i dont know what to do

[wayoutthere]

well my parents hate me right now. they think i always sneak around wiht joshy and we got have sex all the time and get high and waisted. they dont trust me...and they dont want me anymore. and im not making this up...these are their words. they are so disappointed in me right now. and i dont know what to do about it. all of this started becasue me and joshy waled home and i was late...then my dad called my cell but i didnt hear it ring...so i didnt answer it. he thinks we were screwing around in the bayou. i tried to tell him that nothing like that happened...but he doesnt trust me anymore and doesnt believe me. theyre talking right now about "what to do wiht me" i think that theres only two things that they might do. theyre either making me switch schools...or theyre gonna tell me that me and joshy can no longer be. : (. i will NEVER forgive them if they do that to me. EVER. they know that i have been so much happier the last nine months...and its because ive been with joshy. it kills them to see that a boy has made me this happy...and not them. i will be heart broken if that happens. i wish that they could trust me...but they cant. and the sad part about it is that i havent done ANYTHING to make them not trust me. and they wont get their heads outta their asses to realize it. i dont know what to do anymore...

today i did something that has changed my life forever

- i looked in the mirror. what did i see? a disgrace. i am some retarded teenager that has no plans, not the slightest bit attractive, and a disgrace to her parents. WHY am i here? i dont know. but im so tired of feeling like this.

i really dont know what to do anymore...but i guess it doesnt matter.