laughter being knocked out of him with the impact. He rubbed at his chest, grumbling.

“I don’t know how Erika is still putting up with you,” Georg said in mock tones of hurt. “She’s such a nice girl.”

Erika. Even thinking of her made Tom’s insides feel warm. He thought of her cozy apartment, the muted lights in the windows and the softness of her sheets against his skin as he lay down and took her in his arms, breathing in the scent of cookies that clung to her after she’d baked. He couldn’t wait to get back to her; he understood Georg all too well. “Erika,” he sighed on a long, smoky breath. “She introduced Bill to someone. A friend of hers. Someone he actually liked.”

Georg raised his eyebrows. “Someone he liked liked?”

“Yeah. I couldn’t believe it either,” Tom said dryly.

“When was this?” Georg asked, surprised.

“Last night.”

“Oh, is that why he looks like he hasn’t slept in a month?” Georg laughed. “I was afraid he was coming down with something.”

“He’s coming down with love,” Tom snorted.

Georg studied his face quizzically for a few moments, until Tom looked away at his feet stubbing out the cigarette. “You don’t like the guy?”

“I do.” Tom shrugged. “It’s just weird, he hasn’t had anyone in so long--”

“Or ever.”

“I need to get used to the idea, I guess.” Tom shuffled his feet. It was cold outside. The winter wind blew harshly, and even though it was only early afternoon, the light was hazy and grey. The sky above them was darkening with high clouds. There would be more snow later. It was time for Georg and Gustav to get going if they wanted to make it to Magdeburg before dark. “We should go.”

“We should.” Georg stood still for a moment longer, a solid presence at Tom’s side. “Don’t worry about Bill too much. I know we always baby him, but it’s not like he really needs it. He’s stronger than all of us combined.”

“I didn’t say I was worried,” Tom said testily.

Georg cracked a small smile. “You didn’t have to.”

“Smartass.” Tom reached out and hugged his friend. “Take care, okay? Say hi to Janina.”

“Will do.” They made their way back inside, and Georg went right for the stairs to the apartment above the studio. “I’ll just go pack up.”

Nodding, Tom went back into the anteroom to find his twin and Gustav still on the couch. The drummer was determinedly finishing up the last of the cookies, while Bill’s tiredness had finally won out. He was asleep with his head on Gustav’s shoulder, making soft little noises and smacking his lips occasionally because Bill’s mouth couldn’t stand still even in sleep. He was hugging the drummer’s muscular arm to his chest, clinging to Gustav like a little monkey to its mother.

Tom snorted softly before he leaned down and tapped Bill’s shoulder. “Bill.”

Bill drooled on Gustav’s shoulder, but didn’t wake up.

“Bill, come on, we’re going home.” Tom grabbed his twin around the waist with both arms and hauled him up off the sofa. Bill’s legs dangled like a rag doll’s for a moment before Tom set him on his feet, keeping an arm around him so he wouldn’t fall.

Bill’s eyelids fluttered. He grabbed at thin air with his hands, clumsy and uncoordinated. “Nooo! I want Gustav!”

“Georg and I need to get going,” Gustav said, much more gently than he ever would’ve talked to anyone else. “You can sleep on me next time we see each other, okay? It’ll be your Christmas present.”

“But I want to sleep nooooooow!” Bill whined.

“You can sleep in your bed at home,” Tom told him.

“But I don’t want to sleep alone.” Bill’s face scrunched up like a baby’s. “You’re mean!”

“Fine,” Tom huffed. “You can sleep in my bed. Come on.”

Bill made little noises of protest as Tom and Gustav dragged him to the car and hauled him into his seat. Tom buckled him in, then turned to the drummer for a quick hug. “Let us know when you get home, okay?” he told Gustav too, because Georg was bound to forget the minor details when he got back to his pregnant girlfriend. “And don’t you try driving!”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence,” Gustav snorted. He patted Bill’s knee, then closed the car door. Their singer was already asleep again, reclining in the passenger seat.

“Just looking out for you,” Tom smirked.

