Burying Dean
After Sam left, the pain in Ben's head was cut in half with two voices slowly disappearing into nothing. Ben had to admit that it was nice here at Bobby's place - it was so quiet. Not like on that bridge where just having everyone around literally threatened to split his head open.
But as Ben walked away from the door, he stopped by the dining room to where Dean's body was. His fingers played with the ring now on his hand as he looked at his father's closed eyes.
He still remembered the feelings from Dean. There were no words spoken. It was a sense of desperation, followed by relief, acceptance, and then a wordless order for him to finish it before Meg got the upper hand. The raw pain from Sam and Alec nearly made him go unconscious, so he clung onto that order to keep him moving as his fingers found the knife.
The feelings of sympathy made Ben lift his head to see Bobby in the kitchen doorway. "Come on, son. We've got a coffin to make still."
"Put your back into it kid," Bobby said, his back against the wall of a broken shed.
"I'm trying to." Ben was pushed the crow bar as hard as he could, and there was creaking from the wood but nothing was giving. However, Ben was too scrawny from when Meg had been in him and didn't have enough weight to use.
Finally Bobby got up and pushed Ben away. "Move over. We don't got all day." He stuck the crowbar in and braced his leg, popping the wood off the support beam easily. Ben stood back, shoving his hands in his pockets as he just watched.
"So you're not good at construction, you're not a good hunter, what the hell are you good at?" Bobby asked when he was done, rubbing his hands on his jeans. "Just cause Sam asked me to watch over you don't mean I'm just going to let you sit around. You're gonna earn your keep here."
"I'm not trying to be a problem, Bobby."
"I know yer not." Bobby took off his hat long enough to wipe his brow.
Looking around the junkyard, a small smile came to his lips. "Well, I do know a thing or two about cars."
Bobby looked at Ben, then just started to laugh. "Never would have guessed that one," he joked. "I swear, when Dean introduced us I would never have imagined just how much you are like him."
Bobby started to lean down to grab the wooden planks, but Ben moved faster and grabbed them. He needed to do something after all. But he didn't know how to respond to that, instead just grabbing as much as he could. Then he felt a wave of pure sadness wash over him and Ben nearly stumbled as sympathetic tears came to his eyes.
"Bobby, I'm sorry..."
"Nothing you could have done, kid," was the reply as Bobby got the rest of the wood and started walking to the garage where his tools were set up.
"But -"
"No buts." Bobby threw the wood down and glared at Ben. "Don't you start following this Winchester route of self-pity and loathing. That was what got your father killed more than anything that any demon has ever done to us. Sam and Dean both felt they always had to be the sacrifice. That they weren't good enough. You want to make your father proud, then you stop this damn mindset. You did what he asked you to, and that's that."
Ben put his wood down as well. "Both my parents have died because of demons using me, or trying to hurt me. I don't want anyone else getting hurt."
Bobby snorted. "Well, that explains why Sam's taken a liking to you."
"Dean never told me much about his parents, but I know a bit."
"I never knew Mary. I didn't meet John until he was already neck deep in this business. But those boys... children shouldn't have to live the life of a hunter. Dean never had a chance to get out, but Sammy did. And he tried, but the demons just pulled him back in."
Bobby was measuring the wood while Ben sat on a crate, listening.
"Dean started to fall apart when his father died." Bobby stopped a moment, then shook his head. "Your granddaddy was a son of a bitch, selling his soul to keep Dean alive, and then telling Dean he might have to kill Sam. After that..."
"Sam went dark side and he lost everything anyway."
"Something like that." Bobby had cut the planks now and were working to put them together. "There's a book over there with a set of charms on it. Grab the electric lighter and start burning them into the wood top."
Ben nodded and went off to do so, drawing them in a sharpie first before burning the lines in carefully.
"You know, Dean was like a son to me. Sam too." Bobby rubbed his eyes. "Never had kids myself, but those two just weaseled their way in."
Ben looked up, pushing his hoodie back as he wiped his forehead. "So does that mean you're my grandpa then?"
Bobby put the nail gun down and just looked at Ben, who gave Bobby a bright Winchester grin. "You call me grandpa and I'll show you the hard way how to use this nail gun."
Ben just smiled and went back to work, and the tension that was coming off of Bobby relaxed into a more gentle wave.
"And we're shaving that damn mohawk," Bobby muttered. "You look like some gothic freak."
