i'm so...completely unhealable, baby.

[wateva]

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i figure that if i keep running towards whatever hopefully is waiting for me, i'll pass you up. and when i do, i'll wave sweetly and tell you that i need you like VD, smiling with the wind blowing in my hair and the sun behind me, casting my faint silhouette and my tall beautiful man will have one arm around me while extending a lovely "fuck you" from the other.
surely, this will never happen. i can only dream about perfect scenarios.

i want to push myself further, see the bigger picture while still taking time to appreciate all the elements that compose it, and learn to love.
i mean really, truly love.
something is pulling me as much as i resist, curiosity urges me to go deeper, to turn more corners, to run towards what's on the horizon. i know i'm young, inexperienced, slightly nervous, broken, and splitting at the seams with contradiction. but i know it, and would never deny myself.
i believe i have just begun to take my first steps.