nnnnIIIIII
Mom is putting up the Christmas lights and drinking beer; I'm deejaying the holiday mix and peering mournfully at the bottom of my hot cocoa mug. I've sat on this couch in the piano room and gazed at the Christmas tree in years before, sometimes alone and sometimes not. I remember a new beginning here two Christmases ago... has it only been that long? I don't understand how three years can feel like an eternity and the blink of an eye all at once. Not quite three years, I suppose, if it makes any difference.
I think I've been clear. In which case I have to take any response at face value. Or no response. I feel like I should feel differently. Should I? Do I? More than a faint disappointment and a ruefully amused acceptance, at any rate. I think I'm right, though, considering what's (not) come of it, so I'm confident. Does he understand? I'm unconvinced. Tant pis.
Anyway, I'm off for now - to find more Christmas music or to make some cookies; I haven't decided yet. Oh, but laundry first.
Happy Holidays!
(Mom's complaining now. Ugh.)
I think I've been clear. In which case I have to take any response at face value. Or no response. I feel like I should feel differently. Should I? Do I? More than a faint disappointment and a ruefully amused acceptance, at any rate. I think I'm right, though, considering what's (not) come of it, so I'm confident. Does he understand? I'm unconvinced. Tant pis.
Anyway, I'm off for now - to find more Christmas music or to make some cookies; I haven't decided yet. Oh, but laundry first.
Happy Holidays!
(Mom's complaining now. Ugh.)