“Look out for yourself. And him.” Gustav jerked his chin at Bill. “He told me about that guy he met. Call me if you need help getting rid of a corpse.”

Both his friends knew him entirely too well, Tom thought. He clapped Gustav’s shoulder gratefully. “Will do. Thanks, man.”

“Oh, don’t be that way.” Georg came out of the house carrying a big suitcase and his bass in a travel case. “He only just met the guy! Maybe it won’t even go anywhere.”

Tom doubted that. Bill never did anything in half measure, once he had his sights set on something, and his sights had seemed set on Robert and his shiny accessories. “But if it does?” he wondered. “You know Bill, he’ll dive in head first--”

“So let him enjoy falling in love,” Georg said. “It’s been so long for him, he deserves it.”

“He doesn’t deserve getting hurt,” Gustav said gruffly, and Tom felt rough affection for their drummer rise inside him, making his chest feel tight. After a month on the road together, he’d miss Gustav and Georg.

“I’ll take care of everything,” he promised.

“Good luck finding someone for the PR job,” Gustav said. “Call me if anything happens, okay? I have a feeling Georg will be useless for the next couple of weeks.”

Georg dropped his bag into the trunk of his car, then gave Gustav the finger with his free hand. “Be nice, you need me to drive you home.”

Tom chuckled. “You two idiots drive safely, okay?”

He hugged them both goodbye, then fished the car keys from the assortment of junk that was the contents of Bill’s handbag and drove off along the pebbled driveway, tires crunching on the frozen ground. He didn’t like watching other people leave, it always made him sentimental, and after a tour especially, it was weird to let Gustav and Georg go. The band would be reunited soon after Christmas, but when they were, some things would be changed forever.

Tom glanced over at his sleeping twin as he drove the car along the slippery country roads. Bill was sleeping soundly, a small smile tugging at his lips. He was sprawled in the passenger seat, his long body angled towards Tom, instinctively seeking closeness as always. Tom shifted gears, then laid his hand briefly on Bill’s shoulder. “We’ll be okay,” he sighed. “We will.”

There was no answer. Tom gripped the steering wheel, looking out at the road signs with tired eyes. He wanted to go faster so they’d be home sooner, but for once, he didn’t dare to. With Bill breathing deeply in sleep next to him, it would be so easy to doze off too in the warm, quiet car, and then they’d end up in a ditch somewhere, merry fucking Christmas. Tom had other plans, he had things to do, and Bill’s love life wasn’t even the main concern. He had phone calls to make this afternoon - to David, to Benjamin, to a couple of marketing experts their managers had hooked them up with - and he had to find them a publicist, all on his own, because his twin surely wouldn’t rise from the dead for at least twenty-four hours and the rest of the band were excused on account of the fact that it had been Tom who’d wanted to get more involved in the business side of things in the first place.

He sighed. Maybe things would look like less of a bother after a few hours of sleep. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, glancing out the window to make sure there was no police around to catch him fiddling with his mobile while driving. Satisfied that he was safe, he steered the car onto the highway back into town and dialled Erika’s number.

“Becker!” she answered the phone cheerfully after a couple of rings.

“It’s me, Cinnamon Buns.” Tom found himself smiling as her voice washed over him warmly.

“Hey! I was wondering where you were. Are you guys coming over for lunch?”

“Bill’s asleep, I’m taking him home,” Tom said. “I was wondering if you could meet us at our place?”

“Oh, um. Sure! I’ll ask Nele if I can take her car--” There was murmuring in the background. “Even better, Robert is going to drop me off. It’s on the way home for him.”

“He’s still there? Does he have a life?” Tom made a face. The guy must’ve been at Erika’s place for almost twenty-four hours now; didn’t he have other things to do, a home to go to?

“We’re almost finished with our term paper,” Erika told him, and Tom could hear the silent reprimand in her voice. “We decided to push through with it this morning, since we were interrupted last night.” There was more talking behind her, out of earshot. “Robert says I shouldn’t say we were interrupted. He says he really enjoyed meeting you guys.” She paused hopefully. “Bill’s asleep?”

