(no subject)
I've been in a frenzy. I've been in writing mode. I've been tired. I've been wanting to clean and clean and organize and distinguish the clutter. I've been super brutal and honest lately. I haven't been the nice girl who avoids confrontation and conflict anymore. I don't want to avoid anything. It's funny how Alison is ridding of her anger while I'm actually trying to embrace more of it. During appropiate times of course. I realized I'm too neutral and try desperately to avoid any kind of emotion, whether happy or angry. Emotions are good. You can't take the emotions out of an emotional person. I know it's there buried deep in my gut. I can't suppress it anymore.
So I'm not sure of what to do. I really wanted to talk to someone about it tonight. But I'm actually glad that no one is there to talk to. It clears my head and I know the inner voice from within will guide me to the best direction. I dunno, I can't waste anymore time with music. I know I have everything going for me but getting that initial push is what I'm waiting for. And no one is there to push me just yet.
I really don't know what's going to happen with my musical career but I know somewhere deep in my heart that it will work itself out and that I will get the exposure I've always wanted eventually.
I guess I shouldn't really think or overanalyze it.
I miss her so much. Today I didn't really get to speak to her. I did a few times but I was a bit distracted with work.
I'm sure she'll come back with a different perspective of life and share her experience with me. I love her so much, it's weird. I have no desire of wanting or feeling the need of other people's attention.
I'm gonna play guitar now. My hands are burning.
So I'm not sure of what to do. I really wanted to talk to someone about it tonight. But I'm actually glad that no one is there to talk to. It clears my head and I know the inner voice from within will guide me to the best direction. I dunno, I can't waste anymore time with music. I know I have everything going for me but getting that initial push is what I'm waiting for. And no one is there to push me just yet.
I really don't know what's going to happen with my musical career but I know somewhere deep in my heart that it will work itself out and that I will get the exposure I've always wanted eventually.
I guess I shouldn't really think or overanalyze it.
I miss her so much. Today I didn't really get to speak to her. I did a few times but I was a bit distracted with work.
I'm sure she'll come back with a different perspective of life and share her experience with me. I love her so much, it's weird. I have no desire of wanting or feeling the need of other people's attention.
I'm gonna play guitar now. My hands are burning.