Found it on Robin's
"It has been known for many years that Sex was healthy, but until now nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric content of different sexual activities. Now, after "original and proprietary" research, they are proud to present the results:
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent...............................12 Calories
Without her consent............................2187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands................................8 Calories
With one hand..................................12 Calories
With your teeth................................485 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection...............................6 Calories
Without an erection............................3315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary....................................12 Calories
69 lying down...................................78 Calories
69 standing up.................................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow....................................216 Calories
Doggy Style....................................326 Calories
Italian chandelier............................2912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real.........................................112 Calories
Fake..........................................1315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging.................................18 Calories
Getting up immediately...............................36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately.......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years....................................36 Calories
30-39 years....................................80 Calories
40-49 years....................................124 Calories
50-59 years....................................1972 Calories
60-69 years....................................7916 Calories
70 and over....................................Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly.........................................32 Calories
In a hurry.....................................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door...........5218
With your wife knocking at the door............13,521 Calories
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent...............................12 Calories
Without her consent............................2187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands................................8 Calories
With one hand..................................12 Calories
With your teeth................................485 Calories
PUTTING ON A CONDOM:
With an erection...............................6 Calories
Without an erection............................3315 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary....................................12 Calories
69 lying down...................................78 Calories
69 standing up.................................812 Calories
Wheelbarrow....................................216 Calories
Doggy Style....................................326 Calories
Italian chandelier............................2912 Calories
ORGASMS:
Real.........................................112 Calories
Fake..........................................1315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging.................................18 Calories
Getting up immediately...............................36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately.......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years....................................36 Calories
30-39 years....................................80 Calories
40-49 years....................................124 Calories
50-59 years....................................1972 Calories
60-69 years....................................7916 Calories
70 and over....................................Results are still pending
DRESSING AFTERWARDS:
Calmly.........................................32 Calories
In a hurry.....................................98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door...........5218
With your wife knocking at the door............13,521 Calories