“Yes, and I’m not waking him up,” Tom said. “So you’re coming over?”

“Yes, Tom, I’m on my way,” she sighed. “See you soon. Love you!”

Grunting, Tom hung up, and felt bad for his grumpy ways almost immediately. She’d stolen the duvet again at night, but other than that, it wasn’t her fault that he was feeling so tired and drained. On the contrary, being with her was the one thing he looked forward to right now. He didn’t need Georg anymore to tell him that this was no way to treat his girlfriend, the woman who’d told him she loved him only to get hung up on. Cursing under his breath, Tom fished out his phone and dialled again.

This time, it took her a little longer to pick up. “Becker, hello?”

“I love you too, okay?” he said, low, glancing around to make sure Bill was still asleep. “I’m sorry. I’m just… I don’t know, tired.”

She laughed quietly. “I know, Tom. Will veggie burgers cheer you up? I can do homemade fries again too.”

Relieved, he sighed. “Yeah, sounds good.”

“I’ll be there in a bit. Is it okay if I let myself in? I forgot to give you back the key.” She’d looked after the few plants their mother had given them and sorted out the mail while they were away. Tom hadn’t even spared the key another thought after he’d given it to her. Erika’s clothes hung in his wardrobe, her toothbrush shared a cup with his in his bathroom, she had her own breakfast mug at the twins’ house. He was already used to her coming and going, the same way he did at her place.

He thought about it for a moment. “Keep the key,” he said. Chances were he’d pass out as soon as he reached even the vicinity of his bed, and wouldn’t be able to make it to the door if he wanted to. “We’ll be upstairs.”

“Okay. Can’t wait to see you.”

“Me too.” This time, when he hung up, he felt much better about things than before. He took the next exit, slowing down carefully again as the car entered the city. The streets of Hamburg flashed past in a haze of grey winter fog, but happy as he was to be back here, Tom couldn’t appreciate the wintery scenery, or the Christmas decorations that lined the houses left and right. He only wanted to get home.

For once, no fans stood outside their gate; maybe word hadn’t gotten around yet that they were back. The house lay in silence as Tom dragged his groggy, unresponsive brother out of the car and up the stairs to the front door, where he disabled the alarm.

Bill didn’t like being manhandled. He grunted sleepily. “Ow, don’t be so rough.”

“Don’t be so heavy,” Tom retorted. Bill was anything but heavy, but Tom didn’t feel up to carrying him to his bedroom. “Come on, we’re almost there.”

They made it up to the first floor of the house leaning into each other, swaying and groaning like two drunk pirates. At Bill’s bedroom door, Tom made to push him away, but his twin clung with surprisingly strong hands. “Nooo. You promised cuddles!”

“I didn’t!” Tom huffed. “Erika’s coming over, and I’d rather share my bed with her.”

“Don’t care,” Bill grunted. “Bed. Now.” He stumbled over the threshold into Tom’s room and fell into bed face-first, his arms spread out to hug all the pillows, claiming space like he was the uncrowned King of Everything. He was snoring before Tom had even pulled his boots off him.

Tom unwound Bill’s long scarf from around his neck so he wouldn’t strangle himself in his sleep, then yanked the blankets out from under Bill to cover him. Bill curled up on his side, and Tom seized his chance to crawl into bed too, still fully dressed, taking up the newly freed space. His bed felt like home, unlike the cheap hotel beds with their scratchy sheets and their smell of generic laundry detergent. Tom closed his eyes and breathed deeply. His twin’s hair tickled his nose, but that was okay. They’d spent so much time together on the road, it would’ve felt strange to be all alone now for the first time in weeks. Tom shifted closer, lulled by the warmth of his bed and the peace that descended over him now that he was finally here.

He was only vaguely aware of a female voice whispering, “Aw, you guys!” and a camera clicking before he drifted off to sleep. Gentle hands brushed his cheek, tucked him in, and then he knew nothing anymore except that he was warm and comfortable at last.

The world could wait for a little while.

peki, bandom

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