When the coffin was done, Bobby led Ben out to a spot on the hill near his house. "I think this is a good spot," he stated, dropping a shovel on the ground.
"So what do I do... just dig?"
"That's what you do when you want to bury something."
"How do I know when to stop?"
Bobby looked at him a moment. "How tall are you?"
"Five nine..." Ben raised an eyebrow.
"Good. When you can't get out of the grave, you're done." With that, Bobby headed back to the house to start working on preparing Dean's body.
Ben just watched him, then grabbed his headphones and turned his IPod on. This was going to be a long afternoon.
At sunset, Ben walked down from the bedroom he was staying in, rubbing a towel over his head. His very bare head that only had a fuzzy layer of hair on it. He had also shaved off the sideburns and facial hair and removed the nose and lip rings. He did keep the earring in though, cause it was kinda cool.
Bobby was in the kitchen finishing up on Dean's body. He had fixed the symbol on his chest with a sewing needle and ink, and was placing a small sac of herbs into his jacket's pocket. The knife wound from Ruby's knife was stitched up and a cotton pad to seep up any leaking blood.
"You look better." Bobby smirked a bit.
"I think I lost five pounds between the hair and the metal."
There was a moment where Ben just stared at Dean, and Bobby cleared his throat. "Come on, son. It's time to lay him to rest."
The grave was filled with a layer of salt. Then the coffin was slowly lowered in. Rock salt filled in the sides and created a layer over the top of the coffin, and then Ben and Bobby worked in silence to fill in the rest with dirt. As Ben smoothed out the last of the dirt, Bobby pounded a cross into the ground to mark the spot.
Ben just stared down at it a moment before he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at Bobby, who squeezed it. "You're giving me a headache," Bobby stated.
"Sorry. I can't help it."
"I know. But we're going to fix that."
"I just want him back, Bobby. I'd give all this up just to have him back again."
"You and me both. Let's get inside. Won't do either of us any good staying out here too long."
"Demons?" Ben looked worried.
"Hell no. It's fricken cold out here, and I haven't eaten dinner yet." he stated towards the house. "You coming?"
"I'll be there in a minute."
Ben watched Bobby walk back to the house and looked at the cross a moment. "I'm so sorry, Dad. But I'm going to learn from Sam, and I'm going to help him. And then maybe I can feel that I'm making you proud again."
With that, he turned and started back to the house as well, wrapping the hoodie tight around him.
But as Ben walked away from the door, he stopped by the dining room to where Dean's body was. His fingers played with the ring now on his hand as he looked at his father's closed eyes.
He still remembered the feelings from Dean. There were no words spoken. It was a sense of desperation, followed by relief, acceptance, and then a wordless order for him to finish it before Meg got the upper hand. The raw pain from Sam and Alec nearly made him go unconscious, so he clung onto that order to keep him moving as his fingers found the knife.
The feelings of sympathy made Ben lift his head to see Bobby in the kitchen doorway. "Come on, son. We've got a coffin to make still."
"Put your back into it kid," Bobby said, his back against the wall of a broken shed.
"I'm trying to." Ben was pushed the crow bar as hard as he could, and there was creaking from the wood but nothing was giving. However, Ben was too scrawny from when Meg had been in him and didn't have enough weight to use.
Finally Bobby got up and pushed Ben away. "Move over. We don't got all day." He stuck the crowbar in and braced his leg, popping the wood off the support beam easily. Ben stood back, shoving his hands in his pockets as he just watched.
"So you're not good at construction, you're not a good hunter, what the hell are you good at?" Bobby asked when he was done, rubbing his hands on his jeans. "Just cause Sam asked me to watch over you don't mean I'm just going to let you sit around. You're gonna earn your keep here."
"I'm not trying to be a problem, Bobby."
"I know yer not." Bobby took off his hat long enough to wipe his brow.
Looking around the junkyard, a small smile came to his lips. "Well, I do know a thing or two about cars."
Bobby looked at Ben, then just started to laugh. "Never would have guessed that one," he joked. "I swear, when Dean introduced us I would never have imagined just how much you are like him."
Bobby started to lean down to grab the wooden planks, but Ben moved faster and grabbed them. He needed to do something after all. But he didn't know how to respond to that, instead just grabbing as much as he could. Then he felt a wave of pure sadness wash over him and Ben nearly stumbled as sympathetic tears came to his eyes.
"Bobby, I'm sorry..."
"Nothing you could have done, kid," was the reply as Bobby got the rest of the wood and started walking to the garage where his tools were set up.
