(no subject)
Okay, so I know it's only January but I'm already making amazing plans for the end of next year. It's just been decided that part of October will be spent in Rome with Megan & in November I'm going to Punta Cana with Kristi & Nicole. Seriously, I need to start saving money like yesterday. & I have no idea how I am going to work this into my school schedule, but believe me. I'm following through on both of these trips & I'll probably have the time of my life. Tanning by the Mediterranean with Megan, then dancing on bars in Punta Cana with Kristi. Can't wait dude. Make it be October, NOW!
Tonight was my first night on the floor by myself @ Benny's. I'm enjoying it. It's pretty cool there. All of the girls are really nice & I enjoy that all of the dudes are old & ugly. HAHA. No opportunities for work place romances. Thank god.
The past couple of days have been really strange as far as Nick is concerned. I ONCE AGAIN told him yesterday to leave me alone for good. Then, I cried. Yeah, I fucking cried because of Nick. It's been FOREVER since I've cried because of him. I was so sad yesterday because for some strange reason because of talking to him again so often, I started to care about him again. I know, I'm retarded. & that's why I told him I can't talk to him anymore. It just made me so sad because he actually agreed to leave me alone. Which is what I wanted, but at the same time, it upsets me because for some reason when I don't talk to him I feel like something is missing. How is it possible that someone who has hurt me so much still takes up so much of my heart? & no matter how much I try to stay away or try to convince myself of how bad he is for me, I can't follow through. Hopefully this time since I told him to stay away from me & he agreed it will work. LAME.
OH & I've completely & totally given up on Jay. Waste of my time.
Tonight was my first night on the floor by myself @ Benny's. I'm enjoying it. It's pretty cool there. All of the girls are really nice & I enjoy that all of the dudes are old & ugly. HAHA. No opportunities for work place romances. Thank god.
The past couple of days have been really strange as far as Nick is concerned. I ONCE AGAIN told him yesterday to leave me alone for good. Then, I cried. Yeah, I fucking cried because of Nick. It's been FOREVER since I've cried because of him. I was so sad yesterday because for some strange reason because of talking to him again so often, I started to care about him again. I know, I'm retarded. & that's why I told him I can't talk to him anymore. It just made me so sad because he actually agreed to leave me alone. Which is what I wanted, but at the same time, it upsets me because for some reason when I don't talk to him I feel like something is missing. How is it possible that someone who has hurt me so much still takes up so much of my heart? & no matter how much I try to stay away or try to convince myself of how bad he is for me, I can't follow through. Hopefully this time since I told him to stay away from me & he agreed it will work. LAME.
OH & I've completely & totally given up on Jay. Waste of my time.