(no subject)
He was beautiful.
The soft lines of his eyes which looked directly at you.
The smile that came easily to his mouth.
Tall and thin -- tall that you had to crane your neck up to look at him, thin that he may as well be made out of toothpicks.
No matter who you were, you had his undivided attention, and you just knew that he was listening to every syllable you spoke with sincerity.
He had a gentle, calming voice.
He had that kind of light around him -- warm, but a bit lonesome and sad at the same time.
I would have fallen in love with him. It was only a matter of time.
A matter of time for any other girl who'd ever come in contact with him, in fact.
Until you heard from the grapevine, or from him directly.
He was gay.
And it is at that moment that you knew it was too good to be true. This came as a shock to me. Not all at once, but bit by bit, the more I thought about it.
I couldn't quite make the transition... someone you thought was just another guy, was gay? The problem was, he wasn't just another guy. That fact made the impact bigger.
And I'd never come in contact with a gay person before. I wasn't prepared.
Then, I began to avoid his eyes. Avoid listening to his voice. Avoid his presence in general.
I couldn't bear to not.
Not when my brain was a mixture of sand, dirt, clay, rocks, and water in a jar. I had to be alone to settle it all.
He probably thought I was acting funny. I hope he didn't take it the wrong way.
Please, help me organize my thoughts. Help me become good friends with him, for we can talk and laugh about many things.
Help me be able to look at him without flinching.
It all makes me want to cry. I can't help myself being drawn to him, yet I cannot have him.
Please help me be normal around him.
****************************************************
I'm so glad it's Saturday and that MOnday is Labor Day. NO SCHOOL!!! YAAAAYYY!!!!
I want to go somewhere. Anywhere. I want to talk with someone.
Perhaps I shall talk to my bunny. For bunnies are very good listeners. I lub my bunny >____< She learned how to jump out of her cage!! Smart bunny!!!
My bunny ate my pants.
The soft lines of his eyes which looked directly at you.
The smile that came easily to his mouth.
Tall and thin -- tall that you had to crane your neck up to look at him, thin that he may as well be made out of toothpicks.
No matter who you were, you had his undivided attention, and you just knew that he was listening to every syllable you spoke with sincerity.
He had a gentle, calming voice.
He had that kind of light around him -- warm, but a bit lonesome and sad at the same time.
I would have fallen in love with him. It was only a matter of time.
A matter of time for any other girl who'd ever come in contact with him, in fact.
Until you heard from the grapevine, or from him directly.
He was gay.
And it is at that moment that you knew it was too good to be true. This came as a shock to me. Not all at once, but bit by bit, the more I thought about it.
I couldn't quite make the transition... someone you thought was just another guy, was gay? The problem was, he wasn't just another guy. That fact made the impact bigger.
And I'd never come in contact with a gay person before. I wasn't prepared.
Then, I began to avoid his eyes. Avoid listening to his voice. Avoid his presence in general.
I couldn't bear to not.
Not when my brain was a mixture of sand, dirt, clay, rocks, and water in a jar. I had to be alone to settle it all.
He probably thought I was acting funny. I hope he didn't take it the wrong way.
Please, help me organize my thoughts. Help me become good friends with him, for we can talk and laugh about many things.
Help me be able to look at him without flinching.
It all makes me want to cry. I can't help myself being drawn to him, yet I cannot have him.
Please help me be normal around him.
****************************************************
I'm so glad it's Saturday and that MOnday is Labor Day. NO SCHOOL!!! YAAAAYYY!!!!
I want to go somewhere. Anywhere. I want to talk with someone.
Perhaps I shall talk to my bunny. For bunnies are very good listeners. I lub my bunny >____< She learned how to jump out of her cage!! Smart bunny!!!
My bunny ate my pants.