"But -"
"No buts." Bobby threw the wood down and glared at Ben. "Don't you start following this Winchester route of self-pity and loathing. That was what got your father killed more than anything that any demon has ever done to us. Sam and Dean both felt they always had to be the sacrifice. That they weren't good enough. You want to make your father proud, then you stop this damn mindset. You did what he asked you to, and that's that."
Ben put his wood down as well. "Both my parents have died because of demons using me, or trying to hurt me. I don't want anyone else getting hurt."
Bobby snorted. "Well, that explains why Sam's taken a liking to you."
"Dean never told me much about his parents, but I know a bit."
"I never knew Mary. I didn't meet John until he was already neck deep in this business. But those boys... children shouldn't have to live the life of a hunter. Dean never had a chance to get out, but Sammy did. And he tried, but the demons just pulled him back in."
Bobby was measuring the wood while Ben sat on a crate, listening.
"Dean started to fall apart when his father died." Bobby stopped a moment, then shook his head. "Your granddaddy was a son of a bitch, selling his soul to keep Dean alive, and then telling Dean he might have to kill Sam. After that..."
"Sam went dark side and he lost everything anyway."
"Something like that." Bobby had cut the planks now and were working to put them together. "There's a book over there with a set of charms on it. Grab the electric lighter and start burning them into the wood top."
Ben nodded and went off to do so, drawing them in a sharpie first before burning the lines in carefully.
"You know, Dean was like a son to me. Sam too." Bobby rubbed his eyes. "Never had kids myself, but those two just weaseled their way in."
Ben looked up, pushing his hoodie back as he wiped his forehead. "So does that mean you're my grandpa then?"
Bobby put the nail gun down and just looked at Ben, who gave Bobby a bright Winchester grin. "You call me grandpa and I'll show you the hard way how to use this nail gun."
Ben just smiled and went back to work, and the tension that was coming off of Bobby relaxed into a more gentle wave.
"And we're shaving that damn mohawk," Bobby muttered. "You look like some gothic freak."
When the coffin was done, Bobby led Ben out to a spot on the hill near his house. "I think this is a good spot," he stated, dropping a shovel on the ground.
"So what do I do... just dig?"
"That's what you do when you want to bury something."
"How do I know when to stop?"
Bobby looked at him a moment. "How tall are you?"
"Five nine..." Ben raised an eyebrow.
"Good. When you can't get out of the grave, you're done." With that, Bobby headed back to the house to start working on preparing Dean's body.
Ben just watched him, then grabbed his headphones and turned his IPod on. This was going to be a long afternoon.
At sunset, Ben walked down from the bedroom he was staying in, rubbing a towel over his head. His very bare head that only had a fuzzy layer of hair on it. He had also shaved off the sideburns and facial hair and removed the nose and lip rings. He did keep the earring in though, cause it was kinda cool.
Bobby was in the kitchen finishing up on Dean's body. He had fixed the symbol on his chest with a sewing needle and ink, and was placing a small sac of herbs into his jacket's pocket. The knife wound from Ruby's knife was stitched up and a cotton pad to seep up any leaking blood.
"You look better." Bobby smirked a bit.
"I think I lost five pounds between the hair and the metal."
There was a moment where Ben just stared at Dean, and Bobby cleared his throat. "Come on, son. It's time to lay him to rest."
The grave was filled with a layer of salt. Then the coffin was slowly lowered in. Rock salt filled in the sides and created a layer over the top of the coffin, and then Ben and Bobby worked in silence to fill in the rest with dirt. As Ben smoothed out the last of the dirt, Bobby pounded a cross into the ground to mark the spot.
Ben just stared down at it a moment before he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at Bobby, who squeezed it. "You're giving me a headache," Bobby stated.
"Sorry. I can't help it."
"I know. But we're going to fix that."
"I just want him back, Bobby. I'd give all this up just to have him back again."
"You and me both. Let's get inside. Won't do either of us any good staying out here too long."
"Demons?" Ben looked worried.
"Hell no. It's fricken cold out here, and I haven't eaten dinner yet." he stated towards the house. "You coming?"
"I'll be there in a minute."
Ben watched Bobby walk back to the house and looked at the cross a moment. "I'm so sorry, Dad. But I'm going to learn from Sam, and I'm going to help him. And then maybe I can feel that I'm making you proud again."
With that, he turned and started back to the house as well, wrapping the hoodie tight around him.