I'm not dead :-) So that's good...
Work got a little hectic, I got very worn out, the kids got very worn out, and LJ fell by the wayside, so if you notice a rush of posts over the next two weeks that's me trying to catch up at least a little.
The hardest thing about coming back is where to start and then what to share myself.
A current them of my LJ has been cosplay so I'll start there. Cosplay has been on my mind a lot because I'm doing waaay more cons this year than last year. Basically each con I've gone to I've had a different experience so while on the surface it might sound like doing the same thing over and over it hasn't been and I really feel like it's a positive thing that I can choose to make a priority in terms of my own leisure time right now. Since I first started using the internet about 18 years ago my internet usage has been a coping mechanism of sorts for the mismatch between my interests and the interests of those around me. Over the years I've had a few 'real life' friends/coworkers/classmates etc whose interests overlapped with mine but the internet is one of the only spaces where I've felt a degree of comfort in my obsessive passionate fannish personality. Stories and characters matter to me just as much as football does to football fans and for me its not enough to feel that in my heart I need to express it and share it with others. Hence the internet. But going to cons is like... the internet made tangible and real. Maybe I don't know. At any rate I know that the fortnight before Brisbane Oz Comic Con I really felt like I was struggling to hang in there with work/kids/exhaustion and it was like a life raft. The whole time I was walking around that con I felt relaxed and happy. I don't get enough of that in my life.
So I decided to buy tickets for Armageddon in Melbourne and to push forward with my general plan of going to Brisbane Supanova. So that gives me three more con days in the calendar year.
But what to wear????
I know I could just wear a fannish t-shirt and be done with it, and my interest in cosplaying is sort of irrational - after all I'm not some stunning thin 18 year old who looks amazing in any costume. And my cosplay choices are based totally on liking a character or wanting to focus on a fandom rather than what suits me. But I get something out of it. It's hard to define because it really has been different with each costume, just as each con has been different. So I might leave that essay for another day. But it's powerful stuff, it's silly and its intangible but it's a force of good in my life right now. Which can't just be about my kids and my job or I'll go crazy (-ier).
Soooo
For Arma I have a Whovian ticket, that means I'm going to Jenna's panel and I get a photo and an auto. I wasn't sure I even wanted the photo but I wanted to go to the panel and just be part of the fandom so bugger it, why not?
But I have no idea yet what I'm wearing. I want it to be something from the Whoniverse. A friend just get Osgood really well & I'd have a lot of fun doing her but then because I'm actually getting a photo with Jenna I want it to be something Jenna would recognise or notice and I've learnt my lesson, cosplays that are obvious to us are not necessarily obvious to the actors. They don't live in our world (except for maybe Osric Chau ;-) and Felicity Day).
I do have very special (possibly,.. if it works....) dress on order for the Jenny Flint cosplay I have planned for Brisbane Supanova (because Neve who plays Vastra is going to be there...) but I think it'll be too big to take to Melbourne (it's a short trip and i haven't paid heaps for extra luggage). And it may not even be here yet.
I could use my Riversong stuff but I'd rather do something new. I was thinking fem!11 or fem!10 but I'm not sure... I don't think 13's cool coat will work on me. And I've tried Clara before and it's so tricky because I'm not her build and ultimately she hasn't got hugely recognisable outfits that are easy to come by (keeping in mind Urban Outfitters is never going to fit me!).
I also have two anime cosplays I'm working on but I don't want to do anime for Arma & I'll fill you in more on those later. I'm even more worried about the dress I ordered for Princess Nike from The World Is Still Beautiful than I am about the Jenny Flint dress.
So there's some of the debris of my thoughts right now. There's much more, I really wanted to write about Attack on Titan but I'll get to that next time.
The hardest thing about coming back is where to start and then what to share myself.
A current them of my LJ has been cosplay so I'll start there. Cosplay has been on my mind a lot because I'm doing waaay more cons this year than last year. Basically each con I've gone to I've had a different experience so while on the surface it might sound like doing the same thing over and over it hasn't been and I really feel like it's a positive thing that I can choose to make a priority in terms of my own leisure time right now. Since I first started using the internet about 18 years ago my internet usage has been a coping mechanism of sorts for the mismatch between my interests and the interests of those around me. Over the years I've had a few 'real life' friends/coworkers/classmates etc whose interests overlapped with mine but the internet is one of the only spaces where I've felt a degree of comfort in my obsessive passionate fannish personality. Stories and characters matter to me just as much as football does to football fans and for me its not enough to feel that in my heart I need to express it and share it with others. Hence the internet. But going to cons is like... the internet made tangible and real. Maybe I don't know. At any rate I know that the fortnight before Brisbane Oz Comic Con I really felt like I was struggling to hang in there with work/kids/exhaustion and it was like a life raft. The whole time I was walking around that con I felt relaxed and happy. I don't get enough of that in my life.
So I decided to buy tickets for Armageddon in Melbourne and to push forward with my general plan of going to Brisbane Supanova. So that gives me three more con days in the calendar year.
But what to wear????
I know I could just wear a fannish t-shirt and be done with it, and my interest in cosplaying is sort of irrational - after all I'm not some stunning thin 18 year old who looks amazing in any costume. And my cosplay choices are based totally on liking a character or wanting to focus on a fandom rather than what suits me. But I get something out of it. It's hard to define because it really has been different with each costume, just as each con has been different. So I might leave that essay for another day. But it's powerful stuff, it's silly and its intangible but it's a force of good in my life right now. Which can't just be about my kids and my job or I'll go crazy (-ier).
Soooo
For Arma I have a Whovian ticket, that means I'm going to Jenna's panel and I get a photo and an auto. I wasn't sure I even wanted the photo but I wanted to go to the panel and just be part of the fandom so bugger it, why not?
But I have no idea yet what I'm wearing. I want it to be something from the Whoniverse. A friend just get Osgood really well & I'd have a lot of fun doing her but then because I'm actually getting a photo with Jenna I want it to be something Jenna would recognise or notice and I've learnt my lesson, cosplays that are obvious to us are not necessarily obvious to the actors. They don't live in our world (except for maybe Osric Chau ;-) and Felicity Day).
I do have very special (possibly,.. if it works....) dress on order for the Jenny Flint cosplay I have planned for Brisbane Supanova (because Neve who plays Vastra is going to be there...) but I think it'll be too big to take to Melbourne (it's a short trip and i haven't paid heaps for extra luggage). And it may not even be here yet.
I could use my Riversong stuff but I'd rather do something new. I was thinking fem!11 or fem!10 but I'm not sure... I don't think 13's cool coat will work on me. And I've tried Clara before and it's so tricky because I'm not her build and ultimately she hasn't got hugely recognisable outfits that are easy to come by (keeping in mind Urban Outfitters is never going to fit me!).
I also have two anime cosplays I'm working on but I don't want to do anime for Arma & I'll fill you in more on those later. I'm even more worried about the dress I ordered for Princess Nike from The World Is Still Beautiful than I am about the Jenny Flint dress.
So there's some of the debris of my thoughts right now. There's much more, I really wanted to write about Attack on Titan but I'll get to that next time.