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[watsonk]

What insanely self-indulgent thing would you do regularly if you had the time and the money. I'm talking ridiculously indulgent, so much so that you probably wouldn't actually do it even if you had the time and money

Comments

[mrbehemoth]

First, I would skip merrily through a nearby shopping mall dressed as a manatee. Then I would hurl myself through the plate glass display window of a carpet shop and buy their entire stock. Swathing myself in faux-Turkish splendour, I would purchase a large machine gun and use it to gain entry to a matinee performance of La Boheme, where I would squat froglike on the music stand of the lead trombonist, periodically shouting Romanian swearwords at the conductor. Following this, a light lunch and a flight to the Sudan, where I would seek out as many giraffes as I could find and deface their flanks with slogans advocating the mild and gradual reform of the taxation system. Upon my inevitable arrest, I would thrust both hands down the official shorts of the arresting officer and sing loud, tuneless, impromptu calyspos all the way to the station, where I would show them the forged Diplomatic Immunity documents I had cannily obtained from the Forged Diplomatic Immunity Shop next to the carpet store. I would be on the next plane home, and would spend the next eight months flying back and forth to destinations determined by sticking a pin in a copy of Where In The World Is Carmen Sandiego? After this grew wearisome, I would hie me to the nearest beach and pay homeless men to mate with crabs.

Then I'd get a nice haircut and a hamburger.

[watsonk]

A much more imaginative effort. Eleventy-six/10.